graceloveswolves - Tumblr blog

graceloveswolves · 2 months

Note

Hey I was wondering if you still done ships? If you don't then just ignore this but I was wondering if I could get a ship with Supernatural?

Apperence: I am 5'0 tall, 120 ish lbs. I have shoulder length dark brown hair that looks black with plum highlights (basically look up blackberry colors hair on pinterest or Google and that's what I have) that's cut in this 70's or 80's female rocker shag mullet i guess just call it a wolfcut. I have pale skin with freckles and I have some stretch marks on my hips, love handles, and inner thighs. My eye color is Hazel but you can't really tell so people just thing I have light brown eyes. I have horrible vision so I have to wear glasses.

Personality: I honestly don't know what my personality is. Like I'm quiet so I come off as shy but in reality I'm really not and can actually be quite the chatterbox especially when it's a topic I am passionate about. But I really only talk to people when they talk to me first, I don't really like starting conversations. I can get really hyper and jump, dance, and sing when some music is playing that I like. I tend to make whatever I am into at the moment either it be a tv show, movie, or book my personality until I get bored and move onto the next one. I guess I have a hard time trusting people even if I known them for a long time and know that they would never hurt me especially when it comes to relationships and forms of intimacy like cuddling, kissing, ect. I don't like fighting verbal or physical but if it comes down to it I will hold my ground if I need to. I'm hard-headed and stubborn as a mule at times. But once you get to know me and gain my trust I'm pretty fun.

Likes/hobbies: I really like music almost any kind really. But my favorite is indie pop/alernative/rock and pop. I like to bake and cook. My favorite seasons are late spring and early fall when its warm but not to hot or too cold. I love to read almost everything right now I am reading The Grapes of Wrath. I really like learning about flowers especially ones that grow wild and I like to learn about different cultures too. I'm an artist so I'm drawing or painting a lot and it is not uncommon to find me with paint or pen marks on my arms and legs. My favorite color palette is pastels especially pastel purples, pinks, and blues. I really like looking at sunsets because of all the colors the sky turns.

I hope this is enough information about me! If you need more I am happy to add more.

Hello Beautiful!! I hope you are having a great day and thank you so much for the detail!! I love hearing about other people and learning all the kinds of personalities out in the world, also more detail gives me a stronger opinion and more to work with so thank you, you nailed it!

I ship you with.... Sam Winchester!

I believe Sam is the most accurate ship for you and here is why...

You remind him of his brother, in all of the good ways. Your clothing and style with your hard headed/stubbornness gives him a sense of comfort and nostalgia with his good memories of his brother.

You both have common traits. You come off as shy, but are quite passionate when talking about your passions/interests. I believe Sam is very similar in this way, he reads and studies all kinds of lore and is usually the one that finds the most information in whatever case him and Dean are working on. I believe between all the characters he is the most "shy" out of the group. (Definitely more shy then Dean in my opinion) and we see him opt to do studying/research at the motel then interviewing/bar hopping like Dean does (reasons vary because of Dean's lack of interests in research but still)

This boy has trust issues too. Like Major. But the thing with Sam is that he opts for healthy healing and talking things out right there and then when he feels a certain way or if he senses other people (mostly Dean) harboring emotions or grudges against him. He rather talk calmly and work out whatever is going on without coming off in an attacking/aggressive manner, which is mostly why I chose him for you verses the rest of the characters because in the show we see Dean bottle up his emotions/hit/throw things when he gets angry even getting physical with Sam (although he would NEVER hit his significant other) . And Castiel doesn't really know how to handle human emotions and usually asks for advice from others or mishandles the situation with good intentions. Which can be very frustrating for someone who doesn't like conflict. I believe with the exception of Jack, Sam is #1 at trying to defuse conflict.

You both like reading. Again there's common ground with you two, I can see y'all both just chilling in the impala both reading the same book, casually asking each other opinions on the characters in the book you guys are reading or occasionally checking up to see where in the book you both are at. Even making book references that has Dean internally wondering if y'all are making jabs at him or not.

Anyways, all things considered I ship y'all and I think you both would get along the most.

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graceloveswolves · 2 months

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not sure if you’re doing character ships still! but i’d be interested in a ship from the originals. 👀 my personality in three words would be sensitive, analytical, and creative. my hobbies include dancing, writing, and discovering new music. i listen to all kinds of music except country, but my favorite has got to be r&b. i am 5’5, proudly black, wear my hair in braids often. hmmm. i’ll include some flaws too: i shut down and go silent when i get upset. i weaponize my intelligence. and i’m a perfectionist who won’t do anything unless i’m sure i can get it perfect.

I am feeling active today so yes of course! I do character-ships whenever my requests are open (even if they are characters from a show/movie I am currently not writing for/taking requests on)

I ship you with.... Kol Mikaelson!

I debated between Klaus and Kol, I believe Klaus would be amused by your creative arts with dancing/writing/love for music, but I chose Kol specifically because Klaus has little/no regard for boundaries/other people's emotions (including loved ones of his). And despite Kol being the "unpredictable" brother, I believe he is quite sensitive himself, in the show we see him put on a tough act but really deep down he just wants his family to love him (and he is a hopeless romantic as we see with Davina). I believe your intelligence would spark a proud interested in him (and could probably save him from a lot of future mistakes). When Kol gets upset, he like Klaus, gets even. No matter the crime, no matter the time, he'll get you back. However, seeing someone he loves getting upset and shutting him out, I see it making him uncomfortable with himself and tracing back to every interaction you guys recently had to see what he did to upset you (assuming he didn't already know). If it was justified (which lets be honest, probably was.) then you know this man is going to pull every trick out of the book to win you back over first, if all else fails, he will apologize and respect your emotions, but at the same time do everything in his power to make it impossible for you to continue to be mad at him. He will also bring out more calmness and relaxation in your life, humor too. With him being very carefree and somewhat go with the flow as long as other's agendas don't spoil his own, he will show/remind you that not everything has to be perfect and that their is beauty in flaws. But nonetheless, he will do his best to help you perfect whatever task is at hand.

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graceloveswolves · 2 months

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Just read through your teen wolf preferences and I have to say you nail their personalities so well!! I especially like the Brett and Theo ones but your amazing writing had me reading through all of the boys!! I was wondering if your requests were open if you could do some more preferences pls n thank you, no specific request just whatever you feel comfortable writing! I’ve gotten back into my teen wolf phase since the movie is so close!!

Awwww!! Thank you! I've spent a lot of time focusing on each character's personality and their morals! I will do more in time I promise! I'll tag you in the upcoming ones.

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graceloveswolves · 2 months

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Hey I’m just a little confused about the end of trying to escape ganders Bucky barns. I was wondering what it was Steve don’t let us forget? Did we sleep with him? And why is Bucky only mad this time?

Hello!! For clarification, when Bucky realized y/n has escaped, he had sent Steve to find her (undercover) since Y/n has never met Steve before and has no idea who he looks like. Then Steve posed as a guy just trying to give her a lift out of the city, but really was taking her back to Bucky's house ( y/n lives inside the house and hasn't been outside the house except for when it was dark so y/n had no idea it was Bucky's house that Steve took y/n too) Bucky was mad because he though y/n had actually managed to escape for good, and it was the longest y/n had been away from Bucky since Bucky first grew obsessed with y/n. I hope this clears things up and thank you for reading!!

#bucky barns x y/n #yandere bucky barnes x reader #yandere #james buchanan barnes #bucky barns x reader #bucky barns imagine #bucky barnes

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graceloveswolves · 2 months

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Hey! Do you still do preferences (specifically for SPN)? I was going to request one, but I wanted to make sure that you still wrote them.

yes I do! they just have to be within my comfort zone/something I am educated on. Supernatural is my all time favorite show and I've been watching it for years so feel free to send!

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

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Attempting To Escape Yandere Bucky Barnes Would Include...

Honestly, he's probably one of the easier Yandere's to escape from.

You've escaped from him a few dozens of time.

But he's Bucky, a highly trained assassin, he finds you every.single.time.

The longest you've been away from him was a couple of hours.

He doesn't like fighting or any altercations, especially from a his love.

He is already pretty lenient on you to begin with, just trying to get you to like him so you feel better/safer with him.

And so he can stop worrying about the entire situation.

He doesn't try to intimidate you in any means, the last thing he wants is you to be terrified of him.

Although he doesn't let you push him around, he will put his foot down and let you know he is serious and that you will never be with anyone but him.

Most of the time he already knows when you plan on escaping.

The trick to escaping him would to be nice to him, act like you trust him and start warming up to him, then wait for him to let his guard down

The moment he lets you have the slightest bit of freedom, RUN.

He would be very hurt, but not surprised.

He'd obviously have no trouble finding you.

But when you put up a fight when he catches you is when he really struggles.

He'll let you hit, kick, punch, bite, spit on him all you want as he drags you away from public sight.

You can say the most vile things to him as he takes you back to your shared house, he will agree with you.

Will probably low key cry about it later when he's by himself.

No matter how much you act up, he won't punish you harshly.

Man-handling you and chaining you to a bedpost is as far as punishing goes with Bucky.

He will accept any apology, but to make sure to give you twice as much.

Still feeds you, and gives you anything you want aside from freedom.

Rinse. Repeat.

He keeps letting you try, hoping you'll eventually get tired and just accept your fate with him.

Let's you have your space and privacy, and lets you run your mouth as much as you want and vent your anger out.

It's pointless though, he never responds unless he has a valid answer.

But he notice that just makes you angrier so he keeps his comments to himself.

Sometimes he will chain you to the living room couch and make you watch movies with him.

Or when he knows he won't have any distractions, he will let you sit freely on the couch.

But obviously he sets some rules.

In order to stay unchained you have to be in the same room as him within his sight at all times or they go back on.

Pull down gates all over the house.

He'll lock the hallway gate at night and let you roam between your bedroom, his bedroom, and the bathroom.

But he secretly hopes one day you'll lay down in his with him.

If you want something sometimes you will.

Whatever it was, you'd have it the next morning.

He has no problem calling you out when he sees you snooping or trying to find ways to escape.

"You do know I'm not that stupid, right."

"You know I can see you from right here right?"

"Now why am I going to say no to that?"

"Give. It. Now."

"Now see that is exactly why you have to be chained."

"Nope. Chains going back on."

"Hey!"

Has alarms set everywhere.

Once Bucky accidentally set one off at night, disarming it instantly and went to bed, upset that he probably woke you.

He forgot to arm it again and you realized after he went to bed and got out that night.

He walked in your room with a plate of waffles the next morning and about passed out when he realized what he forgot to do.

In total denial at first.

Really thought he had lost you for good.

Had Steve and Sam help him look for you.

You had no idea what Steve looked like, so when he ran into you it didn't raise any alarms.

You just wanted to get as far away as fast as you could

so when this random guy offered you a ride out of town you were in his car in a heartbeat.

You didn't know where you were so you didn't even know he was driving you straight back to Bucky's.

Bucky's place looked a lot different at night in the pitch black.

The random dude offered you to stay at his house.

You rejected, wanting to keep moving until you were at least three states away.

He then pulled up into a driveway and roughly yanked you out of the car and into the house, nowhere as gentle as Bucky was with you.

Once he threw you in, you were actually relieved to see Bucky and have clarity that this stranger wasn't going to kill you.

"Oh thank god. Wait WHAT!"

The only time Bucky has ever yelled at you.

He felt really bad afterwards but didn't apologize.

Steve still never lets you live it down.

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

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i feel like this is such an odd request but could you do dean winchester headcanons with a fem!reader whos obsessed with anything flavored cinnamon? like cinnamon candy, lollipops, cinnamon tea (yes its a thing) anything from cinnamon gummy bears to cinnamon coffee? this is so weird but i love cinnamon 🤍

I LOVE CINNAMON AND I AM CURRENTLY DRINKING CINNAMON TEA WHILE READING THIS HAHAHA!!

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Dean Winchester Feeding Into Your Cinnamon Addiction Would Include…..

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- Buying you any candies that have cinnamon in them

- it being a little game for him, every time you stop at a gas station he tries to find a cinnamon candy you haven’t tried yet

- whenever you are mad at him, or he doesn’t come back from a hunt on time, he will come back with a box full of cinnamon treats

- him trying to get you to do the cinnamon challenge

- one time he found this cinnamon whiskey neither of you have ever seen before

- neither of you to this day remember that night

- he woke up with his face on the toilet bowl

- you woke up in the shower next to the toilet

- Sam had a bunch of photos of you guys for blackmail

- the kitchen has a drawer full of all kinds of cinnamon flavored teas

- the Impala has a little candy bag full of cinnamon candies for the road trips you take

- Sam once sat on your cinnamon candies that were in the front seat of the Impala

- melted all over his jeans 👖

- Dean and you were laughing for ages, and got a picture back for blackmail

- him and you playing guess that candy during road trips

- he personally likes red hots the best

- one time you and Sam told Dean to try this piece of “cinnamon chocolate”, it was actually ghost reaper pepper chocolate.

- and of course it was while you guys were on the road

- he pulled over to the nearest gas station and drank 3 bottles of water in the store, without even paying for them

- one time you tried to give him head after eating a bunch of cinnamon candy…

- he had to take a cold shower and scrubbed the hell out of his pee pee

- you guys making cinnamon rock candies during Christmas

- making cinnamon apple spice for him and you

- the bunker always smelling like cinnamon

- him buying you cinnamon candles, wax melts, wall plugs

- one time you bought one of those cinnamon broomsticks for decoration

- then came home to find him sweeping the bunker with it

- Sam bickering with him “DeAn! ThAts NoT wHaT iTs FoR!”

- when you don’t go on hunting trips with him he buys cinnamon air fresheners to feel closer to you since it reminds him of you

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

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are you going to finish the paul lahote series? its really good

Yes, it’s not discontinued it will just be awhile. I write by what I feel inspired sometimes I go through periods where I just lack the motivation to write for a specific project/tv show/movie and I would feel guilty to post something that wasn’t 100% my best work. But now that I have my account back I have decided I’d like to start doing oneshots (individual preferences/scenarios) for any character I have on my list available. So if you are itching for a specific character that I’m not currently writing for just request a scenario or oneshot and I’ll do my best to get to it for you!

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

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Slipping Through My Fingers

summary : Bucky and Y/N are reunited, Steve plans his next mission. Y/n and Bucky talk about martial arrangements.

Warning : 18+ Contains Sexual Content, mentions of pregnancy, unprotected sex, sex before marriage.

Slipping Through My Fingers

Chapter 1, Chapter 2,

Chapter 3 -

"What about a winter wedding?"

Bucky had suggested, sitting down next to me on his couch. He draped his arm around me as I made a list of requirements for our wedding. We had finally been able to get settled back down into our normal routine of life. After we had made it back home we were bombarded with hundreds of parties and people with all these questions about Steve, and the war and how we pulled off one of the 'greatest rescues of all time.' It had been awhile since we were by ourselves, and it felt really good to not have to answer questions about such a stressful time in my life.

"Bucky it is winter. How fast do you think we can get married?"

"Come on, it'll be cute and besides, it'll be so cold that people won't want to stay agonizingly long during the ceremony. People have had shorter and less thought out weddings before the war."

He was right. Once Pearl Harbor was attacked, people were practically getting married on the streets. No wedding dresses, or big ceremonies. Just close family members and a pastor, 'war weddings' is what they were calling it, but everyone knew it was because they wanted to be able to have children before their loved ones went and died in war, the men wanting to leave behind a bloodline and legacy in case they didn't come back. Which In their defense was a great possibility.

"I guess winter isn't bad, a white wedding would be beautiful."

I wrote down winter with a question mark by it, as I thought about who would actually be invited to the wedding.

"I want a small wedding."

"Me too."

"Okay, and where do you want to get married at?"

l looked up to him and noticing he was staring directly at my chest in a fascinated way. It was obvious that he was checking me out, he had done so many times in our relationship, but ever since he had been back from battle he had been a lot more handsy and started to talk about being more intimate.

"Hey! Eyes up here, this is the most important question."

"I will marry you in Steve's back yard. I don't care where we get married. I just want you to be happy."

I frowned slightly, and would be lying if I said I didn't feel a little irked with his lack of ideas.

"How about we get married tonight and not tell anyone?"

"Sounds good to me."

"Bucky. I was joking..."

"If that is what you want, that is what we will do. I will have Steve grab the pastor and we can be Mr and Mrs by the end of the night."

"I almost believe that is exactly what you want."

"I want a happy wife. If that means giving you my last name in a few hours, it's all yours."

I crumbled up my list and looked over at him as he gave me a sly grin, his eyes daring me, waiting for me to throw the paper at him. Which I did, and he easily deflected it with a swift swipe of his hand. I gave him a sassy eye roll before laying my head down in his lap and propping my feet up on the opposite end of the couch.

It was almost surreal, finally being able to marry Bucky after knowing him since I was born. Our parents were good friends, and had always talked out Bucky and I being each other's guardian angels. I guess to a certain extent, they were right. If only they could be here to see our story, to be here and see us actually get married.

Bucky instantly had started playing with my hair, sitting in comfortable silence as he gazed down at my face with a rather sad frown on his face.

"I thought I was never going to see my girl again."

I did too. I thought I would never see him again when that soldier gave me the photo of me. It was the worst pain I have ever felt, and I never wanted to feel that way ever again. I knew it must've been much harder on him, more scary, and I didn't pry or make him open up about his time in the war. This was actually the first time he had brought up being captured.

Grabbing his hand and bringing it to my lips, I pressed a soft kiss to his hand, hoping it provided some sort of comfort. He had looked down at me, resting his hand on the soft flesh on my chest, right below the two rings he had given me.

"I'm right here. And I'm not letting you leave my side ever again, so I hope you've had enough 'me time' because I'm going to be by your side all the way through death. You'll be begging for your own space in no time."

He scoffed smiling, shaking his head as a protest.

"I definitely do not want my own space right now. I want the least amount of space possible."

"Bucky!" His lap had shifted as I felt something rather stiff grow hard under my lower shoulder.

"I thought I was going to die without ever having sex. It suddenly made me realize why everyone was telling me to marry you before I went to war."

"You're the one who wanted to wait until after marriage, AND after your deployment, that fear was brought on upon yourself."

"Well we can scratch deployment off the list and we are pretty much married. Do you still feel that way?"

"Bucky, if I get pregnant before we are married people are going to know. They aren't stupid."

"What, do you really think anyone is going to notice a few weeks difference?"

"That depends if we actually get married in a few weeks."

"I can have it arranged."

Laughing at his determination, I rose up from his lap and stared at him for a few moments studying him, wondering if he was being serious or not. Having sex before marriage wasn't my main concern, it wasn't even a concern at all for me. It was me becoming with child and then him leaving for war, or a mission Steve had planned. Well, more so him not coming back from said war or mission, which would leave me husbandless and my child fatherless, which a fate I would not suffer onto my child.

No matter how noble my husband was to his country, he was going to be a present figure in my child's life. It was the only thing I've ever wanted since I was a little girl, was to have a family, not a broken one.

"Are you going with Steve on his mission? Next week?"

The silence between us had dragged out, staring at me without an answer to give in my favor, he had answered the question we both knew the answer to.

"Then we wait until marriage. Those are my terms, I'm done having this conversation." "Since when are you the one that wants to wait before marriage?"

"It's not until marriage, it's until you decide to stop putting your life on the line. If you can guarantee sex without child then we can, but we both know that's not how it works."

"Babe, come on."

“I promised. I promised my mother I wouldn’t make the same mistake as her. You know better then anyone what my family went through without a father. He had the same conversation with my mother. ‘I’ll come back’ that’s what he told my mother. And he didn’t. I love you Bucky, more then I have loved anyone in my life, but that was a promise I will never break.”

Suddenly feeling upset and angry, I stood up from the couch with every intent to walk out and take a walk to calm myself down. It was frustrating, dealing with Bucky's constant need to leave my side to go fight one battle to the next. He had just gotten back from a near death experience and he has already decided he is ready to get back on the horse and sacrifice our future again all in the name of 'fighting next to his best friend Steve'.

"I just got you back Bucky, and here you are trying to toss our future back into the wind, everything we worked so hard for!"

"Y/n, please don't."

"Don't what? You're the one who's already made the decision."

"I'm still here with you, I haven't gone anywhere."

"No, but you plan on leaving again. Do you really want to have a family with me or not?"

"Do you really want Steve to go back out there by himself? He came back for me-"

"Yeah I did too Bucky! I was right with him, gosh I can't even believe you seriously are letting me talk about marriage and family right now when you have every intent of leaving right after!"

"Who said anything about not being here? I will come back just like I did last time, babe- please."

He reached out, grabbing me by my arm and pulling me, forcing me to sit back onto the couch with him.

"This is not going to be like the last time. Steve will be with me, and it won't be more then a week. After this I promise, I'll be right there with you and we will be married, no more missions, because I can not wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

"Then we wait. I'm not rushing a marriage or a relationship with you, I've known you for too long, if you make me wait then I make you wait."

Noticing that he was only putting me in more distress, he had nodded his head to my decision, surrending the conversation. He had left it at that, letting my arm go as I settled down on the opposite end of the couch from him. I had made sure to huff out in annoyance loud enough for him to hear. The audacity of that man...

As much as Bucky talked about marriage and family, I knew deep down he wasn't ready to commit to my needs. He still felt the need to go out into the world and be a hero, to be at Steve's beck and call no matter what it meant. Steve was also our best friend since childhood, and I knew he meant no harm and did not want to interfere with my relationship.

But recently he had been interfering more than he ever had before. Although, it wouldn't be fair to blame Steve for Bucky's decisions, if Bucky wasn't ready to commit to my terms then he would have to wait for me to commit to his intimate terms. Knowing the kind of man Bucky was, it was practically basic knowledge he would respect my decisions and find the patience to control himself like he has for years now, a few more months won't kill him.

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"What about the night before I leave?"

"Ha... you're funny."

"What about the night I get back?"

"I don't see why not."

"Really?"

"No."

"Why not? Your terms where after my mission, how is that violating them?"

"Steve will have more missions, and you can't seem to say no to him. You'll find another mission that you just have to be apart of while I sit at home pregnant and scared every second wondering if I'll be doing everything alone by myself."

"What if I promise this will be the last time I go?"

"Will it?"

"You're lack of understanding my love for you and our future together hurts you know."

"That is a door that swings both ways love."

"Okay, so you don't want to have sex with me because you think I won't come back from my mission. Is that the problem here?"

"Precisely."

"Then I guess you just have to come with me then. You can see to it that we both come back while we start a family."

"You would really let me go with you?"

"You flew over to fight the nazis to save me from Hitler, I don't see why this would be any harder."

"Yeah, I bet the men would just love to have a woman abetting in their mission."

"They can answer to Steve and I if they have a problem with it. He is the one leading the force."

Raising an eyebrow, I considered his proposal, there was no way he was being serious about taking a woman to fight in a mission with men. Steve wouldn't allow it, he barely allowed me getting on the plane with him. I couldn't imagine how he'd feel taking me with Bucky just so I could keep tabs on them. I mean what would I even do, I didn't have the first clue as to fight in battle let alone be in one.

But it would definitely give me more comfort being offered the chance to make sure he was safe and if any harm were to come his way, or the chance to die with him so I wouldn't have to worry about being alone with the pain of his absence for all eternity.

It was quite the offer, one that no other woman would ever get from their lovers. But then again, I had no parents or siblings to stop me. It was always Bucky and I against the world after our parents had passed away. It is what made us so perfect together, we had the same wounds ever since we were children.

"If you let me come with you on your mission then you have yourself a deal."

Bucky smiled, putting his arm back around me and attacking my neck, playfully leaving tiny love bites as we both playfully yelled out at each other.

“You have to be by my side at ALL times. And you must do what I say.”

“Of course.”

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

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Slipping Through My Fingers

summary: Y/N finds out Bucky's infantry is back, and Bucky is not with the remaining soldiers

Slipping Through My Fingers

Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3,

Chapter 2 -

Here it had been, Bucky had been shipped overseas and I was, alone. With Steve, who had been apart of some experimental project and was now two feet taller and sixty pounds heavier. It was quite interesting, seeing your tiny best friend grow so fast because of a project you were not allowed to be informed on. "Captain America" they call him now. It was concerning at first, and I tried to talk him out of it at first, but after a few visits I realized this was the best thing that could've happened to him.

He had gotten everything he wanted...

And here I was the exact opposite... alone. With two pieces of metal and a future that isn't guaranteed. Just waiting helplessly as the love of my life fought in a war while my best friend got everything he ever wanted. In Steve's defense, he had stayed true to Bucky's word and forced me to go with him to all his "Captain America" rehearsals, making sure I was in his reaches of protection. He even introduced me to Penny. I was quite fond of her, she was perfect for Steve, and I could tell they were very interested in each other.

I couldn't wait to tell Bucky about it.

But that was the worst thing about it all, having to wait. I had no one, Bucky and I would talk endlessly, and I would have countless conversations with him and now I still wasn't used to him being gone. I will turn to go to tell Bucky something and then remember he was thousands of miles away. Oceans away, and I didn't even know if he was alive or dead.

There had been speculations of "Y/N being Captain America's 'secret lover' "which was beyond disgusting and I had hoped Bucky wouldn't get word of it when he came back. Intimate relationships before marriage were nothing short of a scandal, and I did not want to suffer the consequences of such a rumor. So I had stopped attending his rehearsals backstage and began to sit in the crowd instead.

Which leads me here, today was yet another "Captain America" show, and I had been sitting a few rows back from the stage, surrounded by a bunch of men. This crowd was different from the rest, it had contained soldiers from an infantry. I am assuming this show was to encourage them.

However, even as Steve had been speaking it was dead silent, you could hear a feather drop. It could have either cause of fear or hatred, and I could not blame them for being silent. I'd too be quiet, if I knew I was marching to death and had to listen to a man wearing tights pretend to fight as well. I watched as Steve was on stage, looking discouraged by the lack of applause from the crowd.

I did feel bad for Steve, this crowd had not been as welcoming as the others. They had been insulting him even before he could get through his speech. And even tossed a few vegetables onto the stage in hopes of hitting him.

"Excuse me ma'am.."

I felt someone touch my shoulder, and I turned around and was met with a soldier that I have never seen before. He had looked fairly dirty, and smelt of sweat. I half expected him to start harassing me, wondering where my husband was. It wasn't normal for women my age to be out alone without a spouse.

But he hadn't said a word at all, he had just stared at me for a moment, before looking back down at his hands. I immediately realized by the sorrow he held in his face, that he was not trying to harass me as a few of these soldiers had already done today.

"You wouldn't happen to be Mrs. Barnes would you?"

My eyes had widened in shock at the question, wondering if I had heard him correctly. How the hell did this soldier know about me or my fiancé... I had peered around at the men in the crowd and realizing that these people had all looked dirty and sweaty, like they have been through a war. Looking back at the fellow soldier, he had extended his hand out with a piece of paper in between his muddy fingers.

"I'm sorry do I know you sir?"

As I had questioned the stranger, I had realized that the piece of paper he was holding out was actually a faded picture. I stared at it for a few seconds before deciding to grab it, but still careful to not take my eyes off the strange man in front of me. Just by looking at him I knew that I did not know this man nor have I ever seen him in my life.

What could this soldier want with me? And what is so important about me receiving this picture? And how did he know about Bucky? All these thoughts had rushed through my head as I stared at this man.

"He told me he had a wife waiting back at home. Couldn't believe it when I actually saw you… he had dropped this while we were covering each other back in the war. I thought you would have wanted it. And I’m sorry for your loss.”

Before I could fully register what he was saying to me he quickly dispersed back into the crowd of dirty men before I could even respond back. Staring down at the picture it had all clicked together and I could've swore I had felt my heart drop to my feet and stop beating.

It was me.

~~~

"STEVE! STEVE!"

I had yelled out, running as fast as my legs could take me. He was no longer on stage and my vision was blurred from my tears, my lungs had burned, and I could only see Bucky's face. The sweat and tears had stung my eyes as I pushed my way through all these men. Despite my lack of vision, I had kept running, bumping into men twice my size.

"Please, please no, no."

"Y/N! Y/n what's wrong?"

I couldn't see him but I felt his grip on me as I bawled, falling straight on the ground and not able to catch my breath as my lungs had burned and my heart had ached.

"He's gone- HE'S GONE."

I had thrown up the photo I was given up to Steve, not even seeing if he was even looking at it. I felt him grab my wrist, lifting me up off the ground with his single hand, and embracing me in a hug.

"T-That was his infantry. Bucky. My Bucky."

I had sobbed in between breaths, not able to process the words Steve had been whispering in my ear. The only thing I could think of was him and I, in the alley as he had handed me our rings. His sweet face, whispering "Only a stupid man would leave such a beautiful girl behind." We would never be seen in our wedding outfits waiting to be married. And it would never happen, he was gone. And my heart had felt frozen inside my chest, sinking down.

"I'll speak with Penny, we will get the truth. I promise. I promise. Look at me."

Steve grabbed my face gently, as my tears soaked his hand he spoke softly. It was hard to hear him, it was loud and it was then had I noticed my ears were ringing. And suddenly wondered if I had hit my head on the ground when I fell. I looked down at the picture in my hands and the ringing had started to faded quietly as Steve kept talking incoherent words to me.

"He's not dead. Okay? He can't be. We will find out where he is. He's gonna okay Y/n."

"Okay?"

He repeated, giving me a shake as he tore a piece of his costume off to wipe my face dry. The world has started to slow down and I could start seeing more clear, and I had looked up at him for the first time. He was in his uniform and he had tomato sauce all over him.

"We will find him."

"Colonel Philps!"

Steve yelled as he approached this balding man in the rain. Both Steve, Penny and I had all been covered in the rain as we marched over for answers about Bucky's whereabouts.

"Well if it ain't the star spangled man with a plan, what is your plan today?"

"I need the casualty list from Azzano."

"You don't get to give me orders, son."

"Please sir,"

I had interjected, looking down at the man who seemed very insulted by Steve's presence.

"I just need one name, one name sir, Sergeant James Barnes from the 107th infantry. Please, he's my fiancé. I have to know what happened, please."

I had begged, lips quivering from the cold as the raindrops fell from my hair down to my face, doubling as tears. This man obviously did not respect Steve, but most men do have respect for "Spoken for" women, especially women who were married to soldiers. The older man did seem to forgotten Steve's presence for just a moment.

"Please, I have to know if he is alive. Its B-A-R-"

"I can spell!"

The Colonel interrupted Steve, looking back at Penny with a look of fury.

"You and I are going to have a conversation that you won't enjoy!"

The threat had set all four of us in an awkward pause of silence, the Colonel took another glance at me, as I had been shaking and holding onto my rain soaked coat, praying that he would be kind enough to give me any sort of hope that Bucky was alive. By the look on his face he looked like he would crack.

"I have signed more of these condolence letters today then I would care to count. But, the name does sound familiar. I'm sorry ma'am."

"What about the others? Are you planning a rescue mission?

"Yeah it called winning the war!"

"But if you know where they are why not at least-"

"They're thirty miles behind the lines, through some of the most heavily fortified territory in Europe. We'd lose more men than we'd save, but I don't expect you to understand that because you're a chorus girl."

The Colonel and Steve argued back and forth as Penny and I watched them go at it. She had silently offered her jacket to me, to which I had denied with the shake of my head.

"I think I understand just fine."

"Well understand it somewhere else. If I read the posters correctly you and Miss Barnes got someplace to be in 30 minutes."

The Colonel walked off, revealing a map that had the infantry's location and where they had been taken. I studied the American flag that had to have been where Bucky's crew had been hostage. Looking at it, I felt a shadow of hope that Bucky would still be alive. I don't care if I had to hijack a plane and walk 30 miles myself, I was going to find my love. I'd rather die trying than die alone, and looking over at Steve I nodded my head, letting him know that I was not backing down from finding Bucky.

~~~~

About 2 hours later, I was on a plane with Steve, Howard Stark, and Penny making our way to Austria. Much against Penny's word, which I tried not to take much offense to her protests, I knew it had nothing against me and everything against Steve's safety. And in a way, I was grateful for her worry for Steve's safety.

Penny and Steve were going over the map and terrain as I studied along, making sure to memorize every location Bucky could be.

"Just get me as close as you can!" Steve yelled up at Stark, and I felt my anxiety raise. I hope he didn't think he was going on this trip alone, I'd be damned if I let my best friend go on a death mission to save my husband-to-be all alone. I started staring at the parachute behind Steve, maybe if I sat close enough to it I could take it when Stark says go. Then Steve would have to take me, or I could just refuse to stay on the plane. Before I could mention my tagging along, Steve had already interjected to Penny and I.

"You two are going to be in a lot of trouble when you land."

"And you won't?" Penny sassed back at him.

"Where I'm going if anybody yells at me I can just shoot them."

"They will undoubtedly shoot back."

"Agent Carter!" Stark had interrupted the couples bickering from the front of the plane before suggesting that him and her go out to eat for some fondue after the mission is done.

I smiled chuckling to myself at Stark's cocky personality, before pointing Steve playfully who looked jealous as he could be. Penny looked at Steve, and then at me, hoping we'd somehow not have heard Stark, to which I raised my eyebrows at her jokingly. She looked away, blushing out of embarrassment.

"Stark is the best civilian pilot I've ever seen. He's mad enough to brave this airspace, we're lucky to have him."

Penny defended herself, trying to smooth over Stark's invitation.

"So are you two fonduing or just friends?" I asked the impossible question Steve was too scared to ask. Steve turned bright red as he glared at me, but choosing to stay silent and turned to Penny, waiting for a response.

Penny changed the subject and handed Steve a transponder, telling him to activate it when he was ready.

"Woah!" Penny yelled out as we all were jerked by the plane's sudden change in direction. Following the gasps from everyone, were gun shots, and bullets hitting the plane at a rapid speed. Steve got up and I followed him.

We must've been getting close, and I was not going to get off this plane without knowing if Bucky was dead or alive.

"Its now or never and I'm going with you!" I said to Steve, grabbing the parachute next to him and following him towards the door.

"What? Y/n no you stay with Penny, I promised Bucky I would keep you safe!"

" Too Bad! If the roles were reversed don't act like you wouldn't go too!"

"No but Y/N he's my friend-"

"AND HE'S MY FIANCE!"

"There's no time you guys have to go now!"

Penny interjected, strapping my parachute straps on as I struggled to get my parachute on correctly, I thanked her for her support and then looked at the ground of the airplane.

"There's only one parachute!" Steve exclaimed as he looked back at me and then the ground.

"Looks like you are free falling buddy! Are you going first or shall I?!" I yelled over the raining bullets ricocheting off the airplane.

"Steve be careful!"

Steve admitted defeat and crouched to the exit of the airplane and took one last look at Penny.

"As soon as I'm clear you turn this thing around and get the hell out of here!"

Then he jumped down out into the raining bullets and I gave Penny one last glance.

"I'll protect him! I promise! Thank you for everything!"

I looked down at the pitch black bottom with the orange sparks of bullets flying through the air. I grabbed onto my necklace, feeling the two cold bands mesh into my skin.

Then off I jumped and was immediately greeted with pure terror as I realized what I had just done all in the name of love.

As we landed I had taken a moment of breath, adrenaline pumping through my veins as I crawled out of my parachute and made my way over to Steve who had as I thought, survived the fall in one piece.

"How are you? You okay?"

Steve looked over me for any sorts of bullet holes or scratches, as I still stood barely being able to hear him over the sound of my heartbeat in my ears.

"Aside from the piss-your-pants-terror? Awesome. Now let's go save some soldiers Captain America."

We had ended up in a truck, as I watched Steve beat some nazi's unconscious and tried my best to keep up with him as we sprinted through their camp and into an armed building. With good stealth and pure adrenaline, we made it to the prison cells, filled with American soldiers. As Steve commuted with the soldiers I scanned every face, waiting to hear Bucky's voice pop up before I could find him.

"Isn't that Sarg's woman? How the hell she get here?"

"I'm Captain America, she is my friend."

"I beg your pardon?" The confused prisoner questioned, looking up at Steve and I.

"Where is he? James Barnes? Has anyone seen him?" I asked, as I freed the prisoners, my doubts had started to arise and I started to panic. I did not come this far to go back without James. And I would not be leaving without him.

"There's an isolation ward in the factory, but no one's ever come back from it." A solider explained as he walked out of his holding cell, looking down at me and Steve. Steve explained to all the soldiers where to go and where to meet us at after we had looked for Bucky.

"Do you really think we will find him?"

I panted out as I sprinted with Steve down the halls of the building, anxiety raising in my chest.

"What if its too late, what if we find him and he's-"

"It's Bucky. If all those men survived then he did too."

Steve reassured as we took a turn down the hall and heard mumbling from the empty rooms.

Without hesitation I sprinted past Steve and into the room where the mumbling got louder and I practically cried out when I saw him strapped down on a table.

"Bucky!"

I ran over to him, pulling at the straps as hard as I could without hurting him.

"Oh my god Bucky, I found you. I found you!"

He looked up at me, disoriented but still noticing that I was there with him, as Steve had worked the straps and had them off with a single swift motion with his new and improves serum strength.

"It's me, Y/n, I'm here, you're okay!"

I exclaimed, more to myself than to him. He had looked pale, and dirty like he had been tortured but there wasn't any signs of blood on him, thank god. He looked up at me, confusion on his face being washed away with happiness.

"Y/N.." He had crawled up and I had helped him stand up, letting him rest his weight on Steve and I.

"I thought you were dead."

I cupped his face, pressing my lips on his as if I'd never get to kiss him again. He wore a goofy little grin on his face as I pulled away from him, letting him try and support himself on his own. He then, looked over at Steve in surprise, eyeing him up and down in shock.

"I thought he was smaller."

We all snickered at his surprise as he kept asking questions to Steve.

"Come on let's get you out of here.."

I urged, as I let Bucky balance himself on me as we all started to get out of the room.

"What is she doing here Steve? What happened to you?"

"I joined the army and she wasn't taking no as an answer."

"Did it hurt?"

"A little."

"Is it permanent?"

"So far."

"How'd she get here?"

"She jumped off a plane."

"You let her do that?"

"I wasn't letting him keep me from getting my husband back. Besides, we have a wedding to plan."

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graceloveswolves · 7 months

Text

Slipping Through My Fingers

summary: Y/n was Bucky's late girlfriend, Bucky gets drafted into the war.

Slipping Through My Fingers

Chapter 2 , Chapter 3,

Chapter 1 -

"Come on babe, you knew this was going to happen. We talked about this!"

Bucky reached out to grab the papers from my hand as I stared in absolute terror. As shocked as I was looking at his draft notice, he was right, I shouldn't have been surprised. Everyone knew war was coming, and it was coming fast. Ever since the recent bombings on Pearl Harbor, all Bucky and Steve has talked about was enlisting into the army and fighting back. But it was just talk, this was a paper that had made it real. James B. Barnes was going off to war, and there was a chance he would not be coming back.

and he had no choice.

"This is war James, men die slow and bloody, and you've just been drafted into it. How would you want me to feel?"

Looking up at him as I stood in this empty alley, I saw the little boy I grew up with. The man I fell in love with, the one I wanted to marry and have children with. The man I spent my mornings and nights with, and now he is being taken from me. Certainly he had to have felt some kind of fear, even though it had been perfectly normal for men to go to war and give their lives for the country...

Why did it have to be my Bucky?

There were plenty of bad men in this world, why did they have to draft such a bright handsome man like Bucky...

I felt scared for him, I wanted to take him into our house and just keep him there forever. To hell with the bloody war, they can find someone else to take. Find another man that wasn't as good hearted and respectable. But Bucky was right, it wouldn't have been right to take that from him. This was what Bucky wanted and no man or woman could talk him out of it. I would have to let him go, live days without him, only being able to write to him. Warm tears rolled down my face at the thought of him leaving, and without a beat I felt his hand reach up and wipe them away.

"Who will wipe my tears when you are gone?"

I whispered as I smiled through the pain, I met his beautiful eyes. He was smiling back, as always, not letting his hand fall from my face.

"I'm sure Steve would be happy too. I told him to protect my girl while I was gone."

Short laughs were exchanged between us, Bucky always knew how to get my laugh when I was upset, and the thought of Steve protecting me was humorous. He was the sweetest guy, but I had good foot and twenty pounds on him. Though I have no doubt that he would have been there in a heartbeat to wipe my tears as well. He wasn't Bucky, and there was no man that I wanted to be with other than Bucky. If Bucky were to have died in this war, I'd have to die myself. I couldn't bear living without my best friend, my man.

"You have to come back to me, it is an order. I couldn't live my life with you missing from me." I sniffled, reaching into him as he held me in his arms. I closed my eyes and relished the feeling of him, hoping the war would pass swiftly and I could have Bucky back and start our lives together as a family.

But we both knew that this was a terrifying beginning to a very long battle and also the end of the Bucky I was embracing. The light hearted boy I knew would no longer be the same. Once the war takes him from me, it will change him, and if he comes back it, it will be as a different man.

"I will love you no matter what,"

I paused, holding his face in my hands as he looked down at me.

"You will always be my Bucky, until the end of time."

Bucky smiled down and pressed his lips against mine, taking his hands to mine and guiding them to his shoulders as he rested one of his hands respectfully, on my back and the other was fumbling in his pocket. "I love you too, and you know it will be awhile before I see my girl again. So... while I am gone I wanted to give you this..."

He took a step back, revealing a necklace. But with a closer look, there was two single banded rings attached to it.

"I want you to think about what our wedding will be like. Write me your ideas, but Steve has to be the best man. My only condition."

He smiled as he held the necklace up for me to see. His proud eyes glimmering in front of me. I reached out and let the rings rest in my hand in front of me. The rings were easily recognized as his mother and father's two gold banded rings.

"That seems fair enough. " I had responded to his condition, feeling even more excited for him to come back so we could start the next chapter in our lives.

"I thought you had said your parents were buried with their rings."

"What can I say? I'm good at keeping surprises."

Bucky lightly joked, unchaining the necklace and reaching over my head, gently putting the necklace around my neck. He took one final look at me, and I looked back down at the rings that rested over my chest.

"Perfect,"

He crept over to me and pushed a piece of hair behind my ear. "They will look even better on our fingers, but first I have to go, but I don't want you to worry about me. Only a stupid man would leave such a beautiful girl behind."

I laughed softly, soaking up every single second with my future husband to be.

He took my hand and we intertwined our fingers, raising them up in between us as we stared at each other.

"Don't let me slip from your fingers." I warned, glancing from our hands back up to him with a stern look.

He pressed one kiss to my hand, grinning.

"Never."

~~~~~~~

Chapter 2-,

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