I think one thing we need to address in the US if we want to de-stigmatize multi-generational households that include ADULTS from multiple generations, is that parents need to learn how to have adult relationships with their offspring.
Should my daughter deign to live with me when she's an adult she will not be my some vassal that has to obey my household rules. She graduates into being a peer in setting and managing the boundaries, cleanliness and appearance of our home.
Too many parents want to have relationships with grown ass adults in which the parents maintain control and authority, and in which they leverage money and history to get their way from an adult who, very reasonably, wants to be able to make choices and have influence. And then those parents wonder why their kids keep their distance!
But then people act like I've lost it because I let my 5 year old pick the color of paint in her room- a room I seldom spend time in except to take care of her, and a room in which I want her to be comfortable and happy.
I'm not gonna let her choose a paint color for the kitchen right now, because she's capricious and bad at negotiating so we can pick a color we all like. But when she's an adult, if she's still living here? Why shouldn't she get to influence her environment?
People like to have agency. We limit the agency of children because they make choices without the full ability to understand the results (sorry baby, you are gonna get vaccinated for pollio even if you don't like it. You don't understand pollio).
But limiting an adults choices in their own home, just because you don't think that home should be a real home for them because it's just for you, is kind of an asshole move, to me.
No need to argue with me if you disagree. You can have your own opinion.
But I couldn't treat my kid that way, and I have seen enough to know that not every parent treats their adult children like permanently incompetent interlopers.
I didn't just buy this house for ME. I bought it for MY FAMILY. My baby is my family, and she will be no matter how old she gets.
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something important to remember is that there's always time. if you lost many years to abuse or mental illness, you will get a chance to live life on your terms. there is no limit on the age you have to be to achieve goals. you can go back to school at 30, or switch careers at 40. you can start new hobbies at any age. there is no cut off age for being happy and content. if you're trapped right now, you will get the opportunity to become who you want to be.
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step one to overcoming social anxiety is to realize that most people kind of suck and their opinion of you is literally worthless
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if completing tasks feels so good and reminds me completing tasks is easy then why is starting them the emotional equivalent of sending my first born to war
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MS paint is getting layers and transparency support. This is the single greatest art news of my life.
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the older I get, the more attractive stability becomes……………… i just want some god damn peace of mind and a non-stressful environment
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Every 21st century piece of writing advice: Make us CARE about the character from page 1! Make us empathize with them! Make them interesting and different but still relatable and likable!
Every piece of classic literature: Hi. It's me. The bland everyman whose only purpose is to tell you this story. I have no actual personality. Here's the story of the time I encountered the worst people I ever met in my life. But first, ten pages of description about the place in which I met them.
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2 genres of fanfiction:
1) put that guy into situations
2) take that guy OUT of situations for the love of GOD let them REST
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JRPGS be like, here fight this boss. you beat him? well he’s taken his shirt off so fight him again
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breaking dawn book!bella is SO FUCKING FUNNY she just wants to Fuck !!!!! like she gets married so they can fuck! she literally begs edward (who cries for a week after they have sex for the first time its literally Canon) will let them have sex again!!! shes legit abt to die bc shes CARRYING A HUMAN VAMPIRE HYBRID and is still thinkin abt boning !!!!!!!!!!! then the second shes a vampire and she sees edward shes like ‘so….. we fuckin now right?’ and everyones like ‘bella ????????????????????? go drink some blood u dumb bitch?’ like Yes technically she has like really good self control for a newborn but thats just bc her special vampire power is being really fuckin horny for edward :///////
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So I watched DA: Absolution today
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