in-the-belly-of-dragons
y'all mind if I scream
TTRG shows and apparently Baldurs Gate 3 blog now. Fantasy and D&D stfff. Lae'zel apologist. Rotating my favourite characters in my mind like a rotisserie chicken. Main @lazynoodlepuff I tag CR and D20 spoilers but not BG3 so beware. Also it started as CritRole blog and I still haven't made a proper header and avatar
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In general Astarion strikes me as someone who uses anger and just being mean as a protection and/or coping mechanism when he doesn't know how to deal with the things he's feeling. Which makes a lot of sense! It's so muvh easier to just be pissed off than unpack why thungs upset you anf how ro rationalise that, epsecially if you never had space for that
So like i wouldn't take a lot of his mean spirited bitchung as a gospel or personally
Hot Take: Astarion does NOT hate flowers. You just missed a few subtle hints through Act 1 and early Act 3.
Astarion's negatively is directed toward just about everything at all pleasant as you move through early act three, starting the moment you leave Wyrm's Rock. First thing after Gortash's coronation he marvels near tears at the colors of the city in daylight. If you ask if he's alright, it pisses him off.
There's other instances I can't quite remember but he's a straight crank throughout early Act 3 and it took me several hours of gameplay to have a lightbulb moment about his newly crappier attitude.
He just spent the last two hundred years seeing everything in the overwhelmingly warm dim tones of indoor lighting via sconces, rushlights, and braziers, or the dingy blue gray of moonlight outside. Daylight colors are something he had more than a lifetime to forget and now that he has a chance to remember that vibrancy in his own home town, he knows he's going to have to forget it all over again either by death or by remaining a vampire spawn forever. The worm isn't going to live rent free in his head forever, and killing Cazador to ascend in his place likely feels like an insurmountable and impossible fight against a literal titan who could stomp him flat without a corm of effort.
He doesn't hate flowers, he hates EVERYTHING right now because it's all going away very soon and if he convinces himself he hates everything then he won't miss it when it's all gone again. He was denied this for two hundred years and he's PISSED at what was stolen from him and PISSED it's all going away again.
He behaved a similarly in Act 1 about anyone besides him enjoying physical intimacy. Some of this content was cut, to my best knowledge, but the overwhelming majority of his dialog addressing the PC romancing anyone but him are negative or backhanded. This is for two reasons, I think. A: his Simple Plan just dissolved right before his eyes when you chose someone else which in his mind means he has zero safety net, and EVERYONE gets to enjoy sex (key wording being ENJOY, not simply having) except him... And it pisses him off.
He also gleefully interrupts the bug bear and the ogress, I think for the same reason as the above paragraph, being: If he doesn't get to enjoy intimacy neither do they.
He reacts with anger and disgust at anything he's being unfairly denied. Which... That's fair. His feelings are valid, but his reaction to it is pretty shitty and meanspirited.
The other companions I tend to keep in my party, (that is Lae'zel, Halsin, Karlach, and Wyll) however, are actually appearing to behave pretty patiently with him in Act 3 which I find interesting.
In the instance with the flowers Karlach doesn't bother trying to convince him otherwise of his opinion, she just tells him how they make her feel instead and rather than getting snippy or doubling down he more or less agrees to disagree. I also don't recall anyone disagreeing with him during Gale's last quest tasks when he mentioned that he quit praying to gods who wouldn't hear him a long time ago but to be fair, I think the gods did everybody in this crew dirty and they all know it. It seems like they're consciously giving him the space to be mad about things, is what I'm saying.
Everyone I know including myself who gets out of a long-term hot garbage situation kinda went wild for a bit with freedom, spoke poorly, behaved strangely, had extreme emotional reactions to things, and made some particularly terrible choices. I think that's just a part of recalibrating yourself, healing and learning how to be okay again.
Point is, I wouldn't conflate too many of the turbo-negative things he says with how he actually feels about anything. We certainly know what he says and what he feels are two very different things.
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played so much bg3, now drawing so much bg3
#bg3#its so funny bc thats ibviously bc devs wanted to make sure the player will get atcleast one copy if theys earch somenthing#but as someone who searches evwry shelf and pile and box you getvso manyvof them#which implies that whoever maintained the crypt was paranoid avout vampires lmao
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and the best blacksmith ofc <3
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Halsin of Emerald Grove nursery
and Leon Dorr who's been hitting on Halsin for a month now and still no hope. Don't give up Leon!!!
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durge: sceleritas I think I am transgender
sceleritas fel: ooohh what a splendid journey of self discovery! the death of the former self is one of the most beautiful murders of all, milord! now come, let's go set an orphanage on fire
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Astarion who kisses you like it will be his last. Who gasps breathlessly, regardless of needing to, his body acting on instinct. He kisses you as if he’ll never see you again, hand cradling your cheeks so tenderly, that it’s easy to forget that he is a predator, and you could quite easily be his prey. It’s as though he consumes you, mind body and soul, through such a simple, base, act of love.
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can you stop fucking around (looking in the mirror)
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Blade of Avernus
A little Wyll warm-up ❤️🔥
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the council will decide your fate (being kissed passionately)
(we had a chat about Vet!Halsin, who walks around with little birds under his hair and can carry a mastiff like it's nothing)
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shadowheart my beautiful sexy smart emotionally complicated religiously traumatised gf
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"I could fix her" "I could make her worse" Well I could take her to build a bear
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"race you till daybreak"
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sorry for posting wips but @ the people making mods of Rolan in romance cut scenes for their tavs: you are the real MVPs
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Astarion finished in two different overlays
couldn’t decide which one I liked more (when my Astarion post gives me negative followers 😍 I love Astarion too much tho, so it’s worth it)
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vampirism poses the question "what if there was a fundamental, horrible, unending well of want in your soul that, if truly satisfied, would lead to great pain for all those you hold closest and, in turn, their absolute and total revilement of you?" and naturally as a person with no problems I don't relate to this in any way at all.
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Adventures in Baldur's Gate 3 continue.
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