the real interest of the myths is that they lead us back to a time when the world was young and people had a connection with the earth, with trees and seas and flowers and hills, unlike anything we ourselves can feel

Foreword to Mythology by Edith Hamilton

“You can’t leave yet. I’m not finished falling in love with you.”

— Colleen Hoover, Slammed

I'm tired of being the bad influence, somebody be the bad influence on me

benoit blanc had the right idea with his version of swearing. the comedic genius of saying things like ‘fiddlesticks’ and ‘lord help us’ is enough in itself, but paired with the occasional ‘MOTHERFUCKING SHITBALLS’ at the exact right moment, i am truly enraptured. i will begin using this method immediately

If I had a nickel for everytime i winded up loving a ship in which a drug dealer with a heart of gold falls for a good girl after seeing her perform at a childhood talent show and he keeps that moment in his memory years after, then I would have two shiny nickels.

It's not much but it's weird that it happened twice.

NATE MACAULEY + “FUCKING ROJAS”

1x07 // 1x08 // 2x04 // 2x05

"Un-uhlaive? UN-UHLAIVE? Ma'am, that man has been killed. He has been MUHDUHED. To DEATH."

I need to wake up in 2.5 hours to go to the airport but this post is more important than sleep: there is only one time I think Glass Onion should have crossed over with Knives Out and that’s a scene right after Helen agrees to impersonate Andy whereupon Blanc pulls up to Marta’s mansion, explains the situation, and politely asks her if, having dealt with the Thrombeys, she has any advice to help Helen be a “rich bitch”? One montage, a haircut, and a suitcase of dresses from one of the Thrombeys’ old wardrobes later, Marta happily sips her coffee and waves from the balcony as Blanc and Helen drive off to go to dinner and discuss their mission.

via

we dont know anything about Benoit Blanc's husband except that hes called Philip but i want him to be a retired jewel thief who Benoit met during a case after he was hired to locate some stolen diamonds and Philip was posing as a gardener and Benoit kept asking him increasingly complicated questions about gardening so Philip thought he was onto him but really Benoit just thought he was hot and asked Philip out but the entire time Philip was like this is some kind of gambit so kept getting weirder and weirder until Benoit was like what is up with you so Philip confessed the whole thing and Benoit was like oh shit. but the guy he robbed was a total asshole so Benoit was like whatever it's fine so they started dating and the diamonds ended up paying for their apartment

there is something so darkly comical about tumblr potentially outliving twitter

tumblr, which is held together with duct tape and madness, run by three raccoons in blood stained Yahoo! hats and a handful of crabs, its only discernible source of income the sale of shoelaces from an inside joke so inside no one knows the original source anymore and fake blue checkmarks... that website still lives on

truly the cockroach of social media and I love it for that

Jingle All The Way (1996) dir. Brian Levant