Tumgik
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
pov: Misha started talking
719 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
“Two guys hugging it out saying goodbye” I’m sorry, what!? Why is no one talking about this? Did they cut a hug from the confession scene?
Tumblr media
664 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
I'm simultaneously "poor misha", "when someone tells you, believe them", and "raise your hand if you've ever told someone you were straight."
448 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
Below the cut is a transcription of Jensen and Misha talking about Castiel's goodbye scene and "love confession" in 15.18, from the JenMish panel at NJCon 2022. With thanks to the panel video maker.
Misha: Cas’s declaration of love. That was very…that got me. It was also the scene I had to put myself in a little bubble and really like protect my actor self for. On Supernatural—I’m revealing something I probably shouldn’t be revealing but I’m going to—on Supernatural we f*ck around a lot on set. 
Jensen: *mock GASP!!!* Misha: That was a scene and a night where I really just had to let myself be in that scene and it was also my last scene on the show ever. So it was Cas’s goodbye and it was my goodbye to the cast and crew and it was good-bye to a long run and a big chapter in life. It was very very meaningful to me in a lot of ways. Rob Hayter is our stunt co-ordinator. I did something I never did on Supernatural which is I went off into a dark corner of the stages and sat on a folding chair and just stayed in the emotional place and Rob Hayter saw me like off in the shadows and just took care of me, making sure no one came near me, and I never asked him to do anything, I never said a word, he just created this little bubble around me, and then when 1st AD would call us back to set [Rob would] *gestures gentle touch on the shoulder* and then escort me so that nobody would bother me. It was such a sweet thing to do. That for me was it.
Jensen: Because it was such a pivotal moment, in just the whole arc of the show, was Misha’s last scene, Misha’s goodbye, Castiel’s goodbye to Dean, and I had — *to Misha* I don’t know if I told you — I had Maisie our assistant props — I gave her my phone and I said “will you just record some of these takes for me” from off set and you could hear her whimper, literally crying while she’s recording…you see it together and stuff…but it was just you and I standing there surrounded by lights and cameras and it was two guys hugging it out and saying good-bye. It was really…
Misha: Speight was directing and he would come back from the monitors and tears were coming down his — everyone was crying — it was one of those moments that felt like the end for a lot of things for a lot of people and it felt real. This is cheesy and it’s difficult to articulate if you’re not really within the experience but we played these characters for so long that they became a part of us and that sounds really cheesy and actor-y but it’s actually true. When Cas was saying “I love you” and “good-bye” it was heartbreaking for me…we’ve had conversations about this, like that dream you had about Sam and Dean and the end of the show. And when you told me and Jared that, all three of us teared up. We became so emotionally enmeshed with these characters over time these things felt really meaningful, at least to me.
Jensen: It that scene I remember in that scene, on your coverage, watching you give this beautiful performance, but I was also watching my friend say good-bye and there were some expressions in there that weren’t Castiel. And I remember seeing that, and I think that broke me more than the scene itself, was witnessing Misha’s goodbye to Castiel and goodbye to the show, and I was — whew — getting misty right now just thinking about it. In the same vibe…my goodbye scene which was very similar. I didn’t go away, I didn’t sit anywhere, I didn’t need to, the whole crew left, and they were there for the first take I think and then I saw boxes of tissues being passed around…
Rob: You also couldn’t go away because you were impaled to a wall.
Jensen: This is true.
[laughter] Jensen: And we’re back. That was…yeah that was a hard one…it was Jensen saying goodbye to not just Dean but saying goodbye to Sam. And as a fan of the show and a fan of these brothers and these characters and relationships, that scene *points at Misha* and the impalement scene *points at Rob* were really difficult. I remember I did tell Bob who directed the finale, I said “listen I got about three takes in me, I don’t know if I’ll have much left after that.” He said “that’s all I need.” I think I did three takes. That was rough.
youtube
377 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
youtube
the cockles panel from another angle :)
431 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Serotonin ✨
1K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
*stripping music starts playing*
jensen:
Tumblr media
2K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
hello i am having thoughts TM
and yes, these are cockles thoughts, and yes it’ll probably get a little tinhatty, but i don’t care. we’re doing what we’re doing tonight, aren’t we?
anyway, first of all, a label doesn’t define a relationship. 
okay that’s out of the way. 
onto what i think it’s going on. 
i think… 
that in the course of his marriage and experimentation and all that, over the years, it’s mostly been with another women, by vicki’s own words in her book. it feels like that was the trend. […] ETA: i have changed this sentence to take out indications in the book that he may have been with men. i typed it odd and realized i implied that. […] idk if it ticked enough boxes for him. labels mean different things to different people personally when presented with them. 
time goes by, meets jackles. things hit off. a friend mentioned men in woods sounded tentative, and i agree, and i’m sure plenty of y’all felt that too. i am also one of those little monsters that thinks it’s about jackles, personally. 
like he did not intiate anyhting in that poem. something happened in that poem for it to be included at the end of that section of love, especially when the first poem in that section is about someone else making, i assumed vicki, happier than misha made her feel. i’m free for different interpretations on that, since i’m admittedly not that great with poetry lol.
so the last poem to me, MIW, is about someone who makes him feel happy.
but god as my witness i don’t think he thinks a a few trysts as part of a threesome or whatever with a dude over the course of his marriage and then one relationship that’s really deep in several kinds of ways with one other man is enough to convince misha he’s anything but straight with some fluidity thrown in there.
i think he’s been opening up more, however. i and a lot of others, maybe you reading this was thinking that too. that cas and pride month post, wearing pride merch outside of pride month etc etc. 
one thing from his thread that stood out to me was this 
Tumblr media
i think he needs to talk about it. Or wants to talk about it even. last week, or so, there was an article published by Natalie Fisher. in there she talked about that little cas essay thing that we always hoped he’d publish. in there he said this:
Tumblr media
so i don’t think he thinks he’s queer enough to get a queer label or talk in these spaces. 
before I go on, i just want to preface this by saying i do respect where he wants to land. if he says he’s something, by golly i’ll salute and say ‘yes sir’ because it’s his life and that’s what he wants. but straight doesn’t mean the frat bro down the road who has a massive pick up truck and will constantly tell you that it’s only boobs babes and beer in his brain. like that’s not everything. 
there’s a no mans land between what someone can perceive bisexuality or pansexuality to mean, and what they perceive straight to be. i don’t know his definitions. i don’t know how he looks at these things. but we know he’s been kissed by another man, been on a camping trip with them, skinny dipped in a ‘shallow stream’. we also know his other little quips over the years that have indicated more or less why we thought he’d land in Queerland USA. 
clearly that didn’t happen. and personally, and i’m not saying this to invalidate him, but personally i think what he needed is to talk to people about this. idk maybe he’s doing it IRL and we’re naturally not privvy to it. but again, i go back to this part of his tweet
Tumblr media
and how he brought up even bisexuality in a little comment about being introverted or extroverted. he didn’t have to do that. and he didn’t have to make the other comments too. 
i think he wants to discuss it, or wanted to. 
but his quip [adhd is a curse] flew too close to the sun. i absolutely do not think the media would have picked up on it if we weren’t parading it around everywhere. but i also fault the media as well, publishing these articles about him without speaking with him, even getting facts wrong about his personal life. everyone has skin in this horribile game so we may as well own up to it. there’s no different between a reporter assuming what his words meant, and us assuming what his words meant. 
so again, i do think that he wanted to talk about it but it’s been a hard conversation to have. 
and now idk if we’ll ever get it. 
the press got ahold of it and once it hit people magazine, i think this is what happened [warning, tinfoil on!]:
1) he now realized he couldn’t really talk about it anymore. 
2) i truly think those articles were a little scary and was getting out of hand. the articles named his children and his ex wife. he has to make sure they’re okay. his kids are getting older, they’re online now. idk if they have twitter or anything but peers may, and peers may see his name trending and click on it wondering what’s going on. protect the family. 
3) any confirmation that he considers himself slightly off the path of straight now opens up people to pry into his private life. you know what’s just beneath the surface of ‘is misha bi????’
cockles shit. you don’t think the press can find this stuff? someone posted about them living together after that tweet last summer, based off of information they had received [which, unrelated but slightly related, very not cool at all wtf]. you don’t think a journalist won’t find misha’s poly comments? his wife’s book? dig up old gossip on jensen of all people? and i bring him up especially because that man has already had gossip columnists accusing him of being gay since early in his career. there were gossip blogs claiming j2 were a thing so much — why would misha want him to go through that again? takes maybe a night of digging through things and receipts. we documented that shit well. 
so that leads me to 
4) protect friends, but especially jensen. like okay again, very VERY tinhatty, but if we’re taking an objective eye to this, it’s clear that even if they’re just friends, they’re pretty damn good friends. with all the jokes over the years, all of our own receipts and speculation, all of the past context a journalist needs to dig up rumors that jensen is, once again, ~*gaaay! oooohhh!!!*~ that’s not great news. 
and from there that’s how Dee gets roped into it, that’s how THEIR kids get roped into it. they’ve had to deal with these allegations before, and they’re pretty private as a family. don’t want to drag people through that. 
so
if misha decided to yoink a label that he didn’t feel comfortable yoinking in the first place, but decided to yoink a queer label without meaningful discussions with people about his sexuality, like he clearly has on his mind, then that would have opened up family, friends, family OF the friends, his whole life up, others’ whole lives up…
and we know what hollywood does to men when this happens. 
no, i don’t think misha intentionally sabotaged himself in the name of cockles or whatever, but i do think this is a multi-faceted thing. 
he’s straight, by his own definition. but it still doesn’t feel like the whole story. and all we can really do is just keep holding hands with him and hope one day there are things he can tell us.
648 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Jensen “Misha’s the funniest thing that’s ever happened to me” Ackles
1K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Note
"sick to my stomach I couldn't be bisexual for all of you"
HES SO UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY LIKE WHAT
3K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
The thing about Misha collins is that he makes me feel so much better about any embarrassing thing I’ve done in my life. If he can do this I can live thru giving the wrong answer in class. Thank you Misha collins best ally ever
3K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
It’s 6AM and I’m going to sleep but before I do:
please be kind to Misha. Please do not let this one thing change how you see him. He has done incredible work over the years, he has been nothing but kind to fans and when he says he is sick to his stomach because he has to say some things that he knows will upset some of us, he means it. I feel like now is a good time to rememember that we are all human and mistakes are part of being human. If you have followed Misha so far, you’ll know he’d never do anything malicious on purpose. I know this feels very personal to some of us but really it is only personal to him. Any of us can walk away from this, he can’t. Don’t be mean.
803 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Tattoo (x)
1K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
Putting thoughts in order
In line with what @wigglebox has said here and here, and what @cynifer shared here, I want to add a few thoughts just to put them down and move on from the issue.
- The situation is weird and things don’t add up (how it started, the Stands tweets, etc); we don’t know quite what happened but it evidently spiraled out and turned into a mess. It sucks, but it’ll pass.
- Straight is the label he’s shared with us, and all respect to that. Of course. He has his reason(s) for it and he knows them better than we do.
- Straight, however, doesn’t necessarily mean 0-on-the-Kinsey-Scale-never-had-a-single-homoerotic-thought-in-my-life. Sexuality is a spectrum and straight doesn’t fall outside of it.
- Even if Misha were a Kinsey 0 (and how likely is that, by his poems alone?) that doesn’t change the (wonderful) person he is, what he’s said and what he’s done. It doesn’t invalidate or erase all the stuff on the Cockles masterposts, for example.
- On that note, it also doesn’t change the fact that he knows about Cockles and is fine with fans having their fun.
The drama is, in the end, mostly about the emotion fueled clusterfuck of this weekend. We’ll know more about Misha’s life when and if he decides to. I really hope he’s okay and that he gets to a place where it’s easier than this.
Meanwhile, I think it can be business as usual in fandom. We can tinhat or speculate as long as we follow the usual rules of keeping it respectful and within the fandom.
I’m probably forgetting something or not explaining properly, but that’s what I got right now.
185 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
1K notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
It strikes me that Jensen felt comfortable enough to:
Open up about having been diagnosed with a learning disability as a kid, which we have NEVER heard him talk about, and then add that he still struggles with it now.
Talk about the emotional impact of BOTH Cas's confession scene and Dean's death scene.
Really interact with the audience and ask them questions back, which we never see any of them do outside of Rome.
Discuss ALL of his projects, including The Winchesters and The Boys and not just Walker.
It was like he didn't feel the need to choose. Like he could talk about everything he wanted to talk about. And I don't know that we've ever seen that before, even at JIB. Surely we aren't the only ones who see how much better this is.
715 notes · View notes
lulu-zodiac · 2 years
Text
+40 yo actor men
1K notes · View notes