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incorrectmarvels · 2 months
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Peter: Getting up a 6am made me realize that 6am isn’t a place it’s an emotion
Tony: 6am isn’t a place at all
Peter: That’s because it’s an emotion
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incorrectmarvels · 2 months
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Peter: I accidentally ate MJ’s sandwich… How long do you think I have to live?
Ned: Ten
Peter: Ten what?
Ned: Nine
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incorrectmarvels · 3 months
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Steve: What are you gonna bring to the Christmas dinner?
Bucky: My negative attitude and my sparkling personality.
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incorrectmarvels · 3 months
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Scott: Christmas gets so much harder as you get older.
Scott: “What do you want for Christmas?” I don’t know?
Scott: Financial security? A stable job?
Hope: A nap would be nice.
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incorrectmarvels · 3 months
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Bucky: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We’ll hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to fight whoever else is underneath.
Steve: We are not doing that.
Sam: Mistlefoe.
Steve: Guys, no!
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incorrectmarvels · 5 months
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Steve: Are you going to help or are you too pretty?
Tony: I’m too pretty.
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incorrectmarvels · 10 months
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Steve: I have a plan.
Fury: It can’t involve overthrowing the government.
Natasha: Okay well-
Fury: It also can’t involve murder.
Natasha and Steve: We have no plan.
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Peter: On Halloween, we dress like skeletons, but in reality, the skeletons dress like us.
Tony: I worry about you.
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Bucky: This year for Halloween, I got the bats that are smiling. It’s more realistic.
Steve: Why is it more realistic?
Bucky: Because they’re happy! It’s their favorite holiday! They love it!
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Peter: How are you gonna carve a gigantic pumpkin?
Harley: The same way I make onion rings.
Harley: *grabs a chainsaw*
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Peter: Trick or YEET?
Steve: Yeet?
Peter: *takes Steve’s shield and throws it*
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Kate: When I was younger I didn’t realize there was a Pride and Prejudice, I thought it always had zombies!
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incorrectmarvels · 1 year
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Peter: *quietly gazing out of a window*
Pepper: Is he okay?
Tony: He may just be thinking about life.
Pepper: But what if he’s sad?
Tony: Maybe he’s planning what to do tomorrow.
Peter: *has the Wii music playing on loop in his head*
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incorrectmarvels · 2 years
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THE RETURN OF THE KING
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incorrectmarvels · 2 years
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Natasha: How did you break your leg?
Clint: Do you see those porch stairs?
Natasha: Yes.
Clint: I didn't.
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incorrectmarvels · 2 years
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Kate, to Clint: I don’t understand why adults have a coffee problem, just wake up!
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incorrectmarvels · 2 years
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Tony: I’m not mad.
Peter: You literally just said you were mad.
Tony: No.
Peter: Two seconds ago, you said, “I’m mad about-”
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