firerubyjam
馃拫girlboss馃拫
馃槝just give me money馃槝
馃崚text me馃崚
gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss
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mid autumn
Age: 21
Hair: long but not as muchas they used to be
Weight: 60.2 kg
Close friends: 3
Bestie: nobody
Last time I cried: I don't remeber, proud of me
Bank account: got a job and got fired very soon, still miserable
What I like about myself: nothing
What I don't like: everything from the way I look to the way I move my body, I'm so awkward all the time
Current reading: 22.11.63, mary poppins, radio silence
Current fanfic: ATYD the war
Goals: pass all my exams, be brave and leave my town and home
Worried about: college, climate change, being broke and can't afford basic needs
Excited about: my books... that's so pathetic, just not really into anything
Happiness: 3/10
Confidence: 2/10. why can't I be like my friends?
Mental situation: bad, I hate myself and everything. I feel left out from my friends, I feel like the last weel of the wagon, I feel so immature and childish respect people of my age. I alway think about having a glow up but actually never do anything to make it hapens. I also feel very stupid, very ugly. I cover this situation by isolating myself and my mind tricks me I always feel so shitty and I doubting myself constantly.
Love life: by my own
Wish: please universe send me an angel, a patient one with a dazzling light one that finally sees and make me their mate, because right now I'm invisible by my own eyes too. I just want to be heard and loved, like I do with other people.
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I will always be James and never Regulus
I will always be Sirius and never Remus
I will always be the obsessed one, never the obsessed over
#atyd marauders#atyd wolfstar#atyd james#atyd remus#atyd sirius#atyd#choices#jegulus#jemes x regulus
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Always an angel never a God
Always the writer never the muse
Always the medicine never the cure
Always the lover never the loved
Always a choice never the chosen
Always a distraction never a solution
Always smart never gifted
Always trying never enough
Always good never great
#night thoughts#i am alone#i love you#deep thoughts#i love her#quotes#i love him#deep thots#poetry#relationship
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Beginning of summer
Age: 21
Hair: still long
Weight: 61.5 kg
Close friends: 3
Bestie: nobody
Last time I cried: yesterday
Bank account: I'm still not rich, and I haven't found a job
What I like about myself: my eyes color
What I don't like: my body I feel fat
Current reading: 22.11.63
Current fanfic: ATYD 7
Goals: pass all my exams
Worried about: college
Excited about: summer is coming
Happiness: 6,5/10
Confidence: 4/10. I broke all my promises and I'm the only person to accuse.
Mental situation: high and low, sometimes I feel shitty, not the best in general
Love life: peacefully single
Favourite actor: Mr. Gorgeous aka Timothee Chalamet
Last movie seen: Dear Evan Hansen 10/10
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I love being a woman but I am so sick of everything. It's not a gender crisis but more the delusion of living in a world like this.
I don't want to be pretty, I don't want to be your toy, I don't want to be perceived at all.
I want peace, I want to be safe, I want to be free like a man is.
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Close the windows that hurt you, no matter how beautiful the view is
#night thoughts#i love you#deep thoughts#i am alone#quotes#poetry#i love her#deep thots#i love him#relationship#love healing#healingjourney#love heals#healing#self healing
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I hope you get everything you've ever wanted, and I hope I never hear a thing about it
#night thoughts#i am alone#poetry#deep thoughts#i love her#quotes#i love him#i love you#deep thots#relationship#breakup#breakup relation
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A baby cannot hate the mother, without the mother first hate their baby
#i am alone#night thoughts#i love you#deep thoughts#quotes#deep thots#mommy issues#daddy issues#toxic people#toxic mother#toxic mom#child health#childhood trauma#trauama#bpd problems
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I'm so glad we live at the same time. My world is a bit lighter with you in it.
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Remember: if they ever come back to you doesn't mean they care about you, it means that nobody cared about them as much as you did
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I am now older than Lil Peep. Even if I never met him, I like to think he was a good soul cause he cured mine. I love you Gus, you were just a guy in a word too cruel, RIP
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I don't wanna heal. The pain is the last link to what we lost
#night thoughts#i am alone#poetry#i love you#deep thoughts#i love her#deep thots#relationship#i love him#quotes#love healing#self healing#love heals#healing
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They only miss you when they fail to replace you
#night thoughts#i am alone#i love you#deep thoughts#i love her#i love him#quotes#deep thots#relationship#poetry#healingjourney#love heals
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My biggest fear is not truly knowing what's wrong with me
#i am alone#night thoughts#deep thoughts#i love her#i love you#poetry#i love him#relationship#deep thots#quotes
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