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This is huge. I hope the US takes notice.
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“How dare you not give me exactly what I want and instead offer a reasonable solution to my crippling pain?”
For the record, estrogen cream only sometimes works, and according to the testimonies I’ve read, its effectiveness can become null over time. Truly the only sure way to reverse vaginal atrophy is to stop testosterone. But “dysphoria” prevents this patient from reclaiming the healthy body she was born with.
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Uh was that what the hospital typed into their records? (I’m not in the medical field so genuine question.)
Bc if so, the hospital isn’t recording the fact you had a complication, which is pretty important. What if every trans person who comes in with a complication isn’t being recorded as having a complication? What does that say about complication rates that are thrown around online? Is it not worrying that the hospital could be covering up the nature of their patients’ conditions??
so i recently got top surgery and this was on my discharge papers after a mild complication
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Lie to your doctor when you're asking for HRT. Tell then you've had dysphoria for years even if you haven't, tell then you're a trans woman/trans man even if your gender is more complex than that.
Tell them everything they need to know to prescribe HRT and nothing else.
Your case and claims will be picked apart and examined under a microscope, looking for any reason to say no. So tell them exactly what they need to hear to say yes.
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We joke about women being methodical about our diets like Hannibal Lecter or our appearance like Patrick Bateman, but I really think women are approaching serial killer levels of objectification. Every post/video about skincare, dieting or plastic surgery feels like those creepy scenes in movies created to show how unbalanced and obsessive a serial killer is. Except with women, the victim being sexualized, objectified, abused and killed is herself. She is the perpetrator and the victim. She is drawing the lines on her own body to be butchered like she is a prime cut of meat. She is cannibalizing herself and casting the undesirable parts aside. She is caging, beating and depriving herself. The "Internalized male gaze" has morphed into the internalized serial killer.
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talking to certain trans people is so sad sometimes, it's almost like talking to an addict. all they care about is the next hrt shot, or the next surgery, or how they look or how they present, and they don't care at all how they're affecting other people in their life, and how they're hurting them.
i've heard multiple trans-identified females say that their parents told them "you killed my daughter." and it's heart-wrenching, and I used to really feel for this woman. but now, I can't help but feel for the parents. Imagine having a daughter who's perfectly normal until her life is overtaken by heroin. Imagine having a daughter who was fine until she joined a new religious group that turned out to be a cult, and now she's not the same anymore and has been completely brainwashed and there's nothing you can do or say to snap her out of it. Imagine begging her to get help but she's so deep in the addiction that she can't.
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Have you heard of the Hippocratic oath? It is immoral because physical harm is being done on healthy people. Healthy people are being sterilized and having their lives cut dramatically shorter, despite that there is little imperial evidence that any of these measures actually save lives. To me, trans IS the religion. A cult of blood sacrifice. To believe in true science and medicine is to heal patients, not create patients.
As for the patient, I would have done anything to prevent surgeons from disabling him at his own request. At what point can you conclude that therapy doesn’t work? A year? Two? And what methods were used? Mental healing doesn’t have a timeline or a perfect recipe, and to give up on it in favor of the physical mutilation the patient asked for is cruelty. Mutilation is appealing because it is a simple solution to a complicated problem—a lifetime of trauma and confusion.
Harm is not subjective, despite the protestations of those who wish to be harmed.
Do No Harm. It’s as simple as that.
The issue is not with people who believe themselves to be transgender. Who are given the choices that they believe will free them from various constant, chronic miseries.
The issue is that some choices should not exist. This has been demonstrated again and again in our history. Once the decision to lobotomize one’s free-spirited daughter was a sensible and accessible one; once it was sensible to dose a colicky baby with whiskey; once it was common to take heroin for a cough, laudanum for a high-strung temperament, cocaine for depression.
At least two patients not long ago, afflicted only by the mighty conviction they should have been born without a limb, were graciously permitted to have these heathy appendages surgically removed.
And let me remind you that these patients were grateful, and may go to their graves grateful for the disabilities they asked for and received.
Such choices summon an ill-humored genie, grab greedy fingers round the monkey’s paw. Such choices disguise the cost of a reckless wish, often forever to the wisher in their lifetime. Such choices come with a binding understanding on the condition that one be willfully opaque to, a fact which if one were to choose to accept and humble oneself before it, would bring the most awful of consequences.
To admit you were wrong would ruin you.
The people who believe they are transgender have every stake in this fight. If they accept that their choices were wrong, immoral, unjust, psychologically and mentally damaging, at cost of truth, genuity, sense, self, health, and life, their proceeding state would naturally be one of great shame and despair. At the harm they have caused and the lies they have told to themselves and others. Of the crushing farce of their lives, now shortened by unnecessary, gruesome, barbaric surgical and chemical altercations. Of the enormous sum of their own poisonous self-hatred, and the hatred of whatever differences they may possess by the world.
Those who perform these altercations: the genies, the sharp-toothed yellow-nailed monkeys, who offer the choices grandly and gluttonously, sleep well at night with bodies strong enough and hands deft enough to ruin all the bodies they touch. The victims smile, believing themselves saved. The monkeys smile, large sums on paper glowing in their rancid heads. Many of these doctors, surgeons, so-called scientists believe themselves to be doing good in the world (Though some certainly only have a taste for power, money, and mutilation. The do-gooder has a secondhand sour unspoken knowledge, which is that if he is wrong he is a modern Mengele. What else do you call someone who meddles with the bodies of children, with the mentally compromised, with the most utterly desperate, who says goodnight to a whole person and good morning to a mutilated one with a smile? With a smile, with a smile.
Victims are annoying. They are. You don't want to look at them. They are self-involved, destructive, unreasonable as a long-caged animal. They are unnattractively pitiable because they cling to their sickness with the grip of someone hanging off a cliff. They are fickle, flaky, flagrantly inconsiderate of the families, friends and lovers they have alienated with the choices they have made. It is all too tempting to kick such a pathetic creature while it’s down, mocking it shivering in a cage of its own creation.
But their choices should not have existed, their self-imposed cage should never have been imposed concretely by simpering false sympathizers. It is cruel and unproductive to blame a person who has been alienated, marked and mutilated by the esteemed healers of this savage society. A victim, victimized, naturally appears gnarled and unattractive, unpersonable because she has not been treated like a person; the perpetrator, clean-handed, immaculately white-coated, appears godlike. But don’t let that distract you from the true enemy. The enemy is not the choice maker, but the choice giver.
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I wrote this post 3 years ago, so i can’t say I haven’t grown as a writer or a thinker since then. That said, I stand by it.
You keep trying to pin down my experience as an exceptional one, not one illustrating a rule. To quarantine my experience as an anomaly—or the experience of any trans person hurt by the medical/psych system—is a callous attempt at damage control and a supreme gaslight. The amount of notes and messages I have gotten from this post—it is my most popular post of all time, sometimes to my own chagrin—are indicative that I hit on a wider truth. You are a coward for trying to tell me my truth is fiction. Your attempt to wound me is infantile and pathetic. I encourage you to ask yourself why you are truly so bothered by my posts enough that you would dedicate so many precious minutes of your time trying to refute me using not an ounce of fact.
A few days ago, I emailed my former professor about a paper on women’s food practices in the middle ages. At least, that’s what I told him it was about, initially.
But actually, I wanted to discuss heresy. This professor teaches a women’s rights course every year. Every year at the beginning of the class, he calls attention to why he, a man, is talking about women’s rights. He looks us in the eyes and says, no one else is doing it, and I’m sorry it’s me.
This man made us read the SCUM manifesto, Gerda Lerner, Maria Mies. He grazed the subject of the Lesbian Sex Wars, delicately, so gingerly, posing the question: “Can sex work ever be just work?” And my (all woman) classmates, generally mute—in a Women’s Rights class, they all seemed averse to saying the word “woman,” at all. Then one woman raised her hand. and she said, “Sex work is real work.” A statement that, as I hope you know, is a deflection and a discussion killer.
At the time I was non-binary. Hah. I submitted a comic at the end of the year of my final project. My thesis for that project was this: the very language female people have to use for themselves was constructed by the patriarchy. for example, the english word “vagina” comes from the latin word for “sheath”. so the vagina invokes the act of penetration upon its utterance. Whereas the word “penis” has no clear etymological root, implying that it is original while the vagina is constructed for him. Why should I carry the fact that I will always be a tool, the hole, of the human that is man? My solution, at the end of the comic, was to continue using they/them pronouns, to shield myself from the horror of being a wo-man, a s-he—an appendage of Him.
I got a good grade. A stellar report. And it wasn’t a bad comic, for what I knew then. For my condition of blindness and deafness. I made a compelling argument, using sources from class. But oh, how much older I feel now. I’ve always felt old but now I feel almost like I’m dying. Like I don’t have enough time to fix the world before I disappear. And women’s stories never survive. They are not surviving. networks spring up like mycelium and then every century at least they are burned. Witchcraft is in the air shared by women in a room of their own, and witchcraft is doused in gasoline.
I don’t have enough time to explain how the veil lifted for me. Maybe I forget the big moment. the days after were a blur of searching the no-no tags like radical feminist, GNC, gender critical. Amazed at the wealth of journals that these women linked to with real statistics showing that children are being sterilized for no reason. Mostly gay children. like me, a lesbian, who now lives in a house with three “non-binary afabs”. This summer, one of these women, who I have known since freshman year, will start taking testosterone, a procedure I took up for three turbulent months during my freshman year of college. I get to watch her become what I turned away from, knowing the experience fractured my sense of self to a point of terror and estrangement. I get to watch her hide from her problems and cut herself off from womanhood the way I did for 3 years. I am not a woman, so do I not feel Woman’s pain, she is telling me, I told myself, when I was in a dream. She has so many problems, she laughs. But trans is a separate problem that has nothing to do with those other problems. A coincidence.
(For any trans people reading this, you may think: This transtrender fake-trans never-was-trans woman is treating these nonbinary people as if they were dead! as if they weren’t happy people finally living their truth! —well. I put my mom through the process of trying to convince her that I should have always been a man. and I did lose her, for months. For her it was the height of cognitive dissonance that I should want to go on a life-altering hormone to cure my lifelong social awkwardness and self-hatred and self-harm and depression. And I blamed her for not accepting my real self. I was basically made to shun her and my family because of transphobia.. It is disrespectful to anyone’s sanity and integrity for me to perpetuate that cognitive dissonance in this post.)
So I eventually got through to the professor. I knew because of the texts he had us to read for class. He is gay. He has read all the theory, and lives by it. And no (woman) student wants to speak to him. To bring the theory alive. They cannot breathe into it and it sits dead in his mouth.
Maybe it is because he is a man. because the presence of one man in a space of all women immediately sends up alerts. lockdown. Certainly that is the case. Radical Feminists here: I know he’s a man. But I don’t have a woman. And I felt on the strength of the texts he’d given us that he would be my best bet. Maybe somewhere in the corrupted, rotting heart of my college there was a person who knew about thoughtcrimes and was thinking them anyway.
My professor starts with diversion. He starts by talking about my paper. I find it disconcerting that he starts that way. I worry that he won’t want to refer to my email. Where I say: I have woken up from a dream to the apocalypse—Does this man think I’m crazy? Chipper and kind of frantically, he lists off primary sources of medieval nuns and women saints. for my paper. Does this man think I’ve turned into a bigot? Am I confessing lunacy, like a flat-earther?
But I steer the conversation to the meat at his first tentative encouragement. I tell him something like: “children, mostly gay children, a whole generation of gay children, are being sterilized. Porn is a symptom of late-stage capitalism—men’s ownership of women’s bodies. trans is an extension of this. I was part of this. I was in a cult.” I was shaking a bit. I don’t think I’d uttered those words out loud. They sound crazy. Some of the things I said did sound far-fetched. disorganized, remote. But I prayed that my professor would believe some of it, any of it.
What I will say is that he believes me. Thank fuck, right?
He tells me something along the lines of this, vocalizing my fears:
that all of academia is being scrubbed of anything that doesn’t support Trans.
And it is trans-identified female students and women who are reporting him to Title IX, who spend all their time in his classes fuming at the lack of validation for trans women in the history of women. My sisters, footsoldiers for the cause. What cruel irony. This man is holding onto this class by his fingernails, speaking through his teeth, hoping any of the twenty young adult women staring blankly or angrily at him will hear him and listen.
Looking back, the professor’s responses to my emails are vague, completely refusing to acknowledge a point of view other than “WOW. I look forward to discussing this.” I think he thinks he could be blackmailed. Anything he says on gmail dot com can and would be used against him. It’s like, really, really, really that bad.
No ideology should involve a cultural cleaning of women’s history feat. witch hunts.
I will end here with an excerpt from my first email to this professor:
I’m sure you know what a total bummer it is to realize this.
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If the user had never had the surgery she would never have been exposed to a bacterial infection and the parasite would not have been as life threatening. If the user has left her healthy body alone she would not have been exposed to medical negligence. As for the so called satisfaction rate—what would you do if you had gone through such irrevocable trauma?? Admit defeat? No. Such an admission would be psychologically devastating.
I am not “demonizing trans bodies”, you absolute muppet. I am making a case that cosmetic, irreversible surgeries with complications well over 50% should never be performed. As I have told users in the comments, your apathy for your own people when you dismiss such cases as anomalies shows your disregard for human life. It shows you have not lived long or well enough to appreciate the gift that good health is.
a story of one fake penis, 39 surgeries and counting.
This story I found through this post. don't click it unless you want to see frankendick. Frankly, the phalloplasty looks okay (only compared to most I've seen and I've seen too many. too... too many doing this work) besides the enormous scars and color mismatch. It's a low bar. But I was interested to see the user's progression.
That post, of surgery results the user admits took three years to achieve (""), is from two years ago. According to the user's more recent post history, it's been downhill from there.
11 months ago, the user's erectile implant began pushing through the skin, requiring surgery. Three months later, after the revision, the complication repeated. In this post from r/Everythingphallo 4 months ago, called "Is there anyone here who has had a phalloplasty reconstruction?"— the user states:
Initially, everything was perfect – it looked aesthetically pleasing, had great functionality, and the sensation was at 100%. However, over the past 3 years, I have had 15-20 surgeries due to complications and issues. The appearance is now completely deteriorated, and my functionality is greatly limited. The scars are contracting more and more, causing a loss of 4 cm in length, which wouldn't be so bad if it still looked good and functioned properly.
in the comments, the user clarifies a major reason for the many revision surgeries was problems with the constructed urethra. Multiple surgical revisions to the urethra caused stiffening, hardening, constricting scar tissue. A bacterial infection was additionally overlooked for "several years" which worsened the damage, and no doubt put the user at severe risk of bladder and kidney infection.
As indicated by the post's title, the user does not want to stop surgery, but instead wants to entirely reconstruct the phallus using the same technique, radial free flap phalloplasty, as performed the first time. This would mean she would have massive scars and limited mobility/strength in both of her arms and hands.
In this post from two months ago, things are somehow worse. (How..?!!)
user states:
Recently, I lost all sensation (previously 100%), can no longer experience orgasms, and suffered a 50% reduction in length due to a parasite that damaged the tissue. Furthermore, I am scheduled for an emergency surgery because my ED has once again resulted in the skin breaking, marking the 5th or 6th time in a year. In general this is my 39 surgery and I’m so tired.
Parasite?!? Which apparently doctors missed for OVER TWO YEARS?? Jesus Christ, if she was playing medical bingo she'd have won years ago. But of course, she's lost everything.
All that the first phalloplasty got her was 39 surgeries, urethral strictures, loss of all sexual sensation, bacterial infections, parasites, she still wants another one.
Don't you dare say this is life-saving surgery in any capacity. It is life-ending, mentally, physically, figuratively, literally.
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You're not still in pain right? Are you still suffering from HRT effects?
I have minor permanent effects, but nothing medically significant.
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an excerpt | read the full thread by eliza mondegreen
Phobia indoctrination instills irrational fears in members of a high-control group and uses those fears to manipulate members so they won't question the group's beliefs or try to leave. Here's what phobia indoctrination looks like in the trans community:
Telling community members that anyone who questions gender identity or transition (even if from a place of genuine care and concern) hates them, 'denies their existence,' or even wants them dead.
Pushing community members, especially naive children/young people, to cut themselves off from friends & loved ones who may question or contradict the trans community, or may simply fail to follow elaborate and bizarre protocols trans communities lead young members to expect.
Creating the false impression of a trans murder epidemic, which binds members to the trans community & increases their fear of the outside world out of all proportion to actual risk.
Inflating suicide risk & presenting transition as the only alternative to suicide when it comes to dealing with gender dysphoria. This increases desperation to transition, suppresses questions or doubts a person may have, & pushes patients to conceal other issues from doctors.
Vilifying and attacking detransitioners as traitors and existential threats to the community, thus demonstrating to current members of the trans community *exactly what will happen to them* if they step out of line or—god forbid—leave.
Teaching community members to bury their own questions and doubts by labeling any uncertainty about gender identity, transition, or community dynamics as manifestations of "internalized transphobia" that cause harm not just to the individual but to ALL TRANS PEOPLE.
thinking about detransition? you are not alone
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thank you so much for sharing, you're a really brave woman.
when I transitioned(and I transitioned for far less time than you did), I must have also thought that the (incomplete) list of "side" effects on Planned Parenthood's informed consent sheet would only match the severity and timeline of real males. "men also have higher blood pressure/cholesterol." etc. Only recently have I discovered the degree to which this is a dangerous misconception. The issues listed are drastically more severe than the wording would have you believe. Most are not even side effects, they're dependable effects that necessarily happen along with the so-called positive effects like hair growth and lowered voice. vaginal atrophy was described only as "vaginal dryness"——no mention of pain after orgasm, the risk of frequent UTIs due to damaged micrbiome/tissue thinning, and the need to have a hysterectomy, ie become a medical patient for life, in order to curb the risk of unimaginable pain, cancer, infection, and prolapse. it infuriates me how we're being lied to, how many of us were so hurt like you were, and how retributions are not coming, or if they are they are too late.
I started on T at 16 years old and was given a basic overview of the effects: body fat redistribution, voice changes, hair growth, increased cholesterol/cardiac issues, and other health problems that affected men. The impression I got was that these problems would crop up during middle age, as they typically do for men.
I wasn’t told, or my clinician was unaware, of some of the other effects that were specific problems for bio women taking cross sex hormones, and that they would start in my 20s.
Over the 10+ years I injected testosterone, I developed liver dysfunction, sleep apnea from the growth of my neck and larynx blocking my airways, abnormally high blood pressure, vaginal atrophy, frequent UTIs due to the hormones changing the microbiome of my urinary tract. These are not problems that cis men face.
I’m not anti trans, and I still consider myself transgender (perhaps “person of trans experience” would be a better way to phrase it). Wanting to get this information out isn’t my attempt at gatekeeping people who want to start HRT. I know I ultimately cannot convince someone who cannot be swayed by the reality of a stranger on the internet.
I just don’t want anyone else to go through what I’ve gone through.
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@baberaham-linkedln
It sounds like you are ignorant to the sanctity of human life, and the blessing of good health that doctors choose to ruin for hundreds of thousands of dollars. Maybe you are very young and don't understand the extent of the crimes committed in this case and thousands of others. Maybe you take your health for granted, or are suicidal enough that you don't understand that health is a gift that must be protected. Can you deny that good mental health is at least partially predicated on good physical health?
It also sounds like you don't understand the extent of the complications experienced in the grand majority of phalloplasties. If it isn't urethral strictures, infection or necrosis, it's incontinence or erectile device failure. the user here experienced all of these, over time, years after her surgery had been completed. a person who has "success" with their surgery is not home free. the rest of their life is spent dealing with complication after complication. No doubt the complication rate of phalloplasty, admittedly over 50 percent at the initial surgery, is inflated when taking into account complications over a lifetime. There are so many failure points in this surgery that it is impossible to avoid all of them, sooner or later.
as for the pronouns issue—as a radical feminist I believe in using sex-based pronouns to illustrate reality. Kindness is secondary to truth—or rather, truth is a kindness. To be kind is not to be nice or placating, not merely designed to soothe, but to be truthful as well as empathetic. My use of the she pronoun is not an attack but a reinforcement of the truth. The use of the he pronoun in this case would falsely indicate that a damaged male requires a penis, and all complications, near-death experiences, despairs, losses of hope are worth this man becoming whole. The use of the male pronoun is not promoting empathy, but enforcing apathy to this person's needless suffering.
a story of one fake penis, 39 surgeries and counting.
This story I found through this post. don't click it unless you want to see frankendick. Frankly, the phalloplasty looks okay (only compared to most I've seen and I've seen too many. too... too many doing this work) besides the enormous scars and color mismatch. It's a low bar. But I was interested to see the user's progression.
That post, of surgery results the user admits took three years to achieve (""), is from two years ago. According to the user's more recent post history, it's been downhill from there.
11 months ago, the user's erectile implant began pushing through the skin, requiring surgery. Three months later, after the revision, the complication repeated. In this post from r/Everythingphallo 4 months ago, called "Is there anyone here who has had a phalloplasty reconstruction?"— the user states:
Initially, everything was perfect – it looked aesthetically pleasing, had great functionality, and the sensation was at 100%. However, over the past 3 years, I have had 15-20 surgeries due to complications and issues. The appearance is now completely deteriorated, and my functionality is greatly limited. The scars are contracting more and more, causing a loss of 4 cm in length, which wouldn't be so bad if it still looked good and functioned properly.
in the comments, the user clarifies a major reason for the many revision surgeries was problems with the constructed urethra. Multiple surgical revisions to the urethra caused stiffening, hardening, constricting scar tissue. A bacterial infection was additionally overlooked for "several years" which worsened the damage, and no doubt put the user at severe risk of bladder and kidney infection.
As indicated by the post's title, the user does not want to stop surgery, but instead wants to entirely reconstruct the phallus using the same technique, radial free flap phalloplasty, as performed the first time. This would mean she would have massive scars and limited mobility/strength in both of her arms and hands.
In this post from two months ago, things are somehow worse. (How..?!!)
user states:
Recently, I lost all sensation (previously 100%), can no longer experience orgasms, and suffered a 50% reduction in length due to a parasite that damaged the tissue. Furthermore, I am scheduled for an emergency surgery because my ED has once again resulted in the skin breaking, marking the 5th or 6th time in a year. In general this is my 39 surgery and I’m so tired.
Parasite?!? Which apparently doctors missed for OVER TWO YEARS?? Jesus Christ, if she was playing medical bingo she'd have won years ago. But of course, she's lost everything.
All that the first phalloplasty got her was 39 surgeries, urethral strictures, loss of all sexual sensation, bacterial infections, parasites, she still wants another one.
Don't you dare say this is life-saving surgery in any capacity. It is life-ending, mentally, physically, figuratively, literally.
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The issue is not with people who believe themselves to be transgender. Who are given the choices that they believe will free them from various constant, chronic miseries.
The issue is that some choices should not exist. This has been demonstrated again and again in our history. Once the decision to lobotomize one’s free-spirited daughter was a sensible and accessible one; once it was sensible to dose a colicky baby with whiskey; once it was common to take heroin for a cough, laudanum for a high-strung temperament, cocaine for depression.
At least two patients not long ago, afflicted only by the mighty conviction they should have been born without a limb, were graciously permitted to have these heathy appendages surgically removed.
And let me remind you that these patients were grateful, and may go to their graves grateful for the disabilities they asked for and received.
Such choices summon an ill-humored genie, grab greedy fingers round the monkey’s paw. Such choices disguise the cost of a reckless wish, often forever to the wisher in their lifetime. Such choices come with a binding understanding on the condition that one be willfully opaque to, a fact which if one were to choose to accept and humble oneself before it, would bring the most awful of consequences.
To admit you were wrong would ruin you.
The people who believe they are transgender have every stake in this fight. If they accept that their choices were wrong, immoral, unjust, psychologically and mentally damaging, at cost of truth, genuity, sense, self, health, and life, their proceeding state would naturally be one of great shame and despair. At the harm they have caused and the lies they have told to themselves and others. Of the crushing farce of their lives, now shortened by unnecessary, gruesome, barbaric surgical and chemical altercations. Of the enormous sum of their own poisonous self-hatred, and the hatred of whatever differences they may possess by the world.
Those who perform these altercations: the genies, the sharp-toothed yellow-nailed monkeys, who offer the choices grandly and gluttonously, sleep well at night with bodies strong enough and hands deft enough to ruin all the bodies they touch. The victims smile, believing themselves saved. The monkeys smile, large sums on paper glowing in their rancid heads. Many of these doctors, surgeons, so-called scientists believe themselves to be doing good in the world (Though some certainly only have a taste for power, money, and mutilation. The do-gooder has a secondhand sour unspoken knowledge, which is that if he is wrong he is a modern Mengele. What else do you call someone who meddles with the bodies of children, with the mentally compromised, with the most utterly desperate, who says goodnight to a whole person and good morning to a mutilated one with a smile? With a smile, with a smile.
Victims are annoying. They are. You don't want to look at them. They are self-involved, destructive, unreasonable as a long-caged animal. They are unnattractively pitiable because they cling to their sickness with the grip of someone hanging off a cliff. They are fickle, flaky, flagrantly inconsiderate of the families, friends and lovers they have alienated with the choices they have made. It is all too tempting to kick such a pathetic creature while it’s down, mocking it shivering in a cage of its own creation.
But their choices should not have existed, their self-imposed cage should never have been imposed concretely by simpering false sympathizers. It is cruel and unproductive to blame a person who has been alienated, marked and mutilated by the esteemed healers of this savage society. A victim, victimized, naturally appears gnarled and unattractive, unpersonable because she has not been treated like a person; the perpetrator, clean-handed, immaculately white-coated, appears godlike. But don’t let that distract you from the true enemy. The enemy is not the choice maker, but the choice giver.
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a story of one fake penis, 39 surgeries and counting.
This story I found through this post. don't click it unless you want to see frankendick. Frankly, the phalloplasty looks okay (only compared to most I've seen and I've seen too many. too... too many doing this work) besides the enormous scars and color mismatch. It's a low bar. But I was interested to see the user's progression.
That post, of surgery results the user admits took three years to achieve (""), is from two years ago. According to the user's more recent post history, it's been downhill from there.
11 months ago, the user's erectile implant began pushing through the skin, requiring surgery. Three months later, after the revision, the complication repeated. In this post from r/Everythingphallo 4 months ago, called "Is there anyone here who has had a phalloplasty reconstruction?"— the user states:
Initially, everything was perfect – it looked aesthetically pleasing, had great functionality, and the sensation was at 100%. However, over the past 3 years, I have had 15-20 surgeries due to complications and issues. The appearance is now completely deteriorated, and my functionality is greatly limited. The scars are contracting more and more, causing a loss of 4 cm in length, which wouldn't be so bad if it still looked good and functioned properly.
in the comments, the user clarifies a major reason for the many revision surgeries was problems with the constructed urethra. Multiple surgical revisions to the urethra caused stiffening, hardening, constricting scar tissue. A bacterial infection was additionally overlooked for "several years" which worsened the damage, and no doubt put the user at severe risk of bladder and kidney infection.
As indicated by the post's title, the user does not want to stop surgery, but instead wants to entirely reconstruct the phallus using the same technique, radial free flap phalloplasty, as performed the first time. This would mean she would have massive scars and limited mobility/strength in both of her arms and hands.
In this post from two months ago, things are somehow worse. (How..?!!)
user states:
Recently, I lost all sensation (previously 100%), can no longer experience orgasms, and suffered a 50% reduction in length due to a parasite that damaged the tissue. Furthermore, I am scheduled for an emergency surgery because my ED has once again resulted in the skin breaking, marking the 5th or 6th time in a year. In general this is my 39 surgery and I’m so tired.
Parasite?!? Which apparently doctors missed for OVER TWO YEARS?? Jesus Christ, if she was playing medical bingo she'd have won years ago. But of course, she's lost everything.
All that the first phalloplasty got her was 39 surgeries, urethral strictures, loss of all sexual sensation, bacterial infections, parasites, she still wants another one.
Don't you dare say this is life-saving surgery in any capacity. It is life-ending, mentally, physically, figuratively, literally.
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Anyone should be able to get bottom surgery for any reason, and it should be free.
Cis guy wants a vaginoplasty but nothing else, and still identifies as a cis guy? ABSOLUTELY.
Cis girl wants phalloplasty? WITHOUT QUESTION.
People should be allowed to have whatever relationship with their bodies and identities makes sense for them.
(this post MUST be reblogged by EVERYONE)
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hello from Outland! A women's land in New Mexico. it's home to Maize Magazine and probably the country's largest feminist library. there are duplicates of many of the books that visitors are encouraged to take home. i'm staying in a small adobe cottage while helping out the founder of Outland, Jae Haggard, who is very intelligent and warm. about 30 young women have come here this year, but I'm the only one this month. if you're in the southwest, please do consider visiting.
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