I'm a cryptid in Stardew valley. I live on the outskirts of town. I disappear for days on end, purchasing daily one-way tickets to the calico desert. Nobody knows where I go while I'm there. Can occasionally be found fishing at random spots throughout town. I am never not running on at least one triple shot espresso. I take the abandoned minecarts to get around and am frequently seen disappearing into the sewers. I carry a sword for some reason. Once every week or two I will stride into your bedroom to deliver you your favorite meal. I'm a self-made millionaire. I attend all the town events and will go to your concert in the next town over. I have donated approximately 2583 items to the local museum and singlehandedly revitalized the town community center. There are rumors I can talk to junimos. I'm friends with the local wizard

you could commit a terrible crime against your sister, and she would still come looking for you in the morning

what’s the opposite of unrequited love but they still can’t be together?

new trio dynamic: the two who always get into stupid debates and the one who fact checks

want to be pleasantly surprised? read some cars fanfiction

when will my existence not make people angry?

there is something so isolating about being surrounded by your mother’s language, and not being able to speak it

Anthony Bourdain, from Les Halles Cookbook

i miss being loved

“The average US president has been charged with 1.54 felonies” factoid isn’t true. The average US President has been charged with 0 felonies. Donald trump, who has been charged with 71, is a statistical outlier and should not have been counted

Or water fountains, public washrooms, outdoors tables, etc, etc

kids play pretend! let a kid pretend to gender whatever gender they wanna pretend!!

you think you’re waiting for love to find you when in reality it has saved you in a thousand different ways since the sun rose today

(yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist) (yearns for a past that does not exist)

we are in a media literacy crisis