Beauty is rarely soft and consolatory. Quite the contrary.
Genuine beauty is always quite alarming.
—Donna Tart, The Secret History
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“What if I slept a little more and forgot about all this nonsense.”
— Franz Kafka
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We live in an infinity cycle of fear and self doubt
We decide ourselves that we don’t deserve the opportunities in front of us.
We sabotage our own future with unkind words in the mirror, leaving our minds open for
The imposter that overshadows that spark within us.
We are creators of the negative universe that gravitates around us.
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“El escultor ciego” (1632) painted by Jusepe de Ribera (1591-1652)
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“Experience is merely the name men gave to their mistakes.”
—Oscar Wild, The Picture of Dorian Grey
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I am an entity mimicking the living
Existing in autopilot
Almost performing to perfection
Nobody has noticed yet
That’s how good of an actress I am
The daily ritual that meant something once
Now have become a monotonous chore
Nothing brings joy to my heart
I am just an empty shell
That moves along with the current of the world
I have no free will
I either get pulled down or drown
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The world is full of poets.
But she;
But she herself is poetry.
—Archana Bhandari
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Indeed , I am a dark thing, a dark body, a haunting echo, a beautiful cry.
—s.anja
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“ I exist. In thousand of agonies— I exist.”
—Fyodor Dostoyevsky
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“I like people too much or not at all”
—Sylvia Plath
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You are so brave and quiet I forget you are suffering.
—Ernest Hemingway
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Madness strikes again tonight
I can feel it growing
Consuming me from the inside
I take a breath, and another
Making sure I’m still alive
I can feel myself losing control of my body
There is no where to escape
My chest growing tighter with every breath I take
Losing my voice and slowly my will
I fear I won’t come back from this
You hold my hand to keep me grounded
Keeping me safe from myself
I don’t want to disappear
I can hear my heart beat as loud as thunder
But I still feel you
Keeping me from floating away
I focus on your touch
Leading me back to myself
I close my eyes and breath again
safely returning to your side
Once more keeping the monster locked inside
Until next time . . .
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The earth will shatter under our feet
Swallowing up our pain
Leaving only darkness
No more sadness, no more anger, no more fear
Destruction will be all we know
Making this our eternal existence
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I want to live in a castle far away from people.
Wander dark, candle lit, stone walls at midnight.
Spend my days in a beautiful garden decorated with white peonies, hidden from the world by large bushes and ivy covered trees.
Immerse myself in a grand library, full of time collected books, daydreaming while listening to smooth and mellow classical music.
Dress in black, flowing gowns that wave in the wind as I run down spiral stairs leading to dark rooms in the search of my next ghost story.
Is that too much to ask for?
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my insanity lies bare
these walls which once contained it
show signs of weakness and deterioration.
The empty halls echo the cries of my aging
my secrets are hidden between stone walls
the curse of my memories wander at midnight
I can hear a mellow and silky cello
accompanied by a sweet and dark piano
As dance my very last dance alone
I feel the slow footsteps of death come closer
its cloak dragging behind with a somber sash
holding the candle of my life in its cold hands
its puckered lips awaiting my last b
it joins me in center stage
griping my hands like deadly vine
my time is running out
but all i want to do is dance
Agony never makes its final appearance
Relief takes its place
My final moments crowned by the most blissful symphony
A tribute to my evanescence life
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