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iridescentides · 7 days
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ACE’S 1K CELEBRATION ↳ 🎁 for @avalance
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iridescentides · 8 days
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Destinies Intertwined
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iridescentides · 8 days
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@lgbtqcreators creators challenge | colours ⤷ Mamma Mia! + pantone shades of blue (insp.)
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iridescentides · 9 days
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2 Best Friends // Waterparks
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iridescentides · 10 days
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get to know me meme >> Favorite Movies [19/?] The Nightmare Before Christmas
Boys and girls of every age, wouldn’t you like to see something strange?
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iridescentides · 11 days
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Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed (2004) dir. Raja Gosnell
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iridescentides · 11 days
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@maisiepetersnetwork​ event: love songs favorite love song by member (collaborative edit)
the last one -> @cascadeoceanwave funeral -> @good-enemy john hughes movie -> @antoniosvivaldi glowing review -> @cascadeoceanwave adore you -> @good-enemy the party -> @starstruck2010
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iridescentides · 12 days
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When I see people sharing so much of their kids' lives, I think about that one time my child told a joke, I shared that joke with ONE FRIEND in a private conversation, and my child said "can you please ask me next time, before you tell people something about me?"
And, yes, I absolutely should. So I apologized, and now I ask.
"I love that video of you, can I show it to a friend?"
"Can I tell a friend about how clever you were just now?"
"Can I share this in the family group chat?"
"Can I show your art to grandma and grandpa?"
And it's not like my kids don't like when I share their jokes and puns and fun moments. They love it! But they want to have control over what I share with people. Even without their faces or their names. Even people we know and trust.
And they deserve to have that control.
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iridescentides · 12 days
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2k Celebration ✧ Top 5 Comfort Movies (as voted by my followers) ↳ #2 Mean Girls (2004)
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iridescentides · 12 days
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there is a huge difference between criticizing an institution and criticizing individual behavior. i can criticize the makeup industry without criticizing the 14 year old girl who uses concealer because she’s self-conscious about her acne; i can criticize the plastic surgery industry without vilifying the woman who decided to get a nose job after two decades of pointed comments and bullying. it is intellectually dishonest to respond to an institutional criticism as if it were a personal attack; on the flip side, it is cruel and unnecessary to leverage personal attacks in the name of institutional criticism
if i see one (1) more person respond to a perfectly reasonable beauty-industry-critical sentiment with “but i personally enjoy eyeshadow. why are you attacking people who like eyeshadow :(” or “exactly, all women who wear makeup are miserable and brainwashed” i am going to climb a tree and bite the top of it
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iridescentides · 13 days
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Film meme: [4/5] comedy » MEAN GIRLS (2004) Get in loser, we’re going shopping!
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iridescentides · 13 days
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i am aware of the problems. however. i would rather be comfy in my bed. good night.
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iridescentides · 13 days
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there's this video you've probably seen already where a woman is shaking in front of a microphone and delicately tries to ask - how can i make my husband listen to me, i've tried everything, i don't want to seem ungrateful and the other man laughs - the problem is that you married a man, we're only listening 25% of the time and we only understand 5% of that! and the audience laughs and the woman laughs and you just sat there, phone in your hand, letting the sound of it echo
and the thing is that people make think-pieces about it (isn't this one of them) and satire versions and "flipping the script" which is good and fun but at the end of the day, there's some truth in that man's response about men-not-listening. and you have tried to language that feeling for years, this sense that you can only take up 33% of a conversation before others view it as being "dominating".
it's not that they aren't listening, it's that the action they're taking is purposefully silencing. it's different. you accidentally-don't-listen a lot; just because the world is loud and you're distracted. you don't mean anything by it. and the truth is that the man who spoke is relying on that to be true of you; the way it's true of everyone. but there is a different undertone to his kind of not-listening. what he means is they don't respect you and you shouldn't expect them to. there is a difference between oh shit i forgot to take the trash out and why didn't you remind me to do it, just like there is a difference between i didn't realize you wanted to go out this weekend and why do you expect me to plan things why can't you just tell me where we're going.
and the thing is that it isn't just him, and it's actually not just because of your gender - your skin, your class status, your weight, their ableism - it happens often. so often it feels like a tightness around your throat and a weight in your stomach. you're not even "really" allowed to be upset about it, because to them it's a joke. and they laugh. and you know exactly the amount of work that goes into every conversation. how you have to work to condense down your thoughts into intelligent, crisp soundbites; worried someone will try to swoop in and cut you off. and there's this sense from everyone else - oh stop being so sensitive, are you really upset just because they weren't listening and you don't know how to say the way that feels when it happens constantly.
there's that video of the science summit where a woman in the audience finally says let her speak please! and the whole crowd bursts into applause and the man leading the summit holds up his hands and bows his head and says oops, sorry! like what he did was awkward and embarrassing, a little social gaffe that happens easily. later in your meetings, you're asked to take notes, and you don't say anything, you just hear let her speak please! ringing in your head and know that you'll never be brave enough for that kind of thing. and besides. think of all the people who agree this was a one-off, he just got excited and all of the people who say one man is not indicative of all of society
at the dinner table you're talking about someone you don't like and how he's not good to his girlfriend and how she always has to remind him to put the effort in and before him, she was glowing with curiosity and passion but now she just seems... tired, unhappy. that he likes the way she burns out; she stays home and takes care of him and their 2 kids. and your father sniffs and says that men take a while to learn those kinds of things. and you just stare at him and think about your childhood and are like - no wonder i turned out like this
and you want to say - there's no fucking secret school or mystic form of communication. i was not sent to Rearing a Child University. i did not graduate from Getting Chores Done College. i ask questions and i listen and i pay attention, because that's basic fucking human decency. it stems from respect, and how i respect others and their agency. i clean the house because someone should clean. not because it comes "naturally".
hell, you had to google "how to boil an egg" the other day, just because you usually make them scrambled. you can never remember which of the 2 bathroom cleaners make chlorine gas, only that two of them definitely do. you've accidentally bleached your clothes. it took you like 3 years of self-teaching before you figured out how to actually cook things correctly - for that whole time, you burnt or undercooked everything. but you did teach yourself; just like you taught yourself how to listen with empathy. just like how you taught yourself to think before you speak. to be kind first, to be better at communicating. it seemed like a good thing, an adult thing.
the joke the man in the video makes is that women say i'm fine! when they are not fine. and you think about the 150 conversations that happened around that; about how she probably has had so many arguments with her husband. how she said i'm upset you don't take me anywhere and he got mad at her because of course i do, you made me go to that stupid restaurant like last week and she probably said that's not what i'm saying and he said now i'm supposed to be psychic or something and she said no of course not and he said how am i supposed to know what to do when you don't even like everything and she said i do like things and he said well how am i supposed to win? and her pastor probably told her to be more grateful because they do things at all, even if she has to plan them and her mom probably told her that's just how men are honey and she probably cried over her journal, trying to figure out why the fuck she "has everything" and is still so bitterly, horribly unhappy
and how, in your life, for so many reasons, you looked down the barrel of another argument; of explaining yourself and being vulnerable and begging for help again. how many times you just said i'm fine because it was better than doing that again; it was better than wringing yourself out when it's literally easier to just pretend. because he wasn't going to listen. your father wasn't going to be better and your boyfriend wasn't going to be better and your boss wasn't going to be more respectful.
and you sit in front of a video of a woman shaking, looking horrible and guilt-wrought that she's even asking this question. and you know; deep in your heart - that's you. in a different life, you are her. you've stood in her spot. and you had to listen while someone else cackled - why would we bother to notice when you talk?
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iridescentides · 13 days
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As part of my 4k celebration, here is another gift! More textures/gif overlays for use.
Included are 16 textures in GIF format-- each gif has a regular (unedited) version and a version that is edited in B/W or transparent, for 33 files in total.
Please like/reblog if using. No credit necessary! You can make any changes you want and use however/wherever you would like, but Do Not repost or claim as your own!
Download: [MEGA] Also check out my previous gif textures and PNGs.
Textures used on preview gif: Line Border, Purple Shimmer, & Bokeh 03
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iridescentides · 13 days
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whatever, I post for myself (<- clearly checking notes every 30 seconds, tears in her eyes aching for someone to interact with her posts)
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iridescentides · 13 days
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CHAPPELL ROAN [insp]
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iridescentides · 14 days
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Oh, and we always vote before we ask someone to eat lunch with us because you have to be considerate of the rest of the group.
Mean Girls (2004) dir. Mark Waters
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