It makes me happy when they listen

one of my fave things about spiders is how they walk. theyre so thoughful and melodical about every step and i think thats really cute. they pause when they're unsure and approach everything with this poise about them.

from the perspective of my engineering degree, its also really cool how they move their legs using hydraulics of their own haemolymph (bug blood).

they also have little toe beans. thats also great.

hehehghsh look at them

Honeytraps do not work on French spies because their wives are used to them having affairs, a television documentary about France’s equivalent of MI6 has revealed. [...] The agent known only as Nicolas, whose voice and face were blurred, says: “Defectors from the Soviet Union used to talk about the ‘French paradox’, namely if you surprised a Frenchman with a mistress by telling him, we’ve caught you red-handed with a 22-year-old called Tatyana, work for us or we’ll tell your wife, it didn’t work. “That was because he generally said: ‘Go ahead, show her, she’ll understand,’ or ‘she already knows about it’.”

(x)

my one skill is expertly manipulating the shape of the eggs I’m cooking so that they fit perfectly onto my toast every time

I ATE A BIG BAG OF FACTORY REJECT SEEDS UNTIL A HEALTHY FLOWER UNFURLED IN MY CHEST ...

I MISTOOK THE SENSATION FOR LOVE AND DIED.

Vintage style, an ongoing series (Cigarette case and matching lipstick bullet made of inlaid turquoise, lapis lazuli, diamonds, cut sapphires and gold, country unknown, 1929)

As a kid, when your parents are poor, you're poor. If they don't have money, that means none of you have money. But if someone's parents are rich, that doesn't necessarily mean the kid is. Sometimes rich peoples' kids aren't rich kids, they're just some rich freak's exotic pets that can talk but aren't allowed to.

90% of sufferers quit right before they figure out how to give their suffering meaning

you sit down at the plastic table because your partner likes being outside at the bar even though it’s 90 degrees and 60% humidity at 10pm and you thought this corduroy dress was soooo cute but now youre all sweaty and so one of your balls has escaped your panties but youre wearing fishnets so your loose nut is now dying like a sea turtle in a six pack ring and youre the desperate diver trying to save it but blind and one handed and stone faced cause you can’t draw attention to the fact that youre doing a high stakes wildlife rescue on your stupid scrotum in public because it might turn into a six month news cycle and desantis might fly out to personally bulldoze the bar. and its a thursday

WRIOTHESLEY in "The Time Has Yet to Come"

MORE WRIOTHESLEY AND ARLECCHINO PARALLELS THEYRE LITERALLY TWO SIDES OF THE SAME COIN HYV PLEASE LET THEM INTERACT IM BEGGING YOU

THEYRE BOTH ORPHANS

THEY BOTH HAD SHIT FOSTER PARENTS

THEY BOTH KILLED THEIR PARENTS AND SAVED THEIR SIBLINGS IN A WAY

THEY BOTH RUN AN FACTION FOR THE ABANDONED AND FORGOTTEN

THEYRE BOTH PURSUE THEIR AGENDA WITH QUESTIONABLE MEANS

THEY BOTH LIFTED A MAN BY THEIR THROAT

This isnt even about shipping them fack that just they. NEED. TO. TALK.

party beetle

do you ever hear people talking about something and you’re like. fuck. let me be real for a second. i’m too much of a commie to have this conversation