see how inappropriate they are?

i have seen the inappropriate plants.

i have seen the inappropriate plants.

um...

👀 + Fav animal?

salamanders! have you seen them? they're so cute!!!

👀 do you think you'll make a good ruler?

i worry about that every day. what if i'm not? what if i fuck things up? it's scary, to be honest.

Send my muse “👀 + a question” and they’ll have to answer with 100% honesty.

No deleting questions, either!

ask-discworld-death:

WELL, I MOSTLY DEAL WITH THE SOULS. I HAVE A ROOM FILLED WITH LIFETIMERS, WHICH LOOK LIKE THE AVERAGE HOURGLASS ONLY A BIT LARGER. WHEN THE SAND IS LOW, I FIND THE MORTAL, AND ONCE THEY HAVE DIED I FREE THEIR SOUL FROM THEIR BODY.

ALSO, THOUGH, THERE’S A GOOD BIT OF DELEGATION. THE ONLY ONES I NEED TO BE THERE FOR ARE WIZARDS, ROYALTY, AND IMPORTANT DEATHS - THE LATTER MOSTLY BEING UP TO MY JUDGEMENT - TO MAKE SURE THINGS WORKS. WELL. AND THE WIZARDS EXPECT THAT, SEE IT AS AN HONOUR? REGARDLESS, IF I CAN’T KEEP UP WITH THE REST, A MINOR DEATH SPIRIT TAKES CARE OF IT.

THEN WE SEND THE SOULS TO THE APPROPRIATE POST-DEATH DESTINATION. WE AREN’T EXACTLY ALLOWED TO ENTER, THOUGH, SO I KNOW RELATIVELY LITTLE ABOUT THEM.

OH! AND THERE ARE BOOKS THAT FILL WITH THE LIFE DETAILS OF EVERYONE ALIVE ON THE DISC. I KEEP THOSE SAFE, THOUGH IT DOESN’T TAKE MUCH.

holy shit. no seriously, holy shit.

i don’t even know what i’m supposed to do with all of that. you’re not, like, my death, are you? i’ve never heard of you before is the thing.

ladyofnull:

good :) five mns and im there

so soon! you’re the best, you know that?

ladyofnull:

awww hon. im already up and on my way, s that ok?

that’s so much more than ok, i promise!

ask-discworld-death:

…ER. YES? I AM THE SPECTRE OF DEATH OM THE DISC. I DELEGATE SOMETIMES, THOUGH. ONLY NEED TO KEEP MOMENTUM GOING, REALLY, FOR THE MOST PART.

A PLEASURE TO MAKE YOUR ACQUAINTANCE.

how even does that work? like, what even do you do?

i was having a good day, and then it felt like the bottom fell out of everything. i kind of don't want to be alone tonight.

@ladyofnull what kind of noise was that supposed to be?

wait, are you like actually some kind of death thing?

is anyone on?

@ladyofnull what kind of noise was that supposed to be?

is anyone on?

arcaneplegian:

… Rose sits on the bed and stretches out, pulling the Viceroy from his spot in her bag and letting him coil on her lap, the Cobra glaring at the man across the room, before laying down. “You pass. I grant you my blessing. Now come over here so we can talk with Roxy and Viceroy Bubbles may grow accustomed to your scent.”

Wait, what? Pass? Blessing? What was going on? Why did this woman change her entire attitude? And why did she have a snake? “Um, what’s going on? Is that snake seriously called Viceroy Bubbles? And who said anything about Roxy?” Something was horribly off, and he didn’t know what it was. What was he still missing? 

arcaneplegian:

And now she was grinding on him, very lightly, breath hot against his chin. “Oh please sire, it’d be an honor~ Maybe we could-” Her hands trail down his arms, grasping around the wrist and forcing him to rest his hands on her ass. “Try something special? I’ve never had a human.”

His hands were on her ass, and she was definitely grinding against him, and that lasted all of two seconds before he was about two feet away from her breathing heavily. Where even had that come from? Was that something she wanted? Was that the whole point? Had she always wanted it?

“Dude, I’m not into vore!” Ok, that was probably not a good start. “Or really casual sex with strangers. Like I’m sure you’re very nice, but I would want to get to know you first, and also talk about this with my girlfriend, because even though she has other partners, we never actually talked specifically about me having more, and I want to respect her boundaries, even if I’m fairly sure she’d be ok with it. But that doesn’t change the fact that I’d have to get to know you way better than I do now, because, well, I’m not all that into sex at all really? It’s just not something I want all that much, and she respects that and it’s amazing, and how could I not respect her boundaries since she respects mine?” Oh, that was way more than he’d meant to say, but at least he didn’t name drop her. “I mean, I think she counts as a girlfriend. Like, we are dating. We are definitely dating...”

arcaneplegian:

“Well, if you could maybe, let me stay here for a while? I can pay you back!!! Not really with currency but, well.” She gives a rather convincing nervous laugh as she gestures down to herself. “I was going to go down to dance at a club but, well, the thugs heh. I could dance for you!!” And now, to touch up on him. She leaned on him, bust pressed against his front and arms swung around his neck. “I’d be honored to dance for such handsome royalty~”

John sputtered and coughed. She wanted to dance for him? As, like, reward? Well, he’d always heard about rewards for heroes, but that seemed an awful lot for just being allowed to stay in a room. “I mean I guess you can if you want? I was really not asking for any kind of reward or anything, I mean you’re just staying with me, that’s not actually a big deal.” Oh, but he sure was blushing though.