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billyrussohaven · 1 year

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Such a Softer Sin (Part 9)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: I’ve really been enjoying all of your comments and it's been fun seeing all of the theories people have been coming up with looool

Thank you all for your super kind words about this story so far! I really appreciate the support.

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You couldn’t tear your eyes away from the moon as you all waited for Billy to speak to the Goddess. You’d never seen anything like it, the moon wasn't supposed to wane before it even got full and the implications scared the crap out of you. You were gnawing your lower lip raw as you stared at it, Kos and Frank quietly talking among themselves. You heard the sound of the castle gates opening and your head whipped over. When they opened, you were surprised to see Atticus strolling inside the grounds. Alone. You felt a conflicting mix of relief, happiness and anger and you started storming right over.

“Well look who decided to grace us with his presence. Your mate not with you?” you asked snidely as you got close enough. He blinked at you for a moment, a little frown etching his brows and he seemed to tense up as he shook his head.

“She’s stayed behind for now, she’s dealing with some things,” he said simply.

“Like what?” you asked, raising a brow and he shifted on his feet, unable to look at you.

“It’s personal, it’s not my place to say,” he frowned and you scoffed a mirthless laugh.

“Right, of course not,” you muttered and his frown deepened.

“You know all about trauma, Y/N. You know what that shit’s like,” he murmured and the look on his face made your mouth clamp shut. You felt a little bad then. You didn’t know this girl at all, no idea what the hell she'd been through. Maybe she’d been through similar horrors to you and Atti, maybe that’s why she behaved the way she did. You felt a little bad at how you’d been behaving. Maybe if you had the chance to bond with her, this wouldn't happen. You hoped to be able to connect with her at some point to suss her out, to really get to know her.

“I’ll be going back in a few days, I don’t really want to be away from her,” he said quietly, a sheepish look on his face. Your jaw ticked as you looked away at the news but you bit back your snarky response.

“I know I’ve been absent and I’m sorry. I want to divide my time between you all equally, it's just hard. Having a mate… it's more overwhelming than I thought it would be. I didn’t expect to feel like this. The love, it’s just… it's so much. A love that would make you do anything. It’s… It’s intense and I don’t know how to deal with it. I’m struggling,” he admitted a slightly panicked edge to his voice that had guilt ramming right through you like a sword. He looked completely and utterly lost and you suddenly found yourself feeling like the worst friend in the world for only thinking about yourself here.

“It’s okay, Atti. I won’t pretend to know what it’s like, but I can imagine it’s a lot to deal with. And I haven't exactly been the most understanding friend. I’ve just been scared to lose you,” you confessed and he reached out, taking your hand and the gesture was so comforting that it made your chest feel like it imploded.

“You won’t lose me, I promise. I’m just trying to adjust,” he murmured and you nodded. You were just glad to finally see him, to finally talk to him and clear the air between you.

“Have you noticed anything?” you asked with a wry smile tugging at your lips and he looked at you confused.

“No, what”? He asked warily. You gestured with your hand to the moon and he looked up, blinking at it as a perplexed look washed all over him.

“Is it… is it smaller?” he asked slowly before he looked back to you.

“Seems like it. The King's just trying to contact the Goddess Selene to figure out what’s going on,” you shrugged and the pair of you shared a worried glance before you started making your way back over to Kos and Frank. Kos greeted Atti a lot more amicably than you had done and your eyes kept darting up to the moon as you wondered what Billy might find out. You looked over at Frank and he frowned, a look on his face that once again let you know he was being mindlinked.

“The King wants us in the meeting room,” he muttered, looking at the three of you before he turned and made his way up the steps. You all followed him and up to the meeting room just as Karen, Micro and Curtis were arriving too. You walked inside the room and Billy was at the head of the table pacing and it made a knot form in your stomach. He looked worried and that made you worried. You moved to sit down between Kos and Atti, the others taking the other side of the table, all of you looking to the King for answers.

“I can’t reach my mother,” he bit out worriedly and a deafening silence overtook the room.

“That’s… that’s never happened before, somethin’ ain’t right,” he added, his frantic and wide eyes flitting to you then to Frank as he shook his head. The news was even more worrisome and made you think something incredibly nefarious was going on, not just the moon being funky.

“Could the vampires be behind this? I mean, if the moon never gets full then the wolves can’t turn. It would weaken us over time,” you frowned with dread. Not being able to shift for an extended period of time was dangerous and in some cases, even deadly if it went on long enough.

“I agree with Y/N. This has the undead freak’s stink all over it and if they’re tryin’ to weaken us, then they’re already plannin’ somethin’,” Frank muttered tensely, his cagey eyes boring into Billy who wiped a hand over his face with a nod.

“But how could the vampires mess with the moon like that?” Micro asked in confusion.

“Is it possible they have witches on their side?” you asked as your eyes cut to Karen across from you. Her eyes widened for a moment before a deep frown creased her brows.

“I mean… Some witches would definitely have the power to pull something like this off, but the witches have no loyalty to the vampires and they respect the laws of nature. They’d never do something like this willingly,” she shook her head.

“What about unwillingly?” Frank asked as he gave his mate a pointed look. “They could have taken some against their will and be forcin’ ‘em to do magic,” he added gravely and Karen’s face paled, fear shining behind her eyes.

“I need to go and speak to some of my girls, see if we can figure out if this is magic related or not,” she stood up and rushed out the room and Frank watched her forlornly at how upset she seemed.

“Frank, I need you and Curt to get the guards ready, some warriors too. I want ‘em stationed outside around the castle and at the outposts. Micro, you need to contact all the local pack leaders, take some warriors to each pack to keep ‘em safe and tell them what’s goin’ on,” Billy started firmly and the three men nodded before leaving to complete their tasks.

“Kosmos, I need you and Atticus to take point with some of my men outside the castle. I know you guys can handle it, we’ll be doin’ it in shifts,” he ordered.

“Of course, Your Majesty,” Kos nodded as he and Atti both stood. Atti shot you a look before they left you were left sitting there alone. If you were honest, you felt a little put out that you hadn’t been given a job to do. You were more than capable of handling it and you didn't understand why you weren’t with Kos or Atti. The idea of him thinking you weren’t up to task prickled at you.

“Can I do anything?” you asked, trying to keep the edge from your voice as you watched him run a hand through his hair and mess it up. He glanced at you before his eyes quickly looked away, rolling his shoulder as he nodded.

“I need you for somethin’ important, actually. Come on,” he muttered. He looked like a tightly wound coil and you got up as you followed him out of the room. You had no idea what this supposed important job was but you were just happy to be helping in some way.

He led you down the main stairs and through a door just near them. You’d never been in here before and you were surprised to find more stairs going down. Even more surprised that instead of some kind of basement, you were walking into what looked to be some kind of temple. Wall to ceiling was made of the brightest white marble you’d ever seen with a large white marble altar in the middle. There were two huge gold wolf statues against either side of the back wall with a gold statue of the Goddess herself taking center of them. You were in awe as your eyes soaked it all in, it was breathtaking. He gave you little time to really bask in the place before he was talking to you.

“I need to visit my mother… I’ve never done it before, there’s a ritual to do it and I couldn't… but I need to try now. I don’t even know if it’ll work, but I gotta try,” he frowned and you hated how lost he looked.

“Okay… Why do you need me for the ritual?” you asked curiously.

“I just trust you, okay? This is… it’s urgent, there’s a lot on the line here. We just need to get there and find out what’s goin’ on,” he muttered and you nodded, not wanting to upset him further. Then his words hit you.

“Wait… we? As in we both are going to see her?” you asked in surprise and he nodded jerkily. You could see he was still tense, his body was almost rigid and you decided not to push your luck here. You were surprised you would be going there, getting to see the Goddess yourself like that. You weren’t sure if it was breaking some kind of rules but Billy was asking you to do it, so you hoped it would be okay. You still weren’t sure why it had to be you. While you were touched that he’d trust you with something of this magnitude, you didn’t know why he’d picked you out of everyone. But you told yourself that his men were busy with their other tasks so you were the only one he trusted left without a job. You knew what was at stake here. Not only was the moon being weird but he couldn't contact the Goddess. Nothing good was happening and it needed to be fixed as soon as possible. If that meant you helping him with whatever this ritual was then you’d do it.

“Okay, I’ll do it,” you said with a smile, trying to ease this awful tenseness he had going on. He smiled at you, looking somewhat relieved but it didn't seem to help too much as he frowned once more. He looked at you for a long moment, his dark eyes shining with something you really couldn't decipher.

“Just remember, this is a ritual, alright?” he said slowly, raising both his brows at you. It confused you as you blinked at him but you nodded, wondering what the hell it would entail. After one more look at you, he grabbed his dagger that was strapped on his belt and you were sure he probably carried it around with him everywhere.

He stepped a little closer to you, taking a shaky breath and all you could do was wait for what was about to happen. You could only hope the ritual wouldn't be him sacrificing you. He took one of your hands in his and you were surprised to find it trembling in your own as he lifted it up a little. You winced as he sliced the blade across it and he shot you an apologetic look as the blood started to pool in the cut. He let go but you kept it there so you didn’t drip your blood all over his pristine floor as he did the same to his own hand. His eyes shot to your face then, almost sheepishly before he took your bloodied hand in his own, mixing the blood together. But then he pulled you closer to him by your hand and you bumped into his chest a little.

“Ritual, remember,” he whispered and you wondered how bad it had to be for him to keep reminding you. But you nodded and then he was capturing your lips with his own. You were startled, flashes of the other kiss bursting behind your eyes and you felt yourself tense. But you remembered what he’d said, that this was a ritual and you forced yourself to relax. His hand still clutched your own tightly as you kissed him back and while this wasn’t what you thought would happen, you knew kissing him wasn't the worst thing the ritual could have called for so you were grateful. Feeling you kissing back, his other hand moved to grip the back of your neck as he deepened the kiss and you found yourself melting into him, allowing yourself this one moment to give into the urges you’d been feeling as there was a reason for it. He moaned softly into the kiss and it sent a jolt right through you as his tongue tangled with yours and you felt like you might pass out. It felt like you were glowing from the inside out. He broke away and you felt a pang of disappointment as you both panted and he rested his forehead on yours. Your head was spinning, heart going a mile a minute as you tried to push past what just happened as it didn't mean anything.

“Did it work?” you asked softly, a slightly dazed tone to your voice. He was just staring at you and you felt like you were getting lost in his almost black eyes until he pulled away completely, his hand letting go of yours. Now able to breathe, you both looked around and you were startled to see you were no longer in the temple at the castle. You were standing in the middle of a large field, trees scattered about either side of it. The colors were so much brighter than you were used to though and it caught you off guard. The green grass was greener, the color of the flowers more brighter than you’d ever seen and the night sky didn't look black like it did back where you were from, it looked the deepest blue you’d ever seen. It was beautiful.

“Where do we go?” you asked as your eyes landed on everything you could find as you marveled at the beauty of it.

“No idea, I’ve never been here before,” he replied and when you glanced at him, he seemed just as awed as you did.

“Maybe we should start there,” he suggested, pointing off into the distance and you followed his line of sight. He was pointing to what seemed to be a large stone temple, torches burning on either side of the stairs. It was a little distance away but you could still see it clearly.

“Feels like a good place to start,” you agreed, shooting him a smile when he looked at you. His face brightened, a somewhat bashful smile on his face as he nodded and you set off walking. You were trying to keep your mind off the kiss you’d shared and you knew it would take a while to scrub it clean from your mind. The first time had been easy enough to get over, you hadn't kissed him back. It had been no more than his lips pressed against yours for a brief moment but this time it had been a full blown kiss. The kind that made your toes curl and set your body on fire.

“Have you never met your mother?” you asked curiously, trying desperately to keep your mind focused on something else. He gave you a small smile that seemed a little sad as he shook his head.

“No, I wasn’t raised by her. I’ve only ever been able to talk to her in the temple but it's in my head, kinda like a mindlink, I guess,” he explained and you nodded. You felt a little bad for him, hearing the mild hurt in his voice when he said he wasn't raised by her. You knew the circumstance between your upbringings were wildly different but you knew what it was like to have no parents, you knew what that pain felt like. You weren’t really sure what to say to that and a strange silence settled over you both. You weren’t sure if it was the kiss that was making things feel so stilted. He’d been adamant in reminding you that it was for the ritual but you could hardly blame him after the way you’d reacted the last time he’d kissed you. He probably felt uncomfortable because he thought you felt uncomfortable.

It didn’t take as long as you thought it might to reach the temple and the pair of you climbed the big steps up and walked inside. The first thing you noticed before anything else was that while this was a temple, it almost looked like a home on the inside. And there lay on the bed was the Goddess herself. She was the most beautiful woman you’d ever laid eyes on and your knees wobbled in reverence to her, but what stood out more than that was how sickly and pale she looked. You looked to Billy quickly who was standing stock still beside you. His breathing was labored, eyes wide as he stared at his mother and you could practically feel the pain radiating from him. The Goddess glanced over, a small gasp leaving her lips before a wide smile split her face and she rushed to get up. She almost fell and Billy snapped out of his stupor as he hurried over to her, catching her quickly and helping her stand.

“Oh, William, my beautiful boy!” she beamed, looking up at him as she placed a small hand on his cheek. He gave her a watery smile, leaning into her touch as he gazed down at her.

“Mom… what’s wrong?” he asked worriedly, his eyes scanning her as you hovered uncertainly. You weren’t sure if you wanted to be noticed or not, not sure if you were really supposed to be here and it felt like a very private moment. To witness the King meeting his mother for the very first time and in not so great circumstances. He guided her to sit on the bed as he lingered near her as if he was scared she might fall again.

“It’s magic tampering with the moon. The vampires have been kidnapping witches and forcing them into using their magic,” she explained weakly and she wobbled a little, causing Billy to reach a hand out to steady her. He frowned deeply at the news and it made dread curl low in your stomach. It had been your own theory but part of you hoped there had been another explanation for it because this meant an escalation in the war.

“You need to save the witches, William. Not only because it's endangering the wolves, but the magic the witches are being forced to perform is killing them and the vampires plan to go through as many witches as it takes to keep the magic going,” she insisted as she stood. She was still a little shaky on her feet but she managed to stand on her own this time as she looked at him imploringly.

“They’re being held at an outpost in the Winding Forest. You need to save them,” she repeated firmly and he nodded.

She turned her gaze to you then and your breathing hitched. She started to slowly make her way over, Billy watching you both warily and you dropped to your knees, bowing your head quickly. You really couldn't believe you were in the presence of the Goddess herself.

“You can stand, Child. You need not kneel for me,” she smiled warmly and you blinked up at her carefully, eyeing the hand she held out for you. You took it with a shy smile and let her help you to your feet. You were taken aback when she cupped both of your cheeks in her warm soft hands and you had no idea what to say as your wide eyes stared at her.

“You’re a beautiful and brave warrior, Y/N. You have a fierce yet kind heart,” she murmured and you almost felt like you couldn't breathe. Her kind words felt like they touched your soul and you couldn't get your mouth to work to tell her thank you. She gave you another warm smile then, her thumbs brushing your cheeks before she stepped away and Billy came over.

“Can you… Can you reconnect her to her wolf?” he asked hesitantly and your head whipped to him in shock. You were surprised he’d asked such a thing, even if it was his mother. There were far more important things going on right now. You’d be a liar though if you said you weren’t touched by his request as you knew you’d never have the courage to do it yourself. The Goddess’s face fell then as she looked back to you for a long moment before she dragged her eyes back to her son.

“I can’t, William,” she frowned and Billy’s jaw tensed as he rolled his shoulder. You were caught off guard by the anger on his face.

“Why?” he bit out. He and his mother shared a look and you felt like you were missing something at the hurt all over his face. You didn't understand why he was so upset over this. Yes, you were disappointed but it was what it was. After staring at each other for a long moment, she turned her eyes back to you and she looked upon you with sympathy.

“I can’t help, not yet. It will happen when the time is right,” she affirmed with a smile and you felt a spark of hope bloom in your chest. You felt so much relief at knowing it would happen one day, you’d started to think it would never happen. You’d gladly wait as long as it took if it meant it actually happened.

“Thank you,” you murmured, your voice wavering and small to your own ears.

“Everything happens for a reason, you should know that, William,” she said with a pointed look thrown his way. He still looked hurt and he rolled his shoulder once again with a curt nod. You still didn't understand his reaction, not when she’d just told you it would happen one day.

“You should both go and save the witches,” she insisted, backing away a little and Billy stepped closer to her.

“Can we come back?” he asked, a desperate edge to his voice now his anger seemed to evaporate. She gave him a sad smile.

“One day. You're not really supposed to be here, so use the ritual sparingly. You need not come and check in on me, I’ll connect with you when it’s done,” she assured and Billy’s face fell. You felt the urge to comfort him at the sadness that seemed to blanket him.

“Is there anythin’ else we should know? Anything that could help with the war?” he asked her hopefully and she shook her head once again with a sad smile.

“I can’t. It would tamper with fate and it’s bad enough what I have told you. I shouldn't be getting involved but I fear what would happen if this keeps going,” she explained regretfully and Billy nodded. You felt awful then as you watched Billy share a tearful goodbye with his mother. You tried not to watch such a private moment but you’d been unable to help it as she held him and stroked his hair as they said goodbyes. You could see how much he loved his mother and now he was once again going to part with her and he couldn't just come back when he wanted. You knew he missed her, that he found it hard being away from her. You could only assume it would hurt more now he’d met her finally in person. Once they parted, Billy sniffled and wiped his damp cheeks, giving you a somewhat embarrassed look as he walked to the door. You gave the Goddess a smile but before you could leave, she walked over to you once more. You hadn't expected her to give you a parting hug too.

“You're stronger than you think you are and worthy of more than you could imagine,” she whispered to you. She pulled away then, giving you a bright smile before she moved back over to her bed. You blinked at her for a long moment, once again stunned by her words and the fact that the Goddess had been the one to say them to you.

“Goodbye, Goddess,” you murmured, bowing your head in respect before you hurried outside to where Billy was waiting anxiously. The only word you could use to describe the look on his face was devastated and it made your chest ache as you got to the bottom of the steps. He seemed to be trying to hold himself together, not a word leaving his lips as you took off walking. Without thinking, you reached out and took his hand and his head snapped to you, eyes wide with shock. You gave him a tentative smile, hoping it would give him even the smallest of comforts to ease what it was he was feeling and you felt relieved when he smiled back.

“I want to go with you and your men to save the witches,” you said firmly after a while of walking hand in hand. He looked at you, licking his lower lip before nodding and you were glad he didn't argue with you on it. You wanted to help.

“The Vampire King won’t be there, he’d know we might come for him so it’s probably just gonna be some of his men, maybe some rogues,” he mused and you nodded in agreement. A very big part of you was itching for a fight and knowing the vampire assholes were using the witches the way they were, that they were killing them like they meant nothing, infuriated you. The Goddess had tasked you all with saving the witches and you took it personally. When you got to the clearing you’d arrived in, you both stopped and Billy let go of your hand and grabbed his dagger once more. You’d almost forgotten about the kiss with everything that had happened and you hadn't really thought about the fact you’d have to do it again to get back.

“You ready?” he asked and you nodded with a smile. He still seemed sad and you were both eager to get back to relay the news to the others and get going with the plan. He once again cut your hand and then his own, holding them together. His other hand came up and cradled your face as his dark eyes flit over your face in question. You gave him a firm nod, ready for it this time and then he leaned down, his lips connecting with yours. It didn't get intense the way the other one had, no doubt the heaviness settling over you both. Instead, his lips were soft against yours as he kissed you almost delicately and you kissed him back. This time, you felt the ground shift beneath your feet and it startled you, making you break apart and look to the floor. You were once again in the temple under the castle. You looked up at Billy and found him already watching you. He gave you a little smile before he let go of your hand and stepped backwards. You hoped the kisses wouldn't make things too awkward after you’d gotten your friendship with him back on track. These kisses had a purpose though and they’d served the purpose well.

“I’m gonna go update my men. Would you go and let Kosmos and Atticus know?” he asked.

“Yeah,” you nodded softly, giving him a reassuring smile. You both walked back up the temple steps and into the main castle before you parted ways. Your head was spinning and not just from the kisses you'd shared with the King. Knowing the vampires were indeed behind this and that they were using witch slaves left you reeling. You left the castle gates, letting your nose guide you to wear Kos and Atti were stationed and they both smiled when they saw you. They’d had no idea of the adventure you’d just had and you told them everything, except maybe about the kisses because you knew what Atti would say and now wasn’t the time. You explained what the Goddess said about the witches and the vampires and that you’d need to go and save them.

“I’m coming too. No way I’m sitting this one out,” Kos said firmly, fire dancing behind his eyes and it made you happy to know that he would fight by your side. You’d save the witches and at least take out some of the Vampire King’s men in the process.

“I need to leave. Aurora shouldn't be without me with everything that's happening right now,” Atticus frowned deeply, worry painting his face. He didn't even wait for a reply before he was off and you watched him leave with a frown. You'd expected him to agree with Kos, to tell you he’d be coming and fighting along with you as he always did. You hadn’t expected him to just go running away like this, backing down from a fight. The three of you were a force to be reckoned with out on the battlefield. You knew he was worried though and told yourself to let it go. She was his mate and things were really about to go to hell, of course he’d want to be with her, to make sure she was protected. You felt anticipation starting to thrum through you at the prospect of a fight, especially one against the vampires and rogues. You knew though that once you went to save the witches, that was it. Everyone knew a war was coming, you’d been on the cusp for a while, but this would be the catalyst for the war, the thing that started it all for real. This would set everything in motion and you knew things were about to get rough. You were ready for it though, even if you did end up dying in battle. You’d go out on a blaze of glory helping your pack and the King and you’d do it with a fucking smile on your face.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Such a Softer Sin (Part 8)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: I’m feeling generous so you guys get two chapters tonight. Maybe I’m also just excited to share this story with you since I worked so hard on it lmaooooo

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You blew out a sigh as you lay on the bed, legs dangling off the edge after you’d just done up your boots before any motivation left you. Faint hints of Atti were still clinging to the sheets and you tried to ignore how it comforted you and hurt you all at the same time. You hadn't seen hide nor hair of the boy since he’d met his mate and you tried to pretend it didn't hurt you. Especially after you mindlinked him to at least speak to him and he'd ignored you. In the days that passed, you’d locked yourself away in the pack house, refusing to come out in fear of bumping into the King. This morning though, Kos had told you that while he understands you wanted space, hiding away from everyone wasn't going to help you. He’d refused to bring you food like he had been doing, essentially forcing you to leave at some point. You knew he was right though, if anything you were probably making it even more awkward at your blatant avoidance of him. So you decided to be the big brave girl you knew you were and get ready to leave. Only now, you were back on the bed as anxiety gnawed at you. You chided yourself. You were known as The Dancer of Death and you were hiding because of a kiss? You growled at yourself, pushing up from the bed as you left before you could change your mind.

It was weird being back outside again as you stepped down the porch steps, eyes darting around. Everyone was milling around and doing their own thing once again and it looked like the warriors were training. They seemed to do that every day you noticed. You steeled yourself as you tried to figure out what to do with yourself. You could go and look for Kos, see what he was up to. Prove to him you weren't being a little baby and still hiding out. You set off looking for him, just enjoying walking around in the fresh air after being cooped up for the past couple of days. The sound of laughing drew your attention, eyes going over to the warrior housing. Atticus and Aurora were there with a few other warriors, all laughing and having a good time. You stayed rooted to the floor, eyes burning into him and as if he could feel them, he turned your way. He blinked at you for a moment before he looked away, no wave, no smile, no nothing and your jaw clenched, annoyance stabbing right through you. It only got worse when Aurora’s eyes looked over at you before she murmured something to Atti and he nodded and the pair left inside the building.

“Y/N,” a voice called softly, a voice you knew and it made your whole body seize up as you turned around warily. The King stood before you, a concerned look on his face as his obsidian gaze seemed to dart all over you.

“Your Majesty, I’m sorry, I was just leaving,” you muttered, giving him a fake smile. You really didn’t want to have to deal with this right now. You moved to rush around him and he gripped your wrist, stopping you going anywhere as he turned you around again.

“Please don’t walk away,” he pleaded, his voice almost a whisper. He said it so sincerely that you felt your chest ache as you looked at him. You were being childish and you knew you were. It was a kiss and you were acting ridiculous. The least you could do is speak to him and hear him out. You found yourself nodding and he let you go.

“I’m sorry about the other night. I’m not gonna stand here and lie to you, I find you attractive but I don’t think of you like that. Not like the other women, I don’t want you for one night like that. I just… I feel like we connected or some shit, like-like I’ve known you forever which I know sounds weird, but it’s different with you. I misread the signs and I made a mistake, it won’t happen again, alright? I care about our friendship and I don’t want to ruin that, not over a stupid mistake,” he rambled imploringly, eyes pinned on you, large and wide. You were still pretty confused as you took in his words. He didn't really say he didn't see you that way at all. In fact he told you he found you attractive and that he didn't want you for one night. Did that mean he wanted you for more? You’d admit the temptation was there with him, how could it not be? But you promised yourself you’d save yourself for your mate so starting anything was pointless. A snide voice in the back of your head told you your mate was probably dead so it was useless and all you were doing was denying yourself comfort in the arms of another. You ignored it though. Even if your mate was dead, you doubted his would be. You’d heard him talk about his future mate, seen how much he wanted her, saw how much he would love her. When she came along, there was zero chance he’d stick around with you. You’d be lost in the wind much like where Atti had left you after finding his mate and you didn’t want that. You’d much rather just stay friends and not get sucked into it, not wind up loving him for him to be taken away. Wolves could still love other wolves who weren't their mates, but as you said to Kos, it gets messy which is why most didn’t bother. You shook your head at yourself. He’d kissed you once and said he found you attractive and you were already thinking about love like an idiot. He’d even said it was a mistake. And he was right, you didn't want your blossoming friendship with him ruined over a kiss that clearly meant nothing. You’d already lost one friend, your best friend, you didn't want to lose another. His voice broke you out of your thoughts, his face concerned by your lack of words.

“Do you think… Do you think we could move past this? Pretend it never happened?” he asked pleadingly. You doubted you could forget about it but you did want to move past it so you nodded.

“Yeah, I’d like that,” you admitted. His body sagged in relief, a bright smile gracing his face and you felt like it blinded you. He looked over his shoulder at the training area before looking back at you, seeming much more his cheeky and charming self that he hadn’t been moments before.

“Do you wanna go train with my guys? They’ve all been excited to meet the infamous Dancer of Death,” he smirked wryly and you snorted, cheeks heating up a little.

“Sounds good to me,” you shrugged with a smile. If you were honest, the idea of a fight made you thrum with anticipation. It had been far too long since you’d felt the thrill of a real fight and you decided your scuffle with the vampire that jumped you didn't really count. While you didn’t officially start training until the week after, it would be good to get back into it.

You followed him over to the training area where he introduced you to the guys, some of them standing around, some of them sitting on the benches. He’d even introduced you to Micro, his Delta who you hadn’t yet met. Everyone was pleasant as they smiled and said hello, some of them telling you they were happy you were here. Honestly, they treated you like some sort of celebrity and you didn't know how to feel about it all.

“Alright, who wants to fight her first?” Billy asked as he stood next to you, eyes sweeping across his men. It was so silent you could practically hear crickets chirping, the men looking to one another with pale and horrified faces and your lips twisted into a smirk at the idea of them being terrified.

“Seriously? You really gonna embarrass me like this?” Billy asked dryly, shaking his head in disappointment and you grinned.

“Why don’t you fight her?” Micro asked with a shit eating grin. Billy tilted his head as he turned it to you, a raised brow being directed at you and a smug smile. You snorted with a roll of your eyes.

“I’m game if you are,” you smirked and his eyes lit up. He walked over to the rack that had weapons on it, grabbing two swords before he came back over to you and handed you one. You tested the weight in your hand for a moment, squaring yourself up as you faced him. He looked almost as excited as you were for the fight and you flashed him a wicked grin that made him smirk.

“Ready? Go!” Micro yelled and Billy swung his sword at you but you blocked it quickly with your own. The sound of metal striking metal was harsh in your ears as you both struck and blocked. It felt like your blood was singing, a bright smile on your face as you danced around him, twirling around gracefully as you struck out your sword, never letting his blocks defeat you. You knew he was taking it easy on you, you weren’t that stupid. He could easily take you out in a heartbeat with how strong and powerful he was, but it wasn’t lost on you that he was going at you harder than you’d seen him do with his men. He was putting in more effort and the idea that you were a stronger fighter and required more of his effort made you feel a little proud of yourself. You were enjoying the fight, chest heaving as the pair of you grinned and didn't give up. You went to strike out at him and he moved to block it but you quickly moved your sword, ducking and spinning out of the way of his own blade. As you turned, you used your other hand to grab his wrist and twisted it hard, making his sword fall from his hands and then your own was pressed to his throat. He stood there still, head raised with his throat bared with the tip of your blade digging into his skin and you smirked widely at him. At first, a part of you thought he’d let you win, although you’d never seen him let any of his men win a fight. But then you saw the look of utter shock on his face, his wide unblinking eyes as he stared at you and you started to think maybe you’d caught him off guard. You took the sword away from him as you stepped back, everyone cheering for you and some jeering at the King in jest and he gave you a lazy smile, his own chest heaving much like yours.

“I wasn’t expectin’ that,” he admitted, looking impressed and your smile widened at his praise.

“You should be prepared for anything,” you raised a teasing brow at him and he gave you a mock dirty look.

“No one’s ever beat me in training before,” he murmured, almost looking perturbed by the notion and you snorted.

“Maybe you’ve just met your match,” you grinned and he chuckled, looking at you with a fond smile.

“Yeah… maybe I have,” he agreed, sounding amused. You walked over to the rack, putting your sword back as you came down from the high of the fight. You felt weightless now, felt so much better and less tense. He came with you, doing the same and you glanced up at him briefly.

“I think I’m gonna go find Kos, see what he’s up to,” you said softly and he nodded. You weren’t sure if you imagined the flit of disappointment that flashed across his face.

“Alright,” he nodded, watching you with rapt attention.

“Thanks… for the fight. I really enjoyed it and I think I needed it,” you murmured ruefully and it made him smile with a nod.

“Don't gotta thank me, it was a good fight. I knew you were good but I didn’t think you were that good,” he admitted and you grinned to yourself.

“You still could have beat me though, you could have handed my ass six ways to Sunday and we both know it. You were taking it easy on me,” you snorted knowingly and he smiled bashfully, looking away for a minute. His eyes went back to you then, watching you for a small moment.

“Will I see you at dinner later?” he asked and you nodded.

“Yeah, I’ll be there,” you agreed with a smile. His face brightened up then and with that, you decided it was time to leave.

You were really starting to think you could move past what happened with him now. You enjoyed being his friend, enjoyed his company and it meant more than whatever the alternative was. It didn't need to be awkward or weird, you’d just proved that by having fun with him. You were glad that things hadn't been ruined completely. You looked around for a while for Kos with no sign of him until Azalea told you she thought he went into the pack house not too long ago. You made your way back there and when you walked in, you saw Kos sitting on the sofa looking deep in thought.

“You look like you're thinking, which is never a good sign, what is it?” you muttered wryly as you moved to sit next to him. His lips quirked up a little but he still looked thoughtful before he turned to you.

“I’m worried about Atti,” he confessed and your back straightened.

“Why? What happened? Is he okay?” you rushed out and he gave you a look.

“He’s fine, nothing’s happened it's just…” he trailed off and you relaxed a little but his silence concerned you. You squinted at him and he sighed.

“I know it's normal for new mates to spend a lot of time together but it's customary to at least introduce your new mate to your pack before you just disappear. The new mate is supposed to get to know the rest of us and he’s just locked himself away with her with the warriors. I went to go and see him, check in with him and he just… wasn’t himself. No cheeky remarks or sass, it was like talking to a robot. And when I asked if I could at least meet his mate, he went back into the room and I heard him ask her but she said no. I don’t get it, she doesn't seem interested in making an effort at all and he’s okay with it. Then Atti comes back out lying saying she doesn't feel well and that they're both going away for a few days. No mention of where or why,” Kos ranted and you frowned as worry gnawed at you. You had to admit, Atti’s mate wasn’t exactly making a good first impression and this wasn’t your bitterness from feeling like he was being taken away from you talking. All of that aside, Kos was right, she was supposed to meet you all and make an effort and after seeing Atti outside before, you wondered if she had anything to do with Atti pulling away so completely. You tried to tell yourself they were just newly in love and wanted to spend every waking moment with each other, that maybe you just didn't get it. But he’d seemed fine mingling with other wolves, the warriors specifically. It was just you guys he was avoiding and it made you feel weird and you didn't like it.

“That’s it, I’m going to talk to him. I’ll knock some sense into him if I have to,” you huffed as you stood up.

“Good luck,” Kos murmured wryly and you nodded, giving him a sardonic smile before you left once again. You knew the mate bond was strong, an instant connection of love, but it didn't brainwash people. It didn't change who they were as a person, it didn't make them act like this. Atti had no excuse for how he was acting and you were going to let him know. You made your way over to the warrior housing and slipped inside but you had no idea where the hell to go. You saw one of the warriors who had caught your fight with the King as he walked past, giving you a smile and bowing his head to you.

“Do you know which room Atticus and Aurora are staying in?” you asked him before he could leave. He looked startled that you’d spoken to him before he nodded.

“It’s room 303, upstairs,” he supplied simply and you nodded, but before you could go, he spoke again.

“They’re not here though, they left not too long ago. They won’t be back for a few days,” he added. You blinked at him slowly, a deep frown creasing your brows and he looked at you warily.

“Thanks,” you muttered and he nodded, giving you one last look before he scurried off. Your top lip curled into a snarl, your hands clenched to fists as you took a deep inhale. He’d left without even saying goodbye, something he never did. You hated this, hated how he wasn’t the same person you knew only days before. If this was what the mate bond did to people then you were glad not to have one, but you knew it wasn't true. You knew enough mated wolves to know that the bond didn’t do this, this was his own decision. It stung like a bitch.

You stomped out of the warriors housing and stalked across the grounds, on your way to tell Kos he’d already left. As you walked past the castle, you saw Frank standing there.

“What’s up with you?” he asked curiously, taking in your thunderous face. Your mouth opened, ready to rant to him about how your best friend had turned into a bitch that dropped his family the second his mate turned up but you snapped your mouth shut as you remembered this was the King Beta and he had no desire to be in the middle of your little drama.

“Nothing,” you huffed and he snorted, looking at you like he didn't believe you at all.

“It's just…” you trailed off with a mix of a growl and a sigh, your eyes drifting to the gate where Atti would have left not too long ago before back to Frank with a frown. He looked at you sympathetically before he moved to sit on the stone steps of the castle, patting next to him and you moved over. You plonked next to him heavily with a deep sigh, leaning your arms on your legs.

“Let me guess, Atticus and Aurora, right?” he asked knowingly and your eyes cut to him quickly.

“How did you guess?” you asked, half shocked, half amused and he smiled.

“I’m observant, it's my job to be. Didn’t escape my notice how he’s avoided you and your pack like the plague since he found his mate,” he admitted and you nodded, looking away again.

“He’s not acting right and I keep telling myself that maybe I just don't get it. I don’t have a mate so maybe I just don’t know how it really feels,” you shrugged despondently and he eyed you for a long while.

“I can’t tell you why he’s actin’ this way. Everyone’s different I guess and yeah, you wanna spend time with your mate but he is actin’ weird and the bond doesn't make that happen. Maybe just talk to him when he gets back,” he suggested softly and you nodded.

“Don’t worry, I plan on it,” you muttered and he chuckled at the underlying threat in your voice.

“I heard you beat Bill in a fight,” he grinned and a smile tugged at your lips as you remembered.

“I did, although he took it easy on me so I’m not sure it counts,” you snorted.

“Nah, it counts. Shoulda seen his face when he told me, he couldn’t believe it. About time someone took him down a peg or two, can’t have the King’s ego gettin’ out of hand,” he teased and you let out a laugh.

“I guess I’m doing everyone a service then,” you mused playfully and he grinned. A comfortable silence fell over you both then as you watched everyone go about their day.

“Alright, I should go, I gotta go find Karen,” Frank murmured tentatively as he looked at you. You gave him an appreciative smile with a nod.

“Thanks for talking with me,” you replied and he shot you a grin.

“Nah, it’s all good. You’re part of the family now, it’s what we do,” he smiled warmly, patting your leg before he stood and made his way inside the castle. You smiled to yourself for a moment but it soon faded as you remembered about Atti. A part of you wished you’d never come here so he hadn’t found his mate and you knew it was spiteful but you couldn't help it. His mate was making no effort, even going as far as turning away Atti’s alpha when he asked to meet her and it was just blatant disrespect. You were more mad at Atticus though. He was your best friend, been with you through thick and thin. You’d already been worried you were losing him but this was way worse than you’d anticipated and you didn’t understand it. You couldn't shake the fact he’d left without a goodbye, he never once did that and it felt so unlike him that it made your insides ache. Things were simpler before you came here and you yearned for those days back. Days where everything made sense and you weren't being pushed away by the one person who meant the most to you.

—--

Billy’s fingers tapped on his desk, eyes scanning over the words on the page, yet his brain couldn’t register them. He was restless and he’d tried to read the same line for the past ten minutes but he was too preoccupied. He could feel your unhappiness and it was bothering him, he didn’t like it. It wasn’t too strong but it was enough he could still feel it. It made him want to crawl out of his own skin and all he could think about was why. Why were you upset? Were you okay? He growled to himself, tossing the paper down on the desk as he admitted defeat. He wiped a hand over his face, leaning back in his chair with a heavy sigh. His mind drifted to the kiss just like it seemed to do often since it happened and he cursed himself. He couldn't say he regretted it completely, though he had been terrified he’d ruined everything with you before it had even started. But it had been amazing and he kept wondering just when he’d get to do it again. He’d even asked Karen if there was possibly a spell that could connect you to your wolf again but she said she didn't know of anything, told him she’d try to look into it though. When you'd admitted to him that you’d lost your connection after what happened to your pack, it had overwhelmed him with sadness. And sure, part of it was because it meant you wouldn't know you were mates until you connected again, might never know if it never happened and that terrified him. But he was also sad for you. He could tell you were hurt over it, saw it all over you how much you missed that and he couldn't blame you. He couldn't even imagine losing his connection with his wolf. Asking Karen hadn’t been purely selfish, it had also been because he couldn't stand to see you hurting like that. He wanted to help you and the idea of him being the one to give you that back made his chest burn hot. The full moon was in a few days and he wondered if you’d know once you shifted, that the one time your wolf would be out that it would recognise him. If he really thought about it, there was a high likelihood that you’d know when you shifted but he had no clue as to what would come after. A pit formed in his stomach when he thought about it. He had no idea how you'd feel when you shifted back if that was the case, you’d know that this whole time he knew and never told you but he hoped that maybe you’d be understanding about it. He’d been surprised that you hadn't judged him for the other women but he had no idea if you’d still feel that way once you realized you were mates. Maybe you didn’t judge him but maybe you’d be hurt. There was a possibility that you would reject him once you knew, once you shifted back. And maybe it wouldn't be because of the other women but you wouldn't feel anything in your other form. It made him feel sick and he tried to push those treacherous thoughts from his mind, knowing it would do him no good. He’d have no idea what the hell would happen until it happened and working himself up wouldn't help anyone. He felt your sadness pushing at him again and he sighed. He couldn't focus up here anyway with this gnawing at him and he knew it would only get worse the longer he sat there, so he got up and left his office, following the pull to you.

He found you in the garden sitting by the fountain. You didn't seem to notice him as you stared at the flowing water, a look on your face that made his chest feel like it was caving in. He watched you for a moment, taking in how beautiful you were even when in the throes of misery before his feet carried him over. You glanced up at him then as he sat down next to you and you gave him a smile that didn’t quite reach your eyes before you looked away again.

“What’s wrong?” he asked softly. You didn’t reply for a moment and he was starting to think he wasn’t going to get an answer, but then you spoke.

“Atti left for a few days with his mate, didn’t even say goodbye. And I know it sounds stupid but he never does that. He’s pulling away worse than I thought he would and I hate it,” you muttered sadly and his hands itched to reach out and hold you. He was a little surprised to hear that Atticus had left that way, he hadn't even been told he and Aurora left and usually they had to clear it with him since he was in charge and she was one of his warriors. He decided to give them some leeway since they were new mates. He could tell you were slighted by it and he remembered the things you’d said at the lake when you confessed to being hurt over him finding his mate. He knew those feelings well, experienced it with Frank.

“It’s probably a mate thing,” he mused and you hummed softly, not looking convinced. He didn’t really know why Atticus was behaving the way he was, the only thing he knew was that he wanted you to stop feeling so sad.

“If I found my mate… I wouldn't want to let her go. I’d wanna be with her every second of the day, keep her with me. It’d hurt bein’ away from her, even for only a few moments. Maybe he’s feelin’ that way right now, especially with it bein’ so new. I imagine it’d be overwhelming findin’ your mate, the feelin’s hittin’ you all at once. That shit’s gotta be jarrin’ to be sprung on you like that,” he murmured, eyes glued to you unable to help it. It was exactly how he felt and it was tearing him apart from the inside out because he couldn’t have those things because you had no fucking clue you were mates. You inhaled deeply before turning your eyes to him once more and just like every single time you looked at him, he felt like he was plummeting off a cliff at a rapid pace.

“You’re probably right, maybe I just don’t get it. I’m just overthinking and maybe I’m still upset over it all, looking into it all too deeply,” you admitted with a small frown. He was about to reply to try and comfort you but you continued.

“I just… I think some of it is the fact I probably won't ever find my mate. I thought it was all about Atti, all about losing a friend and it’s definitely part of it. But now I keep thinking that… that I’ll never have that, I’ll never be loved that way. I’m pretty sure my mate was probably in my old pack which means he’s dead, so I’m just stuck alone forever while I watch everyone else find their mates,” you bit out and he could hear the hurt lacing your voice. He desperately wanted to tell you the truth. To tell you that you wouldn't be alone, that you would be loved that way, you already were. He couldn't tell you though, not yet, you weren't ready. You wouldn't be until you felt it for yourself because him just telling you that you were mates meant nothing if you didn't feel a damn thing.

“I don’t believe that,” he said firmly and your eyes snapped to him.

“I think your mate is out there somewhere and he’d love you like no one else. He's out there just waitin’ to find you so he can give you all the love he has to give,” he muttered insistently, his chest aching fiercely. Your eyes were wide in shock at his words but then you smiled and it made relief flood his system that he’d made you feel even a little better.

“Thank you,” you breathed sincerely and he smiled down at you.

“If you want, I can try and put in a good word with my mother?” he suggested playfully and this time he earned a laugh that set him on fire from the inside out.

“I wouldn't say no,” you grinned and you seemed to relax a little. He felt your unhappiness easing, making way to a more content feeling that calmed him. He found it soothing and it was much better than the uncomfortableness he’d felt when you were sad.

His eyes drifted to the fountain as a comfortable silence blanketed you both and he remembered the last time you’d both been sitting here. He’d been taken aback when you’d blurted that you wouldn't sleep with him. He hadn’t thought he’d been so goddamn obvious about his interest in you and it had killed him that you thought that of him. That you thought that's all he’d want from you. What else were you supposed to think though? You’d heard the tales about him and it filled him with shame, of course you’d think that. When you’d opened up about your old pack and got upset, he’d used the mate bond to try and calm you. He hadn't been sure it would work given the fact you didn't seem affected by anything else concerned with the bond but thankfully, it had seemed to work. He was glad too as the pain he’d felt from you when you thought about your old pack was clearer and sharper than anything else he’d felt from you. Everything else was a hint or a whisper, but that pain would forever be seared into his brain. He could only imagine what you’d felt yourself given he’d only felt the smallest fraction of it. He hated that you felt that way.

“The warriors are puttin’ on a fight tonight. They do it every few weeks, entertain everyone here. It keeps spirits up. You should come,” he suggested, trying to forget the pain he’d felt from you and talk about something more lighthearted. The fights were a way for everyone to relax and everyone enjoyed them. He knew you’d like them and he was right as your face lit up at the notion and he couldn't tear his eyes off you.

“That sounds fun, I’ll definitely be there,” you grinned and he couldn't help the dopey smile on his own face, your excitement contagious.

“I’ll be fightin’ too,” he added with a smirk and you shot him a wry smile.

“Well lets hope you don't get beat again,” you replied teasingly and he scoffed, shaking his head with a fond smile.

“Nah, you're the only one to do it yet, I need to keep my reputation intact,” he snorted and you laughed again. He decided it was his new favorite sound.

That night, he was amped up for the fight. He could never unleash his full power on his men or he’d break them in half but it didn't mean he couldn't have fun and let off some steam. He’d been completely stunned when you’d beat him. At first, he’d taken it easy on you just as he would with his men, but he soon found you were a lot quicker and stronger than they seemed to be. He hadn't expected it, even knowing your nickname and what you had done. He'd been more than impressed as he pushed you more and you didn't falter at all. He’d been enraptured with you, so taken in by your grace and beauty, by how unbelievably deadly you were. And then you pulled a fancy move on him he hadn't seen coming and he was disarmed. Maybe he would have caught it if his brain hadn't started spiraling into the gutter seeing you wield a sword like it was the easiest thing. Seeing you laughing and smiling as you enjoyed the fight as much as he had. His head hadn’t been in the game and you’d beaten him, he’d been stunned. Frank had found it hilarious when he’d told him and he hadn’t heard the end of it since then. He was standing in the training area as the benches filled up with people, the fighters loitering around as they waited for their fights. He saw you walking over with Kosmos and you caught his eyes, sending him a bright smile that almost had him falling to a heap on the floor. He flashed you a grin, twirling his sword around with ease and you rolled your eyes playfully as you sat next to Kosmos on the front bench. He would be fighting first with one of his guys, opening the fight. He licked his lower lip, eyes darting to you as you and Kosmos spoke in hushed tones and before he knew what he was doing, his feet were carrying him over to you. You looked up with a smile as he stopped in front of you.

“Can I have your favor, My Lady?” he asked teasingly with a grin. You snorted but a shy smile graced your face and he loved having that effect on you.

“Of course, My Lord. I’m sure it’s the only way you can win,” you smirked and he squinted at you playfully. You looked around on your body, seemingly trying to find something for you to use. You wound up untying your corset and pulling out the gold lace, setting the corset next to you before you tied the lace around the base of his sword. Your fingers brushed his hand as he held his sword and he couldn't take his eyes off you, your face scrunched in concentration before you grinned triumphantly and moved away.

“Thank you, My Lady,” he smirked as he bowed, once again making you smile bashfully and he moved back into the middle of the training area. His eyes were drawn to the gold lace and he knew damn well why he’d given that to you. Why you and no one else. He’d started to worry Atticus had picked up on something when he asked about it and he’d been forced to reply in a joking manner to brush it off but his words had been truthful. He knew it was a dangerous game and he’d been expecting you to bring it up and ask but thankfully you hadn't. He didn't really know what to say to you if you asked him without opening a can of worms that he had no intention to open just yet. Micro came over as he announced the fight would be starting, riling everyone up and getting them ready for a good time. He stood there as the man he would be fighting, Lukas, stepped into the center too.

“Ready to get your ass handed to you, Your Majesty?” he asked with a smirk and Billy barked out a laugh. He liked Lukas, the man had served him for a long time. He never fought any of the newbies in these fights, that was saved for training where he could test them out, see what they needed to work on and what they were good at. But these fights were reserved for his most trusted warriors and those didn’t fear him like the newer ones did. They’d been with him long enough to know that if they were loyal and trustworthy, there was no need to fear him.

“I need to wash your mouth out with soap?” he asked teasingly and Lukas flashed him a toothy grin just as Micro yelled go. They swung at each other, the metal clashing loudly in the air as the fight began. He and Lukas circled around each other like sharks circling their prey as they fought. Billy was much quicker, faster reflexes and sharper eyes, catching each of Lukas' moves before he had a real chance to do anything. He found a delighted smile stretching across his face as he felt the familiar thrum of a fight running through his veins as the swords hit each other. He blocked each of the moves, letting Lukas feel like he was at least doing something even though he could have laid him on his ass in a second. But after a while and seeing Lukas start to get tired, he moved on the offensive. Of course he wound up winning, he always did. It was hardly a fair fight but it was still fun. He considered asking if you wanted to take part next time, maybe the pair of you could fight again. While it still wasn't an evenly matched fight, he knew it would be more entertaining for everyone here and it would be more fun for him too, being able to go a little harder and not hold back as much.

He took the golden lace off his sword before he put the sword back, two other fighters getting ready to fight now. He could have sat anywhere but of course he ended up going over to you. Kosmos was on one side and your corset on the bench next to you on the other. You grinned at him when you saw him, scooping up your corset to allow him to sit right next to you. He loved being close to you, loved your scent as it enveloped him. He had to resist the urge to stick his face in your neck and nuzzle you. He wanted to fucking drown in you.

“I guess my favor worked,” you mused playfully as he handed you the lace back.

“I think I woulda been really screwed without it,” he replied with a cheeky smile and you snorted. You put your corset back on, lacing it up with ease before you relaxed next to him. You were so close that your legs and arms were pressed together yet it still didn't feel close enough for him. You watched the fights together and he was happy you seemed to be enjoying it as much as he was. While you weren't heckling at his guys like he was, you would let out a pained ‘oooh’ when a painful hit landed or some awed remark everytime a good move was pulled off. You seemed really into it. He wondered what it would be like when you were Queen, how you’d both be watching these fights together all of the time. Maybe he’d do it more often since you seemed to like it so much, he didn't think he’d ever seen you so relaxed and carefree and he wanted to capture the moment forever. Sadly, eventually the fights all ended and people started milling about, some going to bed now it was late, others going off to do whatever it was they wanted to do. He really didn't want to leave your side yet, he wanted to keep basking in your presence. You stood up and stretched, Kosmos standing up next to you and Billy got to his feet as Frank came over. The four of you started walking back, Billy wanting to spend every second he could with you until you had to part ways to go to your separate destinations. He was smiling as you excitedly spoke about the fights to Frank and then Frank and Kosmos started talking about one in particular where one of his guys almost lost a goddamn eye. He felt happy, content, but then he felt a spike of anxiety hit him out of nowhere and it caught him so off guard, his steps faltered for a moment. He was confused until he realized it wasn’t him that was feeling it and his head whipped in your direction just as you stopped walking. You were staring up at the sky with a worried look painting your face and his eyes drifted up to see the moon before he looked back at you. Kosmos and Frank had stopped too now.

“What’s wrong?” he asked with a frown and your eyes drifted to him.

“Is it just me or does the moon look like it's waning again?” you asked slowly and the four of you all looked back up to the sky. Billy felt dread settle in his stomach like a stone as he realized it did indeed seem smaller. He was confused and worried, it was hardly normal for the moon to go in reverse like this and he had no idea what the hell was going on.

“I need to go speak to my mother,” he muttered tensely, not even sparing you all a glance before he took off running to the castle. Whatever this was, it wasn't good. He could only hope his mother could shed some light on it.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Such a Softer Sin (Part 7)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: I know I’ve not been replying to the replies on my chapters, but trust me I’m reading them and you guys are making me so happy. I love seeing what you all think and getting so invested in the story. My energy levels have been below zero lately, my fibromyalgia is kicking my ass to the moon and back. What little energy I’ve had, I’ve been writing songs when I told myself I’d continue to get at least one of my other Billy WIPS done while I have the time so you’ll have something to read after this one. I’ll get there eventually lmao

Also, happy birthday to @promnightbinbaby (if it's still you're birthday, time zones and all that loooool)

—--------

It was the next day and you were sitting on the porch steps of the pack house with Kos. You’d both been watching as your people mingled with the King’s, introducing themselves and getting settled in here, it was nice to see. You’d been worried most of all about Viron with how skittish he could be, worried he might hide away in the house. His brother hadn’t let him though, taking him around as they met people and you could already see him relax as he actually spoke to people not from his own pack. It made you smile, you knew this would be good for him. Kos was just telling you the training schedule you’d start in a week that the King had given him when Atti rushed over, face slightly pale and your back straightened.

“What happened?” you asked quickly, ready to fight already if you needed to. Hell, you’d take on the King himself if he’d done something to hurt Atti. He glanced from you to Kos, shifting on his feet as his mouth floundered for a moment.

“Spit it out, Atti,” Kos growled, but you could hear the worry in his voice as you both looked up at him.

“I found my mate,” he blurted. Shock hit you in the face and both you and Kos just stared at him for a moment. A smile split your face as you felt happy for him but it faded when he just stood there with a worried look on his face.

“Is that a bad thing?” Kos asked slowly, raising a brow.

“I don’t know, I guess not,” he muttered in reply and your eyes narrowed a little.

“What’s her name then?” you asked, wondering why he was being so weird about it.

“I don’t know, I didn’t speak to her. I… ran off,” he admitted and you and Kos looked at each other before you both burst out laughing.

“It’s not funny, guys!” he whined, almost pouting as you tried to catch your breath.

“I’m sorry, but you ran away? She’s your mate, you idiot! Why didn’t you just speak to her?” you asked incredulously.

“You do realize you're supposed to run towards your mate, not the other way?” Kos asked teasingly and Atti squinted at him.

“I’m well aware, thank you very much. I just… panicked. I don’t know. She’s one of the Warriors here. I saw her and I just…” he shook his head looking like a spooked horse and you and Kos shared another look before you both stood.

“Right, come on. Let’s meet her then,” Kos grinned. Atti’s protests died on his tongue as Kos grabbed him by his collar and started dragging him along with you both.

As you got closer to the castle, you noticed the King and Frank.

“What's he done this time?” Frank asked ruefully and Atti whined.

“This idiot just found his mate and ran away from her, didn’t even ask her name,” Kos snorted and both the King and Frank looked surprised before they smiled.

“Why the hell would you run away?” Frank asked with a chuckle.

“Because he’s a coward,” you teased, earning a dirty look from Atti.

“I’m not a coward!” he defended weakly and Kos released his hold on him. He smoothed his jacket out, pouting at you both.

“You met your mate and ran away. You didn't speak to her, didn’t even get her name. You didn’t tell her you felt it too. You're either a coward or far more stupid than I thought you were, take your pick,” you smirked at him and he shot you a dirty look.

“What's her role here?” Frank asked curiously and Atti sighed, looking off wistfully to the training area.

“One of the Warriors. She’s over there,” he pointed to a woman with jet black hair who was sparring with someone. You noticed she kept glancing over and you smirked to yourself.

“Come on, I’ll introduce you,” the King grinned and Atti paled. Kos shoved him over to the King who’s smile turned more into an amused grin at the state of him. You watched on as Atti obediently followed the King over to the girl and you all watched, unable to hear with the distance as the King seemed to introduce them. The girl seemed happy and before long, she and Atti were chatting up a storm. The King strolled back over then, looking pleased with himself.

“What’s her name?” you asked curiously as he got back to you, Kos and Frank.

“Aurora,” he supplied, glancing over his shoulder at them as they sat on one of the benches while they spoke. You hummed with a nod, smiling to yourself.

“As much as I’d love to stay and chat, we’ve got some stuff to take care of. I’ll see you at dinner,” he smiled down at you. You gave him a smile back before Kos also left to do the rounds and check everyone was doing okay. You sat on the stone castle steps for a while, watching Atti and his mate get to know each other. The happiness you were feeling started to rapidly dim though as the reality set in about what this meant.

Atti was your best friend, out of everyone, you were closest to him. You’d been raised together, best friends since birth practically and even after your pack was wiped out, it had been just you two until you stumbled across Kos. It had always been you and Atti against the world but now he found his mate. You were no longer the most important person in his life and you knew it was incredibly selfish but you started to feel panicked over it. You were happy he’d found his mate, both of you wondering if you never would, but things would change now. He’d no longer be sharing a room with you as it was hardly appropriate, he wouldn't spend so much time with you all because he’d be with his mate. Especially at first, when the honeymoon period was there. New mates often hid away and spent time with each other away from everyone else for a while. A part of you felt like you’d lost him and you knew it was selfish. It made you feel guilty and you didn’t like it. Unable to watch any longer, you went off to the pack house to feel sorry for yourself. You hoped the feelings would ease, telling yourself it was just the shock of it. It had come out of nowhere and you’d hardly been prepared for it. But the feelings didn't ease. As you lay on the bed with his scent, you couldn't shake the deep grief that was taking hold of you even though he hadn't died. You told yourself you were being ridiculous but you felt like you were lost out at sea. He wouldn't have time for you anymore, wouldn't have time to make you smile or laugh, to bicker with you. Wouldn't be there when you had a nightmare or when memories he also shared would plague you. He had his mate now, found the person he was supposed to spend his life with and they’d end up having kids and moving along with their life without you. You felt sick.

As the hours wore on, you worked yourself into a frenzy with your depressing thoughts and you felt the deep need for space and air clawing at you. You grabbed your furs, knowing it would be dark soon and you’d probably miss dinner but you didn’t care. You left the house, making a beeline for the gates where a guard was stationed. He gave you a smile and a nod as he let you out and you took a deep inhale, hoping it would ease your tension but it didn’t. You thought of the lake the King had mentioned and you wondered where it was. You sniffed the air, trying to catch the scent of the water and let your feet carry you there. It didn’t take too long to find it. It was beautiful as the sun started to go down, the sunset glimmering over the water that was surrounded by trees. You moved over to near the edge, moving to sit down heavily. Then you burst into tears. You felt stupid for crying over something like this when you should be happy for him but you knew you needed to let it out now or it would eat you alive. Things had never been normal with your pack, never normal between you, Atti and Kos. You’d never really thought too much about them finding their mates and what that would do to your friendship as you’d all figured the chances of finding them were slim to none. You chided yourself for being so selfish as you cried, angrily wiping your eyes.

Suddenly you were tackled to the ground, startling you out of your misery. Hovering above you with a dagger was what you scented to be a vampire. You growled as he tried to swipe at you and you knocked it right out of his hands. He caught your mouth with a punch and you shoved him off you, tasting the copper on your tongue as you let your sadness turn to anger, pouncing on him before punching him over and over.

“Why are you here?” you snarled, face of fury and blood coating your lips as you glared at him. He was bloodied himself, jostling as you shook him with the hold you had on his jacket and he laughed.

“Why are you? Your allegiance to the King will get you killed,” he smirked, his sharp teeth glinting in the dimming light.

“The only one getting killed will be your kind, vermin,” you hissed at him as you let him go. You towered over him, eyes burning as you watched him carefully. You knew you shouldn't kill him, he was here for a reason and it was best you deliver him to the guards to deal with. He lay there for a moment and you sensed it before it happened. He went to tackle you again but you moved, grabbing him and spinning him by his arm. Your leg came down hard on his knee and he screamed as it cracked, bending at an angle it shouldn't be. You knew he’d heal, quicker than a human would. It didn't mean he couldn't feel pain. You were angry now. Angry this piece of shit was here and what he was doing and angry he’d managed to get a jump on you because you were upset.

“You shouldn't have come here, vampire. Now the King’s going to have to deal with you,” you smirked down cruelly at him as he wailed in his agony. His eyes widened, trying to crawl away as he knew what awaited him but you grabbed him by his other foot, dragging him through the mud as he clawed at the ground, trying to stop you. He yelled the whole time, telling you that you were all dead, that the war was coming, the vampires would win. You tuned it all out, feeling like you were on the razor's edge of snapping and outright killing him with how you were feeling. The gates swung open as you arrived, the guards seemingly hearing the vampire's protests. You let him go as he whined and cried over his pain, the guards rushing over with wide eyes. It didn't take long for the King and Frank to rush over too. The King looked from the beaten and broken vampire to you, a deep frown gracing his face as he took in your bloodied lip and furious gaze.

“Take him to the cells,” he demanded, not looking at the guards he was talking to as his eyes were glued on you. The guards did as they were told as they started to drag the vampire away and the King took a few quick strides to you, eyes darting to your busted lip and then your eyes.

“What the hell are you doin’ going out there like that? We’re on the cusp of a war here,” he growled and you were taken aback by his harsh tone, but in your anger you felt defiance swell inside of you. Almost like you’d forgotten just who it was you were facing.

“I’m not a prisoner here, I didn’t sign up for that! I’m free to go as I please!” you yelled angrily, feeling all the eyes on you as you shouted at the King. He blinked at you for a moment, eyes flaring before he rolled his shoulder and sighed, lowering his head.

“I know that, I just don’t want you to get hurt, alright?” he frowned, his voice soft now and you felt yourself deflate. You wondered if part of you was hoping for a fight to make you feel better. You stood there as the adrenaline left you and you felt your lower lip wobble, making you clamp down on it as you swayed a little on your feet.

“I just… I just needed to get out of here for a bit, I went to the lake,” you murmured shakily, your eyes burning as you forced the tears away. The King watched you, his frown deepening for a moment.

“Come on,” he said, putting a hand on your lower back and guiding you back to the gate before you could argue.

“Where are we going?” you asked.

“The lake,” he supplied vaguely. You wanted to ask why but all the fight had left you so you just followed him silently as the pair of you made your way back.

He moved to sit in almost the same spot you had been earlier and you sat next to him, looking over at the water.

“Talk to me, Y/N,” he said quietly, drawing your eyes to him. He was looking at you with concern and you looked away quickly. You didn’t want to tell him, didn’t want to admit what a horrible and selfish friend you were. You felt him scoot a little closer to you, your arms basically touching and you looked back at him.

“You can tell my anythin’,” he added sincerely and it made you chest ache.

“I just…” your lower lip trembled and you frowned, looking down at your hands in your lap.

“I’m a terrible friend. I should be happy that Atticus found his mate, that he’s found his other half. But instead all I can think about is how that means I’ve lost him. That things won't ever be the same and I can’t shake it. He’s been a constant in my life for all of it and now he won’t be. He’s going to be too busy with his mate, I’m going to be an afterthought and I know that's how it should be, but it still hurts,” you admitted shamefully, unable to look at him. He was quiet for a moment but you were too scared to look at him to try and figure out what was going on in his head. You’d only just become friends with him, you didn’t want him to think so poorly of you.

“I get that. Karen’s Frankie’s second mate and none of us thought it would happen. After Maria… Me and Frank have always been close but it was different back then. He had a mate, kids… a family. And when he lost all that, it brought us closer together. It made it a little more bearable that we were both alone and then Karen turns up one day and that's it,” he started and you chanced a glance at him. He wasn’t looking at you, instead staring off at the lake, his turn to brood with a frown on his face.

“And I know I shoulda felt happy for him and I was, but it was… I felt like you do, felt like he was bein’ taken away from me, felt like I’d lost him and I was back to bein’ alone. And it went like that for a bit, you know how new mates can be. But it doesn't last forever. Once they get to know each other, once they settle down, things’ll be different. You’re not a bad friend for feelin’ that way, it's natural, especially with how close you guys are. It’s an adjustment and you’ll get through it like you got through everythin’ else life’s thrown at you,” he insisted, his dark eyes now turning to you. You were shocked by his admission but you felt relieved almost, like you connected with him over this. He didn't judge you, he’d dealt with the same feelings. And you’d seen how close he was to Frank and to Karen too. You wondered maybe if there was hope. If you’d let Atti and Aurora get to know each other, if he’d come back to you and you’d get to know her, let her in the family. It wouldn't be completely the same and you knew that but you also knew that was just how it went.

“Thank you,” you murmured, giving him a smile. The haunted look he was wearing seemed to evaporate right off his face at your smile and his whole body seemed to relax, a smile of his own on his face.

“Don’t gotta thank me, it’s what I’m here for,” he answered easily and you gave him a wry grin.

“Bein’ a therapist to your people?” you snorted and he chuckled, shaking his head as his eyes bore into you. He just watched you for a moment and it made you feel a little weird, your heart stuttering in your chest as his almost black eyes seemed glued to you. You were about to say something, anything to stop the weird staring contest that seemed to happen because it made you feel like you were tumbling off a cliff when his lips suddenly descended on yours. Your whole body tensed up, shock rushing through your system like a confusing mixture of fire and ice. But then your brain caught up with you and you pushed him away, eyes wide. He looked shocked himself, eyes wider than yours as his mouth floundered for a moment. You really couldn't believe he’d tried to kiss you, especially not after what you’d told him in the garden.

“I… I should get back,” you muttered tensely, still in shock as you jumped to your feet, your fingers over your lips.

“Y/N, wait!” he called out quickly. You barely made it a few steps before he’d seized your wrist and turned you around. He dropped your arm quickly and you stepped back from him, your head spinning.

“I’m-I’m sorry. I didn’t… I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I know that was inappropriate. I shouldn’ta done that,” he frowned, a desperate look on his face. You really couldn't believe after what you’d said to him, after him telling you he just wanted to get to know you as a friend that he’d do this. It left you feeling confused and upside down, especially when at first, a part of you felt like you wanted it.

“You might not care about saving yourself for your mate, but I do,” you bit out and his face fell, pain flashing over it and it made guilt swallow you whole. You hadn't meant for it to come out so harsh or judgemental because honestly, you didn't judge him. But it didn't mean you were about to go down whatever this road was. Atti had found his mate, maybe you would too one day. Your head was going around and around and you felt like you couldn't breathe.

“Goodnight, Your Majesty,” you whispered, turning on your heel and rushing off before he could stop you again.

You made a beeline for the house when you got back, rushing up the stairs and into your room where Kos was sitting on the bed reading.

“What’s wrong?” he asked with a frown. You leaned back against the door, everything overwhelming you and as you opened your mouth to tell him, you burst into pitiful sobs. He jumped up and hurried over, scooping you into his arms as he guided you to sit on the bed.

“What’s happened, Y/N?” he asked more firmly, stroking your hair as he rocked you back and forth. And you told him. You told him everything. You told him how you felt about Atti finding his mate and how guilty you felt, you told him about being jumped by a vampire because you were too upset to even think clearly and you told him about Billy. The conversation you’d had and that he’d kissed you. He’d comforted you about Atti, saying much the same as Billy had. That he would come around when he got to know his mate and they just had to wait. He’d been angry at the vampire thing but placated that the King had dealt with him. But when you told him about the King, he’d gone silent and you wiped your eyes, peering up at him.

“He shouldn’t have kissed you like that, but I don’t think he had bad intentions. I think he’s lonely and you don’t have a mate either. Maybe he felt like you connected over that or maybe he just got caught up in the moment,” he suggested softly. You nodded as you sat up straighter, taking in his words. You knew if Kos thought Billy had bad intentions, just wanting to bed you and then toss you away like a piece of used tissue, then he’d probably have a real big issue with it. King or no King, you knew it wouldn't matter.

“I just don’t know what to do. We have connected but this whole thing is dangerous. You know what it’s like when people get involved with someone who isn’t their mate. It gets messy and complicated if the mate turns up and this is the King. It would be easy to get attached to him in that way, he's an incredible man, but it’s not a good idea,” you confessed with a frown. If you really thought about it, there was a pull to him and you weren’t sure what it was. You were unsure if it was the allure only a Lycan Demigod could have or if it was about you both bonding over no mates and losing family. There was just a level of understanding between you both that seemed to blossom from nowhere and while you still didn’t feel 100% comfortable with him due to the fact he was the King, you thought you could call him a friend and maybe that awkwardness would go away in time when you got used to having someone so important and regal as a friend. But now he'd kissed you and things were weird for a different reason.

“You just need to think about what it is you want. You’re right, things can get messy if mates turn up but it’s also not a crime to be lonely and seek company from others feeling the same. I know you crave that type of companionship sometimes,” he started, making flames lick your cheeks that he’d picked up on it at some point.

“And I bet he craves it too, especially with him going so long without his mate. Whatever you choose to do, you know I’ll be by your side with no judgment,” he affirmed and it made you smile, warmth curling in your chest.

“I think… I think I just want to be friends with him. As tempting as he might be, nothing good will come from starting a dalliance with the King. Not just because one of our mates could turn up and it would be uncomfortable but… I value his friendship. What’s the point in starting something that will have an expiration date? Even if my mate never turns up because he’s dead or halfway across the world or he has to wait another hundred years for his, the flame won’t last forever because we’re not mates. Those relationships don’t last. I don’t want to develop feelings for him just to be hurt in the long run,” you sighed and Kos took your hand in his.

“Then stay friends and I’ll back you up,” he smiled warmly as you and you grinned before it faded and you let out a groan.

“I don’t know how to be friends with him now he kissed me. It’s just awkward and I don’t know how to handle it. Do I speak to him about it or just pretend it didn’t happen? Either option isn’t great and it’s still weird,” you muttered with a huff.

“Maybe just give yourself some space, think it over. He obviously finds you attractive but you're a beautiful woman, Y/N, he’d be stupid not to. Maybe he got caught up in the moment or maybe he misread the situation, but you said he was apologetic for making you uncomfortable, that he said he shouldn't have done it. He probably feels just as awkward as you do right now so maybe some space will help you both and you'll laugh about it together in a few days,” Kos advised and you nodded. You hoped so. He did seem mortified by what he’d done when you really thought about it so you didn't believe your initial thoughts that maybe this was his plan all along. The idea of the King being attracted to you though still made your head spin and you flushed at Kos’ compliment.

“Yeah, maybe a little space would be good. I need to get my head on right. I didn’t even know I wanted him to kiss me until he did it and now I feel all… blegh,” you sighed, making Kos smile ruefully at you.

“I just need to accept the fact it was a bad idea and move on from it, hopefully things won’t be so awkward,” you added softly. You still felt a little confused but you knew you needed to snap out of it. Thinking of the King in that way wouldn't do you any favors and if he hadn't kissed you, you’d have stayed blissfully unaware that you wanted that from him. Who wouldn't though? He was magnetic, full of charm and beauty. You’d fallen into the trap that many other women seemed to have fallen into before you and you knew you needed it to stop. You’d take some space and calm yourself, remind yourself of your place. It wasn’t by the King’s side and you weren’t interested in some casual fling with him that would eventually end and your friendship would be ruined. You’d rather have him as a friend than that. You found yourself wishing to speak to Atti about it too. While you appreciated Kos’ wise words of encouragement and support more than anything, you knew Atti would be a little more blunt and maybe you needed that harsh slap around the face of reality. For all his talk of you and the King, you knew he was just teasing and he didn’t really think it was a good idea. You knew what he’d say about all this. You knew he’d give you a little tough brotherly love about it and maybe that was what you needed so you could stop clinging to a wisp of a notion that anything could happen between you and His Highness. It was a bad idea, it was that simple. You weren't willing to get your heart broken by anyone, much less the King.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

So. I bought PG Tips cuzz tall, dark and handsome said so...

Fucking Bin Bons...

#ben barnes #makes me buy stuff #blame him #i dont fucking know #tea

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Wondering how popular bi!Billy is and if I should finish a WIP I have just undusted 🙃🙂

Yes I used this gif to get more answers. Sue me. 🤣🙄

#billy russo #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo imagine #billy russo x reader #billy russo x female reader #billy russo fanfics #ben barnes #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n #billy russo/reader

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Such a Softer Sin (Part 6)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: I have to say, I’m really quite touched with the response to this story. Every reply or reblog with your thoughts has really made me so happy. A lot of you have told me you love the world I’ve created and honesty, thank you for that. That was something I was worried about, not sure if I was any good at it and this story made me a little nervous with how different it is from my other things. I really appreciate all the support you’ve given me and I hope you continue to enjoy the story.

—-----------

You huffed as you lay on the bed, bored and miserable. You'd had a bad night's sleep all on your own, fitful and full of memories you didn't want. You'd woken early and just lay in bed most of the morning. You'd been hungry but in no mood to go to the mess hall for breakfast so you'd just stayed in your room. You'd forced yourself to get up and dressed but then wound up laying back on the bed doing nothing. You really hoped the guys and the pack would come here today. You didn't think you'd make another night alone, it was torture. You knew breakfast time had been and gone and you were regretting not going down for breakfast as your stomach growled loudly at you. You were startled out of your misery by a knock on the door. You sat up and stretched a little before walking over to the door and swinging the door open.

"Azalea," you grinned, happy to see a familiar face.

"Beta Y/N," she smiled with curtsy.

"You can just call me Y/N and you don't need to curtsy," you said with a rueful smile and she blushed with a nod.

"King William asked me to bring you this since you missed breakfast," she held out a basket you hadn't even noticed her holding and it was much like the one you'd been given on your first morning here with Kos and Atti, just less food inside. You took it with a grateful smile.

"Would you please tell him I said thank you?" You asked softly. You appreciated the gesture from him, especially since you were pretty hungry. You hadn't expected him to notice your absence at breakfast and you found yourself wondering if he'd thought you'd sit with him and the others again.

"I will," she nodded and you could practically feel her resisting the urge to curtsy again.

"Enjoy your breakfast, Y/N," she smiled politely and you toyed with the handle of the basket.

"Do you… do you want to share my breakfast with me?" You asked hopefully. You knew she'd probably already eaten but the idea of eating alone was depressing to you after the night you'd had and you liked her.

"Oh,” she looked surprised, eyes wide as she blinked at you.

"You don't have to, I know you're probably busy. I just…" you trailed off, a small frown creasing your brows.

"No, I'd love to," she said with a tentative smile. You knew she probably didn't get this offer a lot, if ever.

You moved out of the way to let her in and then moved to sit on the bed. There wasn't anywhere else to sit so she perched on the end of the bed and you set the basket between you. You grabbed a croissant, nibbling on it as she picked an apple. There was a weird silence that wasn't completely comfortable but also wasn't uncomfortable either. You started to feel a little guilty about asking her to eat with you, you should have known she wouldn't refuse and you almost felt like you’d cornered her into it. You really liked the girl, she was nice and kind and you wanted to know her better. She put you at ease in a way that made you enjoy spending time with her.

“You miss them, don’t you?” she asked knowingly after swallowing a bite of her apple. You glanced up after shoveling the croissant in your mouth almost whole, a stark contrast to the delicate bites Azalea was taking of her apple.

“Is it that obvious?” you asked wryly and her lips tugged into a smile.

“A little. But you seem close to them and you’re here alone. I can imagine it's a little unsettling,” she murmured softly. Despite being slightly embarrassed at being so transparent, you were glad she was openly talking to you because it meant she was starting to get comfortable with you.

“It is. This was my first night on my own, it didn’t really go great. But I’m sure they’ll be here soon,” you shrugged, grabbing the other apple from the basket as you started on it. It was delicious and juicy and as you munched on it, you made a little bit of a mess down your chin and your hands. You weren't sure how Azalea had managed to make it look graceful.

“Wow, these apples are amazing,” you snorted, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand.

“They really are. They’re grown in the Royal Garden, Miss Karen enchanted the apple trees so they grow year round,” she grinned. You didn’t remember seeing any apple trees but you hadn’t explored all of the gardens. You’d managed to ruin all of that before you’d sat down with the King as you had a heart to heart. You were glad things ended on a positive note even if you were still feeling a little shame faced at accusing him of wanting to bed you. You knew Atticus would have a field day when he found out that information.

“I know I already asked you if you liked working here, but what’s it like living here? Do you enjoy it?” you asked, trying to make conversation.

“I do. King William always makes sure I have everything I need and that I’m not overworked and I have family here too, so that helps,” she answered with a wistful smile.

“You have family here?” you asked curiously. If you were honest, you weren’t quite sure what the pack dynamic was here. Things were different for the Royal pack and there were far more wolves than any other pack. You knew a lot of the Warriors had come from other packs, coming here to train and become part of the Royal Military. You knew it was different in the sense that a normal pack would have generations and generations of the same families, new mates from different packs joining and bringing in new lineages. This pack constantly had new wolves joining, some leaving but if the pack was as old as the King himself, you could only presume there would be some families here too.

“My sister and her mate are here, they’re Elite Warriors. She’s taking a break right now though because she just had a baby, little Jason. He was premature,” she said softly.

“Jason’s your nephew? I saw him yesterday when Karen showed me the medical facilities. He’s so small and cute,” you murmured, a smile pulling at your lips as you thought of the baby.

“He is but he’s a fighter, just like his parents are,” she grinned.

“He is and he's in good hands,” you replied with a smile.

You both spoke for a moment longer before you moved to get up.

“I just need to wash up, I have apple juice all over me,” you said wryly and she snorted softly at you as you rushed to the adjoining bathroom. Just as you finished washing your hands, the door knocked.

“Do you want me to get that for you?” Azalea asked.

“If you don't mind,” you answered, drying your hands on the towel. You walked in just as she pulled the door open and there stood the King.

“Azalea…” he muttered, looking at her confused.

“Your Majesty,” Azalea rushed, head bowed and eyes averted.

“What are you doin’ here?” he asked, confused and you walked in the room properly.

“I asked her to share breakfast with me, I got a little lonely,” you snorted self deprecatingly, drawing his eyes to you. “I didn’t mean to get her into any trouble,” you added quickly, hoping you hadn't caused issues for the girl by simply asking her to spend some time with you.

“She’s not in trouble, it's fine,” he replied, eyes lingering on you with a soft smile before he looked at Azalea. She looked over to you then, a genuine smile on her face.

“Is that everything, Y/N?” she asked and you nodded.

“Thank you for spending time with me,” you murmured and her smile widened.

“Anytime,” she said before she curtsied to the King.

“Your Majesty,” she muttered politely before moving around where he was standing in the doorway and hurrying away.

“No matter how many times I tell her she don’t need to curtsy to me, she does it anyway,” he smirked ruefully and you smiled.

“What are you doing here?” you asked curiously. His eyes scanned your face and you took a moment to look at him. He looked as tired as you felt, only he seemed to be able to pull it off a lot better.

“Just wanted to check on you, you didn’t come for breakfast,” he shrugged.

“Thanks for breakfast, by the way. I enjoyed it,” you said with a sincere smile and a smile of his own painted his face.

“Don’t gotta thank me, just wanted to make sure you ate somethin’,” he replied easily.

“Well, I still appreciate it,” you replied with a grin. A weird silence settled over you both then as he just hovered in your doorway and you didn't really know what to say or why he was still here.

“You wanna talk about it?” he asked, a knowing look on his face.

“Talk about what?” you asked slowly, blinking up at him. He tilted his head as you, brows raised.

“Whatever’s eatin’ you up,” he supplied simply and you looked away quickly, a sheepish laugh leaving your lips.

“It’s… stupid,” you muttered, shaking your head. You felt embarrassment well up inside of you. You had a reputation for being a fearless fighter and here you were, sulking over being alone at night. He watched you for a long moment before he sighed.

“Come on, maybe some fresh air will do you some good,” he said firmly, giving you no room for arguments. You followed him out and down the stairs and the silence wasn't uncomfortable now. As you got outside, he stopped at the bottom of the front steps and you watched him curiously as he sat down. You sat next to him, looking out at the grounds and watching as people went by doing their day to day tasks. You felt eyes burning into you, turning to see the King looking at you. He quirked a brow and you knew what he wanted and heaved a sigh, looking back out at everyone else once more.

“I hate being alone. It’s always been me, Atti and Kos. Back after… what happened… when we found Kos, we used to live in a cave,” you started softly. His brows rose at that as he just let you get it out.

“It was always the three of us, huddled together to keep warm in the cold. And even when we got older, when we had the pack house that we built with our own hands from the ground up, it was us three. Even when others joined, we took the small room together to make sure everyone had enough space and we slept on the floor so people could have the few beds we had. I don’t like being alone, I havent had to be since I was eight and Atti saved me. Being alone now just makes me feel…” you trailed off with a deep frown, toying with your hands in front of you.

“Was a rough night?” he asked quietly and when you glanced at him he had a sympathetic look on his face.

“I think that would be an understatement,” you snorted and he smiled a little.

“Well, if it makes you feel any better, I had a rough night too,” he murmured as he looked at you.

“I can imagine. Being a King is a hard burden to bear,” you said softly.

“Ain’t that the truth,” he grinned ruefully and you smiled.

You opened your mouth to speak but the gates opened and your body tensed, eyes glued to the gate. You watched as carriage after carriage came in and a blinding grin split your face. The second you saw Kos step out of one, you took off running, leaving the King on the steps. You tackled him into a hug so hard he almost fell over and he chuckled.

“I missed you too,” he grinned as you held him tight, relief flooding your system. You clung on to him, letting his scent soothe you and you were too distracted to notice the King, Frank and Karen walking over.

“What, don’t I get a hug?” you heard Atticus snort and you moved away from Kos, smiling when you saw him. He grinned, opening his arms to you and you rushed over, squeezing him around the middle.

“Did you miss me?” he asked smugly.

“No,” you huffed into his chest.

“Well, that’s just rude,” he scoffed but you could hear his smirk. You moved away and gave Kosmos a look.

“If you force me to sleep alone again, I’ll have to challenge you for your Alpha title,” you shot him a toothy grin as his mouth hung open and Atticus started laughing.

“Please do, I think you’d win,” he teased and then yelped when Kos smacked him around the head. You heard your name being called out and looked back over to where all your pack members were getting out of their carriages. Viron was pushing through them all, a bright smile on his face and you hurried to meet him. He wrapped his arms around you and you held him tightly, happy to see him.

“Have you been okay?” you asked, not letting go and you felt him nod. When he pulled away, his eyes darted around, taking in the castle grounds.

“Welcome to your new home,” you murmured wryly and his lips quirked up.

“It’s nice… big, but nice,” he said softly, nodding to himself in approval.

“I think you’ll like it here,” you smiled warmly at him. You made sure to greet all of your pack members one by one with a hug and you were happy to see everyone here, you’d been worried some of them might put up a fight.

“If you’d like to follow me, I’ll show you to your new pack house,” Karen smiled at everyone before she led them away. Kos and Atti stayed with you.

“How did everyone take it?” you asked Kos quietly as you both lingered near the carriages. Some of the King’s men were getting out what little belongings you all had and taking it all to the house.

“Surprisingly well. As soon as I mentioned the medical facility here and how it would help Leanna, they all wanted to come,” he answered with a fond smile and it made warmth bloom in your chest.

“What’s it like?” Atticus asked from where he was casually leaning against the carriage. Your eyes drifted over to the building before back at him and Kosmos.

“It’s really good, they’re more than equipped for it. They have a little boy in there now who was born prematurely. He’s Azalea’s nephew,” you supplied and you saw them both relax. The King walked closer to you all then.

“Kosmos, would you be able to come with me to my office? I wanted to go over the training schedule for your pack, make sure you’re okay with it,” he smiled politely and Kos nodded.

“Of course, Your Majesty,” he said.

“I’ll catch you later,” the King smiled at you, warmer than he had at Kos and you smiled back with a nod.

Once he walked away with Frank and Kos, you felt Atticus’ eye burning holes through you.

“What?” you asked slowly.

“What? Really? You two looked pretty cozy,” he smirked, pushing off the carriage as you rolled your eyes. The pair of you slowly started walking to the pack house.

“We’re not cozy. I’ve spent a little time with him when you were gone, got to know him a little,” you explained with a shrug.

“Got to know him, huh?” he asked teasingly, a shit eating grin on his face and you swiped your leg out, making him cry out and tumble to the floor before he burst out laughing. You gave him the dirtiest look you could muster, but when he flashed you a wry grin, you rolled your eyes and helped him back to his feet.

“You’re the worst,” you muttered in contempt and he swung an arm around your shoulder.

“And you love me anyway,” he smirked, making you roll your eyes again but your lips tugged up anyway.

“Sooo…?” he raised a brow and you fought the urge to hurt him again.

“It’s not like that, Atti. I mean it. I told him in no uncertain terms that I won’t sleep with him,” you scowled at him and his feet halted, rooted to the floor as his arm slipped off your shoulder. He was gaping at you and you just blinked at him.

“What now?” you whined and he shook his head at you.

“You told him? The King? You told him you wouldn’t sleep with him? Do you want him to make you a head shorter?” he asked incredulously and you snorted.

“He won’t cut my head off just for that, Atti. He’s not like that. He’s actually really nice and kind when you get to know him. Besides, he wasn’t mad. He told me it wasn’t like that, anyway. That he just wants to get to know me, be friends. That he respects me, respects our pack. So you can drop your weird obsession with him, unless you want me to put in a good word for you?” you wiggled your brows suggestively at him and he gaped at you.

“He’s a good looking wolf, but I’m not interested. It’s not an obsession just ‘cause I can tell you want to jump each other’s bones. There’s no shame in it,” he smirked and you once again found yourself resisting the urge to throttle him.

“We don’t want to jump each other, just shut up,” you huffed, stomping away from him and to the pack house. He caught up with you, taking your hand and pouting at you.

“I’ll stop, you know I’m just teasing,” he murmured, practically fluttering his lashes at you.

“You better stop or I’ll make you sleep on the floor,” you warned, a mischievous smirk toying on your lips. He squinted at you, letting out a scoff.

“You can’t do that,” he muttered and your smirk widened.

“I outrank you, Atti and I know Kos would back me up. He’s sick of you hogging the blankets every night,” you snorted and he heaved a dramatic sigh.

“Fine, I swear I’ll stop,” he relented, although you could almost hear the ‘for now’ at the end of his sentence.

“The pack house has actual heated water, by the way. Oh, and electricity,” you grinned at him and his face lit up like the moon.

“Really?!” he asked and you chuckled, nodding. He didn't even wait for you then, breaking into a run to make the mad dash there and you rolled your eyes good naturedly.

As you got to the pack house, you could hear everyone chattering excitedly over how amazing it was as they picked their rooms and you made your way up to your room where Atticus was flicking the light on and off.

“What are you doing?” you snorted, moving to sit on the bed.

“It’s just… amazing. I can’t believe we live on castle grounds,” he murmured in awe, shaking his head before he moved to sit next to you. It made you smile though. It was a big adjustment and a war was coming but it was nice to find the wonder in small things.

“We’re going to have uniforms,” you told him after a moment and he wrinkled his nose, looking at you in horror.

“Uniforms?” he all but whined and you smiled.

“Mhm. The Kings already requested them to be made, so I'm guessing Kos already knew. Otherwise, how else does he know what sizes to have?” you asked with a shrug and Atticus pulled a face like he’d been betrayed in the worst way.

“Why am I not surprised? What are they like? Are they ugly? What color are they?” he asked in quick succession and you gave him a look.

“How would I know? Does it look like I’m wearing it?” you asked mockingly and he pinched your side, making you squeak and move away from him.

“A simple ‘I don’t know’ would have sufficed,” he huffed and you shot him a playful smile.

“Where’s the fun in that?” you asked, making him snort at you. You spent some more time with him before your whole pack, sans Kosmos who was still with the King, all gathered in the living area and you explained about meal times and all the other things you’d learned in your time here. The others weren’t too fussed about the uniforms, even when Atti tried to rally them to be on his side so they could ‘put in a formal complaint’ to the King. After that, everyone went about doing their own thing as they set off exploring the grounds. You and Atti stayed sitting on one of the ridiculously comfy sofas for a while before the door knocked. He didn’t move and you rolled your eyes.

“Oh, by all means, I’ll get it,” you snorted as you stood and he started laughing.

“You’re the one who’s been making friends here,” he replied teasingly and you grabbed a cushion, throwing at him hard. You answered the door to see Azalea who gave you a warm smile. She had a large cart with her.

“The uniforms are here,” she murmured and Atticus let out a comically loud whine from behind you and Azalea’s lips twitched up.

“Don’t mind him, he’s a little baby,” you smirked.

“No, I’m not,” he huffed, now standing beside you. “Hello again, Azalea,” he added, flashing her a toothy smile, a cheeky glint to his eyes and you rolled your eyes.

“Do you know how to behave?” you asked, exasperatedly and he turned to look down at you.

“Behave? What's that?” he asked mischievously and you groaned, leaning your head on the door frame as Azalea failed to hide her smile.

“Thank you for delivering them,” you said warmly, stepping out of the way as Atti walked out, looking at the sacks in the cart that had names on them.

“You’re welcome.” she replied with a smile. Atticus started to bring in all the sacks until all that was left was yours, his and Kos’. Azalea bid you both goodbye and you went back inside and he ripped his open and pulled out his clothes.

“It’s not too bad,” he murmured, eyeing it up and you sat down, opening your own. You looked over at him, noticing the only real difference to what you wore now and this was the jacket. The pants were black and the tunic was white, as you all wore now. But the jacket was the same pale blue as the clothes you’d worn when you’d had dinner, but with cream accents and not gold. You’d noticed in spending more time here that the only one to wear gold was the King and maybe he’d let you all wear it to dinner out of respect and as it was a celebration for you joining him. You got your own out, same black pants and white tunic. Your jacket was the same too, only tailored for a more flattering fit for you and he’d even had you a corset belt made. It was black but the laces were gold.

“Oooh, look at you with your fancy gold trim. Anyone would think you’re the King's favorite,” Atticus grinned teasingly and you shot him a look. His smile didn't fade though.

“I bet all the women have them,” you muttered and he grabbed one of the other bags, opening it and rummaging around. He yanked out the corset belt only to see the laces were blue and he raised a brow at you.

“Maybe it’s because I’m Beta or something. Kos probably has gold on his jacket,” you shrugged. He heaved a sigh and then you noted he was going through Kos’ sack too. He half pulled out the jacket, only to find it was just like his.

“Stop touching everyone’s stuff,” you scowled, wanting him to drop it. Honestly, you had no idea why you had gold and no one else did but it was only a color. You doubted it meant too much.

“Make me,” he smirked and you pounced on him. You started rolling around on the floor, scrapping as you hit him and he tried to dodge you. You didn't even hear the door open with Atti’s manic laughing and you yelling at him that he was an asshole.

“Seriously, guys? I can’t even leave you two for an hour?” you heard Kos sigh but neither of you stopped.

“She started it!” Atti yelled and you bit his hand, clamping down on it as he started screaming through his laughter.

“Are they always like this?” the other amused voice made you both still, Atti’s hand still in your mouth as you both turned comically to see the King standing next to an amused and exasperated Kos.

“Yep,” he snorted. You let Atticus’ hand go and it fell to the floor with a thud.

“Your Majesty,” Atti grinned sheepishly and you both stood up. You felt your face heating up as you dusted your pants off.

“We just got the uniforms, they’re nice. I couldn't help but notice that Y/N is the only one with gold on it though,” Atticus mused, shooting you a sly smirk as your eyes narrowed to slits at him. The King chuckled, eyes darting from Atti to you and then back to Atti.

“Maybe I just like her more,” he teased, making Atticus’ eyes widen as he turned to you. You could already sense what he was about to say, sense the shit eating grin about to grace his face and your legs kicked out without a thought. You swiped his legs right out from under him and he hit the floor like a sack of potatoes with a yelp. Kos hung his head but you could see the laugh fighting to break free and the King looked at you with wide shocked eyes for a moment.

“Thank you for the uniforms, Your Majesty. I’m going to get changed into mine,” you rushed out, giving him a quick smile before grabbing your sack and hurrying to the stairs. You made sure to shoot a scathing look to Atti who was still sprawled on the floor.

‘Say anything and I’ll stab you in your sleep,’ you mindlinked him.

‘You wouldn’t,’ he replied and you gave him a quick glance at the bottom of the stairs, raising a brow at him and he blanched. With that, you were off, taking the stairs two at a time.

You put on your uniform as you thought of the King’s words. You doubted he meant it, he sounded like he was teasing Atti, not that you blamed him, but it didn’t negate the fact you were the only one with gold. You reminded yourself you were thinking far too much into it. You had bonded with him after all. The only one out of all of your pack to have spent any real meaningful time with him. He’d opened up to you and you'd opened up to him. Maybe he did like you better, as a friend. You liked your uniform and you liked having a jacket for once, it meant you didn’t need to use your furs unless it was really cold, although you wondered what the rules were about the uniform. You did enjoy your furs sometimes, they were cozy. Everyone had their uniforms here but you’d seen a lot of people without their jackets on so maybe it wasn't such a big deal, you had no idea. When you were done, you made your way back downstairs knowing the King had left already. You couldn't hear or smell him anymore. When you got to the living area again, both Atti and Kos were in their uniforms too now and you mused that they’d changed in here as they hadn’t come up.

“Look at us, all fancy in our Royal garb. The King’s men, who would have thought it, huh?” Atti murmured, a wry grin on his lips as he stood a little taller. You snorted with a roll of your eyes.

“Tell me about it. It’s not where I thought we’d end up,” you replied, plonking down on the sofa next to Kos.

“This will be good for us. All of us. Thing’s can be better here, the pack won’t be lacking anything,” Kos murmured thoughtfully and you nodded in agreement. It felt like you’d always been taking job after job just to secure food or weapons for your pack, to keep you all well fed and protected. It had been exhausting if you were honest, even if it had been worth it. It would be different here. No worries about food and you were safe behind high walls. The target your pack forever had on its back because of your reputation had been lessened now and you had back up. A lot of it and from the finest warriors in the land. Even the impending war looming on the horizon would be worth it if it meant your pack would be kept safe and out of harm's way.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Into My Web

Bonus chapter!

Dark!Vampire!Billy Russo x Female Reader

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Ratings: Explicit 18+ ONLY

Warnings: Although this chapter might not include it, this fic will include; Sexual situations, swearing, human slave, biting, blood, murder, obsessive thoughts, dub con, Stockholm syndrome, gaslighting.

A/N: A bonus epilogue-like chapter for you all to soothe your wounds from the last chapter...😘❤️

Billy had felt true grief only once in his life, when Maria and the kids were gunned down. He knew there was a chance he'd feel it again sometime since he was pretty attached to his mismatched family. Attachments made you weak after all, and he knew if Frank or any of the others died, it would destroy him. The fact they were all vampires though made it less likely to happen so he didn't find himself worrying about it too much. He never thought he'd feel grief over a human, a pet no less. He never thought he'd feel grief over you. Yet here he was, slightly drunk, miserable and drowning in grief.

At the time, he felt like it had been the only solution. He couldn't have you the way he wanted, couldn't keep things as they were and he couldn't let you go. What other option did he have? There was also the issue of Frank's words getting under his skin, at realising that you didn't deserve the life he'd inflicted on you yet he knew he couldn't change it. At the time he felt like he was doing you a favor, putting you out of your misery. He couldn't even blame it on the booze he'd consumed before because he knew he'd have probably come up with the same plan even sober, yet if he was honest he wasn't sure he would have been able to go through with it without the alcohol dulling his senses. Even with it, the whole ordeal had been painful and he kept hearing your voice, your last words, on repeat as you begged him to stop. But he'd let the beast take over him completely, there was no stopping. He never shied away from the fact he was a monster and he usually relished in it. But right now he felt more of a monster than he ever had and he didn't like it.

Two days had passed since he'd murdered you and he felt like he was adrift at sea with no life raft in sight. He'd buried you in the garden but he'd not put you with all the others that he didn't know the name of. He made sure you had your own place. He'd dressed you in a pretty white sundress, one of his favorites on you, before laying you to rest next to a large rose bush. He'd reached out to someone he knew and pulled some strings to get a coffin sent right to his place, extra money to not ask questions. He'd gotten you a pretty one, spending far more than he needed to for someone that wasn't even around anymore. But he wasn't just going to throw you into a hole in the ground. After that he'd done nothing but lay on the sofa and be miserable. The only time he'd moved was to go to the vampire bar and throw money at the owner until he was able to take home some of the alcohol that could actually get him drunk.

He hadn't been able to go into the bedroom since it happened, his mind tormenting him. If it wasn't replaying your death it was replaying times you'd both spent together actually happy and it ate away at his sanity. The whole house still smelt like you but the bedroom was worse and he knew he couldn't handle it. He was even considering moving. There wasn't a damn thing in the place that didn't remind him of you in some way.

He hadn't been to work, hadn't spoken to any of his family. Hadn't done anything but miss you so much it made him sick. He hated every second of it. He hated that he felt this way at all. He'd considered killing you plenty of times in the time you'd spent with him, even thought of how he'd do it too. Sometimes he'd get the urge to snap your pretty little neck for the smallest of things because he'd get sick of going round and around in circles with you. But somewhere along the way it had changed and he hadn't noticed until it was too late. He'd gotten attached to his little human and then he'd done the unthinkable. He'd killed you and now you were gone. Even though he didn't exactly have any other solution on hand to the issue of the feelings he'd developed or how yours weren't even real, he couldn't help but wish he could turn back time and still have you here with him. Remorse wasn't something he was used to. Would it have been so bad for him to just pretend your feelings for him were real? To pretend he could be good for you?

He was lying on the sofa, not as drunk as he'd like due to his metabolism but still quite drunk as he glared at the ceiling with unseeing eyes. The TV was on loud to drown out the torturous silence that permeated the place since you'd gone. He'd never minded silence before but now he couldn't stand it. It was unbearable. He was well aware the hunters could come bursting in at any moment and he'd be a prime target in his state but he couldn't bring himself to care. His head was swimming thanks to the booze and also his messy brain and he didn't know which way was up. He couldn't believe how in the span of just a few days, everything could go so wrong.

Maybe this was karma coming back to bite him in the ass. Life giving him something beautiful and precious and letting him destroy it like everything else he touched. Not letting him see what he had until it was gone. Not giving him any other fucking option to his problem. Maybe this was payback for all the atrocities he'd committed in his life, his penance for his sins. Maybe he deserved this gut wrenching suffering and maybe, just maybe, Frank was right all along.

***

White hot pain was the first thing you felt, like your blood was acid running through your veins burning everything inside of your weakened frame. You woke up with a loud gasp, heaving air in your lungs, your eyes wide open in the darkness. You looked around but couldn’t figure out where you were. Your hands flew upwards and hit hard wood, you moved your arms and legs around furiously trying to find the way out.

“No, no, no, no,” you said over and over again realising you were stuck inside the smallest of boxes. Pure panic took over you and you punched and kicked through the wood surprisingly easily as dirt filled in. You kicked and clawed your way up and out into the open.

You crawled out of the ground, shaking and confused. A needle sharp pain in your skull made you hiss and cradle your head with both hands. You shut your eyes tightly. Your senses were overloaded with information and hit you all at once. Everything was heightened to an unbearable degree and you couldn’t filter out any of it. Between the pain and the chaos inside you, there was an astonishing realisation. You could see, hear, taste, smell, and feel everything. Like there were now things you could understand and experience that your human mind would not have been able to.

You whimpered, sitting down and tugged hard at your dirt covered hair trying to make it all stop.

“Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop,” you mumbled over and over again rocking back and forth on the ground. You looked around you, you remembered this place, it was in the backyard, Billy’s backyard. You turned around, the realisation slowly sinking in, as you looked back to the spot where you crawled up from.

Your own grave.

You heard him then, Billy. Your head snapped to the house, memories quickly coming back to you. You hissed, pure anger like you've never felt ripped through you and made you gasp. It was gone as fast as it came, your own head confusing you, everything heightened, even your own emotions.

You got up so fast you stumbled forward, like you were trying to walk through somebody else's body. You marched forward feeling on edge, like you'd snap at any moment. You opened the backdoor with so much force you almost tore it from its hinges. You walked to the living room where you were sure he'd be.

Billy jumped up on unsteady feet from the sofa when he heard the door fly open, looking around for the threat. He didn't expect to see you come into the room. He blinked dumbly for a moment as he took in the state of you. Your white dress now covered in mud as well as the rest of your body. But something was far more distinct than any of that. The lack of heartbeat. You weren't alive, you were very much dead. He shook his head and closed his eyes as if to clear the vision from his mind. It had been creative in torturing him with thoughts about you but this one was new. Yet when he opened his eyes again you were still there and his brain started to hurt not understanding what was happening. Was he finally going insane?

The moment you laid your eyes on him you pounced. In the blink of an eye you were on him flying to the floor with him under you.

“You! YOU! Y-Y-You put me in a box! You put me in a b-box!” you screamed in his face so loud it hurt your own ears. Your hands flew to cover them up with a whimper. You broke down in sobs, sadness turning into raw despair, replacing the pure anger you felt seconds ago.

Billy looked up from where he was laying under you, watching you with wide eyes. You felt very much real and he suddenly sobered right up with the realisation that he wasn't hallucinating. You were here and you were turned. He wracked his brain to try and figure out just how the fuck it had happened, replaying that God awful night in his head at rapid speed. He somewhat remembered you biting him, you must have drawn blood. He'd turned you. The guilt he felt at killing you increased to overwhelming proportions. He'd not only killed you but then he'd put you in a box and made you dig yourself out of your own grave, and he knew you were claustrophobic. The pain that ripped through his chest was unimaginable. He never wanted this for you.

"You killed me! Why?! Why did you do it?! Why did you hurt me?!," you asked him with a voice filled with heartbreak and rejection. Your dirt covered hands closing into small fists to hit him as you wailed.

Billy's throat constricted and his nostrils flared as he felt his eyes sting. Despite everything he'd been feeling, he'd not shed a tear. But now seeing you here suffering like this, seeing you so betrayed and hurt by what he'd done, he could feel the tears fighting to escape. He didn't fight you as you hit him, too shocked by what was happening.

"I… I'm sorry," he lamented, not able to offer you anything else in that moment. He didn't know what to say. He didn't have a good enough reason for what he'd done, even if it had felt right at the time. He reached out his shaky hands, cupping your cheeks as he felt his heart shatter. You were finally back here with him but at what cost? There was no telling how different you'd be now. Your skin was cold yet still as soft as he knew it to be and his lower lip quivered a little as some relief washed over him at you being here with him. The more selfish part of him not able to hide that he was happy you were back. He never thought he'd see, hear or touch you again.

You stopped and buried your face in his chest. His scent was now even stronger, sweeter than before. It filled your heart with mixed feelings, but you couldn't deny the love you still felt for him. He didn't waste a moment to wrap his arms around you as he breathed you in deeply. Your scent was a little different now but not too much. He enjoyed the feel of you in his arms again and he buried his face in your hair as he held you tightly, scared if he let go he'd find out none of this was real.

“Why am I not breathing? What’s happening? I woke up buried alive, am I dead?” you asked sniffling back your tears.

“And why is everything so bright?!” you complained, shielding your eyes from the lights. You got back up on your feet moving erratically, in jerky movement and mumbling nonsense looking everywhere around you.

Billy stood quickly, moving to turn the lights off. Vampires could see in the dark so you both didn't need them anyway. He didn't know how to tell you what had happened. That he'd turned you and he hadn't even meant to do it. How you were still supposed to be laying in your coffin and resting peacefully.

“I. Am. So. Hungry!” You snarled, looking around for food. You whimpered at the piercing pain in your gums at the mention of it. You brought your shaky hands to your mouth and touched what was now definitely fangs instead of the usual human canines. You whimpered, looking up at Billy, your eyes filled with vulnerability, pleading for help, for answers.

His heart was breaking all over again at seeing you this way. He remembered how scary it was to be turned and he hated that you were going through it. He walked over, cradling your face in his hands as his mind was still reeling that you were really here.

"You're a vampire, kitten," he murmured, not able to hide the sadness in his voice.

You looked up at him, stunned for a moment before breaking into a fit of giggles. The sound of it was eerie in the darkness yet you couldn't stop giggling. Of course you were a vampire now, it wasn't like life was gonna cut you a break in the afterlife. You paced around, small giggles filling the silence here and there as his words sank in. What would happen now? Would he still keep you around? How would you cope with the change on your own? And there were hunters out there now looking for vampires.

You felt all the remaining life and strength leave your body and you dropped to your knees on the floor. There wasn't any giggling now. You truly were destined to suffer and now you had nothing but the cold, dark, wasteland of eternity in front of you.

Billy looked at you, his whole body tense as his dark eyes couldn't move from you. He really wasn't sure how to fix this and he was starting to worry all of his mind games were about to come back to haunt him. He moved over to you, crouching in front of you as he tucked some of your hair behind your ear.

"Get on the bed and rest. I'll get you some… food," he muttered quietly. He hated how lost you seemed and he knew it was all his fault. He'd wanted to put you out of your misery and now he'd trapped you in it forever.

"B-but I'm covered in mud," you said weakly, thinking just how far away the bedroom was. Yet you staggered to your feet holding on to him.

He heaved a heavy sigh before scooping you into his arms.

"I got you, sweetheart. You don't gotta worry about nothin', I'll take care of you," he said softly as he carried you upstairs. He just wanted you to feel better. Wanted the pain in his chest to go away. He knew the blood would help but he couldn't help but wonder just how you'd react. Not just to your first time feeding but after too. He didn't like the uncertainty of the whole thing, not knowing just how you were going to be now you were turned.

You nodded and whispered thankful words to him, closing your eyes.

"So tired," you said, wishing you could sleep forevermore, ironically.

He walked to the bedroom, holding you with one arm as the other hand pulled the covers back on the bed. He didn't care about the mud. The sheets could always be changed. He lay you down before he pulled the blanket over you and perched on the bed next to you. His hand stroked your hair as he looked down at you, still feeling shocked you were here.

"I gotta go out and get you somethin' to eat. You gotta promise to stay here and rest, alright?" He asked softly. The last thing he needed was a baby vampire going out and feeding. First feeds were intense and you'd end up exposing yourself. But he knew you were weak and tired so he hoped you'd just stay in bed

"Will you come back to me?" You asked, anxious he was just gonna go away, get rid of you for a second time.

"I'll always come back to you, kitten," he murmured, voice wavering a little before he leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead. He loathed himself for what he'd done to you. You gave him a weak smile and nodded, making yourself comfortable in his bed, letting his smell wash your worries away.

He gave you one last look before he stood and left the room. He was wearing sweats and a t-shirt, his hair all over. He hadn't been looking after himself. He slipped on a hoodie and some sneakers before he quickly left, locking the door behind him. When he got to his car, he sat there gripping the steering wheel as he blew out an unnecessary breath. He's spent the last two days wishing he could take it all back. Wishing he could have you back with him. Now he had and he wasn't sure what to think. It was the typical case of be careful what you wish for. You were back but you weren't… you. Not fully. You were different and he wasn't sure just how different you'd be. He didn't like the uncertainty of the whole thing. He felt like this was more of that karma bullshit. Just more suffering on top of everything. Now he had to watch you going through all of this with no idea just how fucked your head would be. He tried to push all of his thoughts away, tried to focus on the fact you were back. He started the car as he pulled out, his goal to go and find someone for you to drain.

When Billy got to the bar, he was well aware he wasn't his usual pristinely dressed self. He hadn't exactly had time to change and make sure he looked presentable. But despite the fact he looked like he'd been living in the gym for a couple of days, he knew he would still be the best looking guy in the place. He walked in with his head held high, making a beeline to the bar. He ordered a drink and when it came, he sipped it leisurely as his dark eyes scanned the place for his target. The place wasn't exactly classy but it was full to the brim. He'd thought quite a bit on his way over to distract his mind that was going a mile a minute. He'd thought about what kind of victim he'd pick for you. Guys were out of the question or course. Not only did he just really dislike the idea but girls were much easier to subdue. Easier to lure and reel in.

There was a blonde woman at a table by herself. Big breasts and tiny everywhere else. A typical little Barbie. He'd fucked plenty of girls like that in the past though he'd admit they were never really his favorite. Then you came along and nobody was good enough. He didn't think you'd be fond of that one so his eyes looked elsewhere. Each one ended up a firm no and he was getting frustrated as he drank his drink, but then his eyes met a pretty redhead's across the bar. Her clothes left little to the imagination and Billy could see quite clearly just why she was in a place like this. She clearly had a goal in mind herself. She was attractive, although nothing compared to you, but she was the only one who'd piqued his interest. And yeah maybe the red hair was what sold him since he'd always had a thing for redheads. If he had to watch you feed then he could at least make it entertaining.

He had mixed feelings about the whole you being a vampire thing. He hated that he'd done this to you when the whole point of killing you was so you'd finally find peace after suffering your whole life. But the beast inside of him was strangely pleased at the revelation. Not only because it meant you were back but also because he couldn't wait to meet your own little monster. The rational side of him was worried about it. A lot of people when turned would end up with their worst traits enhanced and he was worried about your mental state after all the trauma you'd been through. The more primal side of him couldn't wait to watch you bare your fangs and feed and he knew his body would have a certain reaction to seeing it. He felt all mixed up, more divided by his nature than he'd ever felt before. He'd always felt one with the beast since he'd turned but now he felt like Billy and the monster were two different people.

He pushed all of the thoughts out of his head. He was here for a reason. He gave the redhead a sly smirk before he turned back to face forward as he sipped his drink. Just as he knew she would, she came over and sat next to him.

"Hi, my name's Louisa," she purred, fluttering her lashes flirtatiously. Billy glanced at her, flashing her his best charming smile as he finished the rest of his drink off in one go. It was regular whisky so it wasn't like it did anything.

"Billy," he supplied, his dark eyes purposely sweeping over her body. He wasn't disappointed and it had the desired effect when she smirked widely and leaned closer to him.

"Nice to meet you Billy," she said softly.

He licked his lower lip before twisting in his seat to face her better.

"I'll be honest… I've had a real shitty day. Usually I'd turn on the charm and buy you a coupla drinks, but right now all I wanna do is take you home and show you a good time," he murmured smoothly, lips tugging into a smirk. She looked taken aback by his boldness for a moment before she giggled, biting down on her lower lip.

"Sounds like a plan to me," she grinned, wiggling her brows at him. His smirk widened but only because of how easy it was. He needed to get back home to you. The idea of you laying in bed hungry and sad didn't sit well with him.

Before long he was pulling into the driveway of his house. Louisa had been pretty handsy on the way back here but he'd successfully avoided her advances with the excuse of wanting to get somewhere private and comfortable. He unlocked the door and let her go through first before he walked in and locked the door. He grabbed her wrist and tugged her to him, leaning in like he might kiss her.

"Don't fight back and don't scream. You're not scared and you wanna be here," he muttered lowly, using his compulsion on her. It would be messy enough as it was since it was your first feed and the last thing he needed was her causing a scene. He took her hand and led her up the stairs to the bedroom.

You opened your eyes the moment you heard the door close. You could hear the steady heartbeat, pumping rhythmically but the sound wasn’t what woke you, the smell was. It had you sit up in bed moaning, the mouthwatering smell getting stronger and stronger, following Billy to the bedroom. The door opened, your eyes flickered to Billy then to her. She reminded you of the first girl he brought home to make you jealous, a low primal growl escaped your lips, fangs descending with a hiss as you glared back at her. You glared so intensely from the bed it was a miracle she didn’t burst into flame.

Billy watched you for a moment with rapt attention, taking in your reaction. If he wasn't a big bad vampire himself then he might have been intimidated by the look on your face. It was a good job he'd compelled the girl or she'd be making a run for it.

"What do you think, kitten?" He asked softly, wondering how you felt about his choice. If he was honest, he didn't really need to be so fussy. Anyone would have done, blood was blood. But he'd tried to put some thought into who he brought back for you.

You stayed perched on the edge of the bed like a wild cat studying her prey, your head tilting this way and that way, not hearing Billy. The only thing your brain was processing was her, more specifically, her blood, every cell of your being zeroing on her.

Billy's eyes darted from you to the girl and then back again. The girl was looking around curiously, completely relaxed and not sensing the very real danger literally right in front of her. He didn't say a word, just waiting for the other shoe to drop as he watched you. Waiting for you to pounce.

You were standing in front of her in the blink of an eye, your small hand grabbing her by the throat at a painful angle like she was a ragdoll. You tilted your head to one side, your unblinking empty eyes on her, the beast in you making small chirping like noises.

Something washed over Billy and he wasn't quite sure what. But he watched you with slightly parted lips and dark eyes, taking in everything about this new version of you. It was strange. You'd gone from acting like a scared little girl to a predator and he didn't think he'd ever be able to get used to that.

You pounced, sinking your fangs deep and hard in her neck. You gripped her so tightly you felt her shoulder bones snap with a loud wet noise. The moment her sweet blood touched your tongue, you fell into a bottomless frenzy. You dropped to your knees, taking her down with you as you gnawed at her neck for more blood. Her precious heart pumped all the blood into your mouth without you even having to suck, making you purr and moan in ecstasy. You looked up at Billy with your crimson eyes adorned with dark protruding veins.

He felt his own eyes change as yours met his. A small part of himself was devastated to see you this way. That he'd done this to you. But most of him was overtaken by the primal tugging he felt pulling at him for you. His beast reaching out to yours. Seeing you vamp out like this and feeding had arousal flooding his system hard.

You pulled back to spit a piece of muscles to the floor and went back to suck the last drops her feeble heart could give you. Her neck finally snapped at the rough handling, the final straw making her poor heart stop completely. You hissed, shaking her body like an empty bottle of ketchup, biting her wrists to get every last drop of it. You wanted more, you needed more, more, more...

You tossed her to the side, a new faint smell reaching you after feeding for the first time, completing the process. In what felt like two steps, you were kneeling head first in the kitchen fridge, ripping apart one of the blood bags Billy kept in case of emergencies.

Billy looked at the door where you'd vanished from and growled. He'd tried to grab you but even with his fast reflexes, you were faster and he hadn't been able to stop you. Baby vampires were a bitch to deal with. He used his vamp speed to follow you down to the kitchen, knowing full well your hunger wasn't sated yet. He remembered that feeling well. It would ease over time and the blood lust was easier to control after a while. But you were newly turned so he'd have to deal with that for a little bit.

You spit back the first sip, choking on the disgusting stale taste of it yet going back to gnaw at the bag. You emptied two more before finally feeling satiated. You finally stood up, heaving a long sigh, feeling your body mend itself with the blood. Your thoughts were now clearer, your body felt strong yet agile, fast. It felt like electricity in your veins. You turned to Billy, looking even more handsome and flawless with your vampire sight, licking your lips.

You looked like you felt better and Billy's body relaxed a little, despite the arousal still coursing through his veins. The small part of him that was conflicted over the whole thing seemed to get quieter and quieter the more he felt his need for you grow. The more his animalistic side to him took over. You had blood all over your chin, dripping from your mouth, dirt all over you. Yet to the monster in him, you'd never looked more perfect.

“Shower?” You suggested, licking the blood off your fingers, giving him an innocent-like look as if you didn’t just crush and drink a human dry and three bags of blood. He blinked dumbly at you for a moment, eyes red and intense as he watched you licking the blood from your fingers.

…What has he done

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Pretty Woman Masterlist

Pretty Woman

Billy Russo x Female Reader

Rating: Explicit 18+

Warnings: Mentions of prostitution, allusion to drugs, alcohol consumption, eventual smut

Disclaimer: I do not own the title nor the plot idea. All credit to Touchstone Pictures, Silver Screen Partners IV bla bla bla…Just revamping this classic movie into a fanfiction for my own entertainment purpose.

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - ...WIP...

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo fanfic #billy russo x female reader #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n #ben barnes

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Into My Web Masterlist

Into my Web

Dark!Vampire!Billy Russo x Female Reader

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Ratings: Explicit 18+ ONLY

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2- Chapter 3 - Chapter 4- Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10 - Chapter 11 - Chapter 12 - Chapter 13 - Chapter 14 - Chapter 15 - Chapter 16 - Chapter 17 - Chapter 18 - Chapter 19 - Chapter 20 - Chapter 21 - Chapter 22 - Bonus Chapter

#billy russo #billy russo x reader #vampire!billy #billy russo fanfic #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo fanfics #billy russo smut #billy russo x you #billy russo x female reader #billy russo x y/n

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Red, White n’ Blue Masterlist

Red, White n’ Blue

Billy Russo x FemaleOC

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Intro - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 -Part 10 - Part 11 - Part 12 - Part 13 - Part 14 - Part 15 - Part 16 - Part 17 - Part 18 - Part 19 - Part 20 - Part 21 - Part 22 - Part 23 - Part 24 - Part 25 - Part 26 - Part 27 - Part 28 - Part 29 - Part 30 - Part 31 - Part 32 - Part 33 - Part 34 - Part 35 - Part 36 - Part 37 - Epilogue

#billy russo #billy russo x oc #billy russo fanfic #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo masterlist #ben barnes

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

We sure as fuck do baby 😘😈

Hum...

... Should we give them the next chapter as a bonus epilogue content? @the-cult-of-russo ? 😈

Into My Web

Chapter 22

Dark!Vampire!Billy Russo x Female Reader

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Ratings: Explicit 18+ ONLY

A/N: Final chapter! We hope you've enjoyed this story as much as we did writing it! 😘❤️

The house was silent as you made your way back upstairs to the bedroom. The only sounds to comfort you were the wooden floor creaking under your bare feet and your sniffles. You went after him when he had left, when he ran away from you for the second time since he took you home months ago. Only this time it wasn't to save you from him, it was to save himself from you.

Your heart had dropped when you didn't find him anywhere, when you saw the empty driveway outside. You had cleaned up downstairs for him, leaving no trace of the evening ever happening, hoping it’d please him when he’d come back home, if he ever was coming back. The thought of him abandoning you was raw and excruciating.

You picked up the dress on the floor, your chest squeezing painfully at the fresh memory of you two dancing downstairs earlier, how wonderful it had felt, being in his arms that way. You put it away in the closet inside its fancy garment bag. You went through your bedtime routine on autopilot and hesitated, looking at the empty bed where he had left you. You could still see him looking back at you in horror, how you made him flee from his own bed, how you had been the one to fuck everthing up.

The pain was so deep, it made it hard to breathe. Anything would be better than this, this feeling, this hole inside you. You picked your pillow off the bed and walked to the closet without thinking, shutting the door behind you, locking yourself into it on purpose. You felt the usual panic kick in, the walls closing in on you from all sides. But you focused on it this time, wanting to feel anything else than your painful heartbreak. You put the pillow on the floor, picking one of his jackets in the dark to cover your shaking body now in a tight ball on the wooden floor.

You deserved this, the panic, the pain. He’d be pleased to find you here, punished without having to lift a finger. You broke down, unable to hold the panic at bay anymore. Your chest was racking with loud sobs and hyperventilated until your vision blurred, until you finally passed out and darkness took over.

By the time Billy got home, his head was still a jumbled mess. He'd come up with a solution to the problem but it didn't soothe him at all. When he stepped inside, he listened out for your heartbeat, feeling his body relax somewhat when he heard it. It was steady, you were asleep. He trudged up the stairs, his feet feeling heavy as he followed the sound of your heart. He wondered just how you reacted when he left. He couldn't imagine you'd been happy about it. When he got to his room, he frowned when he didn't see you in the bed like he expected. No, you weren't in bed. Because your heartbeat led him to the closet. He blinked at it, confused why you'd be asleep in there. You hated the closet, he'd used it as a torture chamber for you for months. He didn't understand why you'd voluntarily be in there.

He opened the door slowly, his frown deepening when he saw you curled up asleep on the floor. He could smell the salt still lingering on your cheeks from your tears. Apparently he'd made you cry by leaving the way he did. An odd and uncomfortable feeling hit his chest and it felt a lot like guilt. He loathed it. He crouched down in front of you, shaking your shoulder a little.

"Get up," he muttered, anger still boiling away inside of him from the god awful night he'd had. And now he was annoyed that you'd put yourself in the closet and he felt bad about it. He wasn't the one that put you in here yet he felt guilty anyway. And this was exactly why this wouldn't work anymore. Now he knew he felt something, it changed everything. He felt vile things like guilt over stupid shit and he didn't like it one bit. There was no way the situation could carry on as it had been. It was all ruined.

You looked up at his dark silhouette towering over you, the bedroom light behind him obscuring his features. You got up to your feet as he ordered you but you were unable to meet his eyes. He seemed furious at you still, agitated and it made you skittish. You wanted to say something to him but you couldn’t find your voice so you stayed silent, looking down and waited.

He blew out a sigh at how you were acting, his head a swirl of too many things to pinpoint. The alcohol also wasn't helping. He put his fingers under your chin and tilted your face up to his. He looked at you for a moment, hating how the uncomfortable feeling in his chest got worse.

"Why are you in the closet?" He asked softly, dark eyes boring into you.

You opened your mouth a few times, not sure how to answer him or what to tell him.

“I...I upset you. I made you leave your own bed and ruined the evening you had planned for us,” you said, swallowing thickly when you heard your voice wavering.

“I couldn’t bear the thought of failing you, of upsetting you. So, I punished myself, knowing very well that was all I deserved for it,” you added, your fingers playing with the hem of his shirt nervously.

The uncomfortable feeling turned into something more painful and he frowned before wrapping his arms around you. One of his large hands cradled the back of your head to his chest as he breathed in your scent and let it wash over him.

"It's fine. Let's just… forget about it, alright?" He asked with a sigh. He was done talking about it, all it did was remind him of the shitty situation he'd been put in.

“Okay,” you whispered, feeling better at being in his arms again. Yet there was an odd feeling at the nape of your neck, something instinctual nagging at you. You ignored it and pressed yourself closer to his body, focusing on him instead.

He moved away, cupping your cheeks as his eyes scanned your face, memorising every inch of it. You really were the most beautiful person he'd ever laid his eyes on. He tried to ignore the dull ache in his chest as he pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, lips lingering for a moment.

"C'mon," he said quietly, leading you out of the closet. He let your hand go once in the room and toed off his shoes as he started to undress. He felt exhausted. Confused, conflicted and that goddamn guilt was still eating at him. Like heavy chains wrapped tightly around him as they squeezed the life out of him.

You picked your pillow and moved into the bed, already naked since you didn't bother with clothes earlier. You looked at him as he undressed, your heart squeezing tightly at how handsome and perfect he was. You laid down on your side of the bed facing him and gave him a weak smile.

Once he was stripped down, he moved to climb into bed. He lay on his side facing you, tucking some of your hair behind your ear and letting his fingers trail down the side of your face.

"You're my favorite person, you know that?" He asked softly, allowing himself to be soft in the moment. It was confusing, being this angry yet feeling so gentle at the same time. He couldn't help it now he was here with you. He allowed himself to have a moment of raw honesty because it wasn't like it mattered now anyway.

You felt your heart stop and skip a beat, it made you gasp. His words washed over you, making you smile a little wider. You didn’t trust your voice so you nodded, scooting closer to him, needing to be in his arms, safe.

He moved your face to his as he kissed you, soft at first before he deepened it. He savored the taste of your lips against his. Kissing you was something he really enjoyed, he could do it for hours. He'd question why his chest was burning so fiercely but he knew why. He was trying desperately to ignore it but it felt like his unbeating heart was being ripped right out of his chest.

Your body moved with the kiss, one hand buried in his hair as you kissed him back with all the love you had for him. You broke the kiss, gasping for air at the intensity of it. You looked up into his dark eyes, tried to read his thoughts for a second before kissing him again languidly. You slid on top of him, your legs straddling him, your lips never leaving his.

He groaned at feeling the weight of your body on his and his hands grasped your hips tightly. He kissed you hungrily as his fingers bit into your hips, arching up at you greedily. His more primal instincts were kicking in and his body was responding to you eagerly.

You reached down between your legs to fist him, rubbing the head of his cock on your folds and making him moan softly. His moan was music to your ears, knowing you were the one causing them. You needed him and wanted him now, no teasing, just him. You moved his dick to your entrance and slid onto him, drinking in his dirty groan.

He loved how you felt all tight and wet around him like this. His hands wandered your body as he arched up into you, letting the pleasure make his mind go blissfully blank. It was relieving for the quiet after all the noise.

You rode him deep and slow, enjoying how he felt inside you and hit all the right spots. You leaned down, resting your head on his forehead, running your hand in his hair. It hurt, your heart was painfully reminding you of the earlier rejection but you ignored it. You had him now, that was all you wanted to focus on.

It felt way more intense than usual and he moaned against your lips as he soaked in how good it felt with you fucking yourself on his cock. One of his hands moved to the back of your neck, his body moving against yours.

"You're so perfect," he murmured with a moan, the pleasure making his head fuzzier than the alcohol did.

You gasped, riding him harder to make up for the painful stabbing at your chest, you turned your head, closing your eyes tightly. You weren’t gonna cry, he was here, he came back for you. Your lips crashed down to his, desire taking over your brain and body.

“Yours,” you said quickly between kisses and pants.

Your words hit him hard and he almost came right away. He growled, wrapping his arms around you before rolling you both over. He pushed deeper inside of you with a dirty moan, his body over yours as he kissed you desperately. The pleasure was getting higher and higher and he was aware his eyes had changed. He was firmly keeping his fangs away though as he kissed you. The beast inside of him was clawing to get out and he knew he wouldn't be able to hold it off for too long, but he wanted to savor you first.

“Oh, Billy,” you moaned, feeling your climax build up fast at the new position. You couldn’t stop kissing him, your hands running all over his chest, his neck, his perfect face. You let a small whimper, feeling just on the edge of your orgasm, ready to fall apart any moment now.

He broke the kiss and trailed kisses down your cheek to your ear as he rut into you like an animal. He was struggling to hold back.

"Cum for me, kitten," he demanded roughly, his lips moving to your neck as he nipped and sucked on it. The sound of your fast heart beat and the feel of your pulse against his tongue had his mouth watering and his dick twitching inside of you.

You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, one hand tugging at his hair as the world fell down around you. You came hard and loud, holding on to him like a lifeline. A single tear ran down your temple to hide in your hair at the pleasure.

Feeling you tighten around him like that had him moaning and gasping and it was hard for him to stop himself coming with you. He kissed his way back up to your ear and even though the pleasure was intense, the burning in his chest suddenly got worse.

"You deserve better than me, Y/N," he muttered, not giving you a chance to respond as he let his fang descend and he sunk them into your neck. The first sip of your blood tasted like heaven and he moaned, his pleasure increasing tenfold as he came instantly and spilled himself inside of you.

Your entire body tensed up, feeling the stabbing and burning pain of his fangs ripping their way into your neck. You tried pushing him off you even though you knew he wouldn’t budge an inch. All rational thoughts went out the window as the instinctual primal urge to flee kicked in.

“Billy? Billy! Stop. Billy!” You panicked, trying to snap him out of it.

A feral growl tore from his throat at you fighting back. He snatched your wrists, fangs not leaving your neck, as he pinned them roughly above your head using his vampire strength. Soft Billy was gone now, the beast was out and in full control. Your blood was like nothing he'd ever tasted before and he couldn't get enough of it. He drank from you greedily, his high from you mixing with the high from your blood. It was euphoric.

“Billy! Please stop, please stop! Don’t kill me, please,” you sobbed kicking and clawing at him. You let out a terrified scream, everything started to spin in slow motion as he slowly killed you. You used the last of your strength to bite him out of it, your dull teeth sinking in his shoulder so hard you tasted blood. You fought for your life, begged him to stop until your body failed you. You fell back onto the mattress, into the arms of death, whispering his name one last time.

He didn't notice, the pain not even registering to him as he savored every drop of your blood. There was no guilt now, no feelings at all. His animalistic nature was at its peak and he was more beast than man. He could hear your heartbeat getting weaker and weaker as he continued to drain the life right out of you. The moment your heart stopped, something snapped in him as he moved away with a gasp. He didn't feel the euphoria anymore as he looked down at your pale and lifeless face. He blinked at you slowly, the burning in his chest feeling like someone stuffed a grenade into his chest, letting it go off. He tried to tell himself this was the only option but he couldn't stop the feeling of utter devastation that hit him like a train. He'd killed you. You were gone. He'd never be able to hear your sweet voice again, to hear your laugh or see how your face would light up with wonder as he showed you something you'd never seen before. He'd never be able to hold you in his arms or kiss your lips. You were just gone. Just another victim like all the others.

He growled, feeling his eyes prick with tears as he jumped off the bed, running a hand through his hair as he glared at your dead body. He hated you for driving him to do this. He hated the grief that settled over him like a sheet of ice and how the pain seemed to ricochet through his entire body. He'd never regret killing anyone and his body count was too high to even remember. Yet right now as he looked at you, all he felt was regret and he was drowning in it. But it was better this way. This was the only option.

#billy russo #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo imagine #billy russo x reader #billy russo x female reader #billy russo fanfics #ben barnes #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n #billy russo/reader

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

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Into My Web

Chapter 22

Dark!Vampire!Billy Russo x Female Reader

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Ratings: Explicit 18+ ONLY

A/N: Final chapter! We hope you've enjoyed this story as much as we did writing it! 😘❤️

"Why are you in the closet?" He asked softly, dark eyes boring into you.

You opened your mouth a few times, not sure how to answer him or what to tell him.

“I...I upset you. I made you leave your own bed and ruined the evening you had planned for us,” you said, swallowing thickly when you heard your voice wavering.

"It's fine. Let's just… forget about it, alright?" He asked with a sigh. He was done talking about it, all it did was remind him of the shitty situation he'd been put in.

Once he was stripped down, he moved to climb into bed. He lay on his side facing you, tucking some of your hair behind your ear and letting his fingers trail down the side of your face.

"You're so perfect," he murmured with a moan, the pleasure making his head fuzzier than the alcohol did.

“Yours,” you said quickly between kisses and pants.

He broke the kiss and trailed kisses down your cheek to your ear as he rut into you like an animal. He was struggling to hold back.

“Billy? Billy! Stop. Billy!” You panicked, trying to snap him out of it.

#vampire billy #billy russo #billy russo fanfiction #billy russo imagine #billy russo x reader #billy russo x female reader #billy russo fanfics #ben barnes #billy russo x you #billy russo x y/n #billy russo/reader

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

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Such a Softer Sin (Part 5)

Pairing: Billy Russo x Reader

Warnings: I’m not specifically tagging this one, if you’ve seen the show, nothing will shock you. Smut will happen eventually so minors DNI, thanks.

A/N: Some bonding with Billy, anyone?

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“Are you sure you don't want to come? King William, sorry, Billy, said it was okay if you came with us,” Atticus asked with a sly smirk and you shot him a dirty look, kicking him in the leg and making him almost fall over. He caught himself on the wall just in time as he laughed.

“I’m sure. It’s good to get everything set up for Leanna before she gets here and I’ll get to check the place out a little,” you huffed, still glaring at Atticus as he and Kosmos got ready to leave.

“We won’t be too long. We’ll need to get everything packed so we might be a day or so. We’ll try to be as quick as possible,” Kosmos said softly, giving you a concerned look. You’d never been on your own before, at least for a long while. But you were a grown ass woman and you’d deal with it.

“It’s fine. Just make sure everyone’s okay with the plan, try to break the news gently,” you sighed, raising a brow a little. Kosmos tried his best but he was still rough around the edges.

“I will, don’t worry,” he smiled ruefully and you smiled back before giving him a hug. Atticus stepped over then, opening his arms with a sheepish smile. You huffed but a grin tugged your lips and you wrapped your arms around him too.

“Behave yourself,” you muttered as you squeezed him before letting him go.

“I always behave,” he smirked and you snorted, shaking your head.

“I’ll believe that when pigs can fly,” you replied amused.

“Mhm, well you try not to break anything when we’re gone. There’s only so many of the King’s things you can break before they start to think you’re doing it on purpose,” Atticus grinned and you rolled your eyes.

“I’m starting to think Kos should just leave you behind when everyone else comes here,” you glowered playfully and he gasped, holding a hand over his heart.

“You’re ruthless, Y/N. You’d leave me defenseless like that? Who would keep me safe if I’m not with you?” he asked dramatically and Kosmos just shook his head as he made his way over to the door.

“As fun as whatever this is, we need to get going,” he said as he gave Atticus a look. Atticus threw you a cheeky smile before he waltzed over to the door.

“We’ll miss you,” he murmured, all traces of humor gone now as he looked over at you. You felt a pang in your chest and you swallowed thickly.

“I’ll miss you too, now go. You’ve got important business to take care of,” you said firmly, not wanting this to be a bigger deal than it was. He nodded before he opened the door and walked out, Kosmos lingering in the doorway.

“Try and not get into any trouble,” he warned with a teasing smirk and you scoffed.

“Who do you think I am? Atti?” you asked offended and he raised an amused brow that made you gape at him. With that, he was out the door and you were left alone.

You weren’t really sure what to do with yourself now. You knew Karen wanted to show you around the medical facilities and the place you’d all be staying but you had no idea where to find her. You didn’t really feel like looking for her either. The last time you went wandering, you ended up breaking the King’s vase and you didn’t want a repeat performance. Atticus was right, there were only so many times you could break his stuff. He’d been kind enough last time but at some point, he wouldn’t be so understanding. You flopped on the bed as you wondered what to do, your thoughts carrying away from you. Luckily you weren’t hungry. Azalea had stopped by earlier with a basket full of fruit and baked good for breakfast and you’d enjoyed it. You knew the full moon would be soon and you found excitement swelling inside of you. You loved letting your wolf free, loved the freedom you felt as you ran around outside. As a wolf, you could only transform under the full moon. You could force a shift in dire circumstances, if the wolf thought you were in danger and came out to protect you. It was dangerous though, there had been some cases where people had been stuck in their wolf form from forcing a shift. Lycans though, like the King, could shift at will. Their wolf was stronger, faster, bigger than all the others. More powerful. You wondered what he looked like. You’d seen from the glass window that he was a black wolf with glowing silver eyes but you wondered what it would be like in person, wondered how big he truly was. The rumor was that he didn’t shift anymore, not after last time. You’d heard the tales of when he shifted after the last war, when his Beta’s family got killed. He’d gone on a rampage and almost killed innocents. Your mind drifted to the dinner the night before, you’d kept feeling his eyes on you and it was slightly unsettling. You weren't sure if he didn’t trust you or something but he’d been nothing but nice to you. You'd even been shocked when he agreed with you over the Council and you’d admit to feeling smug at how uncomfortable they were to the point they left. Your thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock at your door and you sat up, looking at it warily. Heaving a sigh, you stood up and opened the door, revealing Karen who was smiling brightly at you.

“Good morning. I thought we could take that tour,” she grinned.

“Sounds good to me,” you replied, trying to muster up a smile for her. You felt incredibly awkward and out of place here and she seemed to be a ray of sunshine. It was a lot to deal with.

You followed her down the hall and then down the steps to outside in silence and it was making your skin crawl.

“So, you’re a witch,” you blurted, unable to help it. It was something you picked up at dinner the night before but you hadn’t dared to say anything, especially in front of the King. You hadn't even meant to bring it up now but your mouth had decided to go off without warning. Karen’s head whipped to you as an amused laugh slipped past her lips and you closed your eyes with a groan.

“I’m sorry, that came out wrong. I just meant that… King William’s Beta, Frank… he said you’re his mate. A wolf and witch pairing is a little…” you trailed off, not really knowing how to word it but she did it for you.

“Impossible? I know, but somehow it happened. I’m glad it did though, I can’t imagine my life without him,” she said with a wistful smile and you found your own lips tugging up a little as the pair of you walked past some buildings to the left of the castle.

“What about you? Do you have a mate?” she asked as she gave you a curious glance. You chuckled and shook your head.

“No… I don’t even know if I have one anymore. Chances are he was part of my old pack. And now they’re all…” you frowned as flashes burst through your mind in quick succession. Blood, screaming, you covered in mud hiding in the bushes as Atticus covered your mouth to stifle your sobs. Suddenly, you felt a calming sensation wash over you, almost like someone wrapped a soothing warm blanket around you. The haze over your eyes cleared and you blinked rapidly, eyes darting to your wrist where you saw Karen’s hand. When you looked at her startled, she took her hand back quickly, an apologetic look on her face.

“Sorry… It was just a simple calming spell, nothing more I promise. You looked a little… lost,” she said carefully, her eyes shining with concern. You looked away quickly as you cleared your throat, embarrassment burning inside of you. You didn’t like looking so vulnerable, especially in front of people you didn’t know.

“It’s fine. It’s a pretty cool trick honestly, I bet King William gets you to use it on him all the time. It must be stressful being King,” you mused softly, a wry smile on your face as you tried to deflect from your embarrassing behavior. Karen snorted, rolling her eyes playfully.

“Like he’d ever let me use magic on him,” she grinned fondly and you could tell by her tone she must be close to him. You’d gone past most of the buildings now, only one left to go and it looked pretty big.

“So, how are you finding it here?” she asked softly after a small moment of silence.

“It’s… nice,” you answered uncertainly and she smiled to herself.

“You don’t like it, do you?” she asked with a knowing smirk and you snorted, shrugging a little.

“I do, it’s just… a lot. It’s bigger than I’m used to and a lot more people than I’m used to,” you said honestly. You hadn't been here long enough to see if those feelings of uncomfortableness would ease up, to see if you settled in here.

“That’s understandable. I’m sure some time will help you,” she mused as you both came to a stop outside of a building.

“What do you think of the King?” she asked. Your eyes narrowed a little, a rueful smirk tugging at your lips as you tried to suss her out.

“I feel like that's a trick question. You're clearly friends with him and you're his Beta’s mate,” you murmured amused and she chuckled, tucking some of her hair behind her ear.

“I just mean, is he what you thought he’d be? I know you’ve had a little time with him on your own and most people are always surprised by how normal he is,” she shrugged. You nibbled your lower lip a little as you nodded. It seemed valid enough.

“He wasn’t what I thought, but I know more than most that there’s more to people than the stories people tell about them,” you said simply. It had been hard to wrap your head around, still was if you were honest, as he really hadn’t been what you thought he’d be. But you knew the same could be said about you so you tried not to really dwell on it. It was a pleasant surprise to find out he wasn't a stuffed up old guy who loved ordering people around. Karen nodded, looking pleased with your answer before she led you inside of the building.

You were shocked by how large it was. It was the size of a full blown human hospital and inside was clean and smelled of bleach. There were numerous doctors and nurses around as Karen led you through some corridors and up some stairs. Before long, you’d been taken to the maternity wing. She’d told you all of the sections of the facility as you passed them, how the doctors here knew what they were doing. For the most part, while they had a large amount of staff here, they mostly treated minor injuries from training or from whatever special jobs the Elite Warriors would go on. Of course, there would be an emergency or two here and there but it didn't happen too often. She led you through the birthing suites, all different kinds as she listed off things your brain didn't quite understand because you knew nothing about babies. But then just through the maternity ward, she led you to the NICU and she stopped outside of a large window. When you peeped inside, there was a small baby inside an incubator.

“He’s so tiny,” you murmured softly, blinking at the fragile little wolf.

“I know. He’s called Jason, his parents are warriors here. We don't get an abundance of babies here but with all the staff and warriors, a lot of them mates… it happens. He was born a little early but he’s a fighter. He’s doing really well,” she hummed, eyes glued to the baby. You nodded, hope filling your chest as you knew what this meant for you and your pack.

“Leanna will be in good hands here, Y/N. You don’t need to worry,” Karen said firmly and you looked at her. You were taken off guard that she’d remembered her name but it made you respect her a little more. She clearly cared and that meant a lot to you.

“Thank you,” you murmured with a nod and she smiled brightly at you.

“Okay then, I’ll take you to your new pack house,” she grinned before she turned around and you followed her back out of the building.

“All the housing is on the other side of the grounds,” she explained as you both started off. As you crossed over to the other side, you turned over to near the fences at the noise and saw the Warriors training. The training area was large and full of short grass instead of the dirt floor that covered most of the inside of the castle grounds. There were a bunch of tiered benches, some Warriors and some seemingly other wolves. You weren't sure who they were, you still had no idea how the uniform system worked. You’d gathered that the Warriors wore black and red. You noticed the King then too. He was wearing almost the same outfit as you saw last time, only this time his pants were black and he wasn’t wearing his jacket. You didn't even realize you’d stopped walking as you watched him weidling a large sword, sparring with one of his Warriors. You couldn't help but watch, mesmerized by how fast and graceful he was as he dodged and striked out with his sword. You knew he wasn't using his full speed or strength though, you knew he was capable of far more than this, but then the poor Warrior wouldn’t stand a chance against him. The Warrior was putting up a good fight but in the end, King William knocked the sword right out of his grasp and held the tip of his sword to his throat. There was a tense moment between them as they watched each other and you looked on with rapt interest. The Warrior held his hands up in surrender before he smiled and then the King smiled too. It was almost blinding with how radiant it was and you couldn't tear your eyes away. He lowered his sword, still smiling as he slapped the Warrior on the back and said something. You couldn't hear what but you presumed it was something akin to ‘good job’. It was still strange to see him like this, he looked so carefree and clearly, he’d enjoyed the fight. He didn't even look like a King right then, he just looked like a wolf who had enjoyed the thrill of the fight and was riding the high. As if sensing your eyes on him, he turned your way and his eyes locked with yours, making your breathing hitch as his smile slipped and he just looked at you. You knew you should look away, avert your eyes. He was the King, the Alpha of Alpha’s, you shouldn't just be staring right at him like this, yet you couldn't move your eyes from him. He didn’t seem annoyed though as his lips curled up again in a lopsided smile as he raised a hand and waved. You blinked dumbly before turning to Karen who was standing next to you looking thoroughly amused.

“He’s not waving at me,” she shrugged when you just looked at her quizzically.

“Oh…” you murmured, looking back over at him. He was still smiling at you and you lifted your hand, waving lamely and internally groaning at what an idiot you were making of yourself. You heard Karen snort from beside you and you felt heat sweep up your entire being. You watched as he looked at you for a moment longer before turning around and walking back over to his men. You felt puzzled by the interaction and were glad when Karen started walking again and you followed her.

“Is he like this with everyone?” you asked curiously. You were just confused by his behavior, he almost acted like you were already friends.

“Not really,” Karen muttered wryly and you looked at her, eyes narrowed a little. It made you think of Atticus’ words and you frowned to yourself, hoping he was wrong. You didn’t want the King getting the wrong impression, thinking you were about to hop into bed with him. Seeing you lost in your own thoughts, Karen spoke again.

“He likes you… your pack, I mean. He respects what you guys have done, building a pack from nothing after all you’ve been through. And he has a lot of respect for you specifically. He admires your fighting skills, or at least what he’s heard about them. You guys are different to the normal packs we get here,” she explained and you nodded to yourself. It made sense and it was similar to your own defense that you’d given to Atticus. It was a nice thought, to have the respect of the King himself. You both stopped in front of a large house that was bigger than your pack house back home. It also wasn't made out of wood or a little bit wonky like yours either. It was built out of bricks and looked well made, it even had a little wooden porch on the front. She led you up the few steps of the porch before inside and your eyes darted around as you took it all in. The lower floor looked like a giant living area. There was no kitchen in sight and you wondered if they had some kind of dining hall somewhere in the castle grounds. It was cozy with plush sofas and a large fur rug beside the fireplace. It even had working electricity, it blew your mind. You’d seen the electrics in the castle, seen them in the hospital, but you’d hardly expected to find it in the houses too. It was such a foreign concept to you. A lot of wolves opted for more primal living lifestyles and others, like your pack, couldn't afford something like that. Karen showed you around, showing you the closets and where to find everything before she led you up the stairs. There were two additional floors to the large house and more than enough rooms for everyone. In fact, you were pretty sure there might be some spare rooms. It made you smile though. Your current pack house had multiple people crammed into rooms with you, Kos and Atti taking up the smallest with your measly pile of blankets. This way, people didn’t need to share if they didn't want to, although you knew you three still would. You couldn't imagine getting used to sleeping alone and you were already dreading tonight. You were also happy to find out there were three separate bathrooms, all with a bath and a shower that worked on heated water and not rain water.

“This is the Alpha’s room but I presume you and Atticus will be staying here too,” she smiled as she opened the last door on the top floor. There was no judgment in her tone which you were thankful for and you glanced around with raised brows. The room was as nice as the one you’d been staying in at the castle with a large bed in the middle. You walked over, sitting on it and grinning as it bounced lightly.

“I can’t believe we get a real bed,” you mused softly, running your hand over the soft furs over the end of the bed.

“You don’t have beds back at home?” Karen asked, looking mildly shocked and you shook your head.

“The pack members do but we don’t. We didn’t have enough and our room is so small I don’t even know if a bed would fit,” you snorted ruefully and she nodded.

“The large building just to the right near the castle is the mess hall. That's where we all gather for breakfast, lunch and dinner. The King and his men usually eat there too, King William doesn’t like eating in his own dining chambers much unless there's a reason for it. Breakfast is at 8AM, lunch is at noon and dinner is at 6PM,” she said with a smile and a nod, like she was ticking off a mental checklist.

“I’m trying to think if I’ve missed anything…” she murmured with a thoughtful look.

“Oh, you don’t have to move in here tonight. I know being alone in a big house like this might be a little…. disconcerting. You’re welcome to stay in your room in the castle until everyone comes back,” she smiled and you relaxed a little. The idea of sleeping alone was already something you weren’t looking forward to, you weren't sure how you’d cope in the whole house alone. At least at the castle there was a general hustle and bustle of all the people and staff there.

“I appreciate that, thanks,” you nodded and her smile widened.

“Okay, I think that’s everything. Oh, one more thing! King William is in the process of having uniforms made for your pack. Obviously, you’ll still be your pack, even if you’re here working for the King. so you’ll have uniforms different to everyone else. They should be ready in a day or two,” she explained.

“No dress for me please,” you snorted and she smiled to herself.

“Don’t worry, King William already learned his lessons with that one,” she grinned and you felt a little embarrassed it had been so obvious how much you’d hated the dress but at least you didn’t have to worry.

“Alright, I think that's it. I’ll leave you to it. Feel free to explore the grounds and get a feel for the place. Obviously don’t go into other people’s houses and you can explore the castle, but I’d avoid going into random rooms as some of them are off limits. If you get hungry, feel free to come to the mess hall when it's time,” she smiled.

“Thank you,” you smiled back and she nodded.

“No problems. If you need anything, you can just ask a staff member for help or they can mindlink me or one of the others if you need them. I’ll see you later.” With that, she was off and you were alone in the house. It was eerily quiet and you didn’t like it. You couldn't wait for everyone to get here, you missed them all.

You wound up missing lunch, feeling a little uncomfortable and not too hungry. Instead, you explored every inch of your new house, wanting to get to know it better. You’d even laid on the soft bed for a while enjoying it. Maybe it was also a little petty on your part because you wanted to get your scent all over it first just to annoy Atticus when he got here. When dinner time rolled around, you were bored, lonely and incredibly hungry. You considered going back to the room in the castle to get your furs but it meant going all the way up there just to come back out. You didn’t think you’d need them anyway, you’d probably head back to the room after dinner and try to go to sleep early so you didn’t dwell on being on your own. You set off out, seeing some of the wolves here heading into the large mess hall building and you made your way over too. When you walked inside, it felt like the place was even bigger. It was filled with chatter as people sat at the tables together as they ate and seemed to have a good time. You lingered just inside the doorway off to the side a little as you looked around. You felt quite out of place and had no idea where to sit. Every table had people on them and you didn’t much feel like going and introducing yourself. You never normally had to be so social with people you didn't know and you didn't like it.

“Hey, Y/N,” you whipped around at your name to see Frank there giving you a smile.

“Hey, Frank,” you smiled back, unsure how to really talk to the man. Not only did you not know him but you weren’t sure what the etiquette was. He was a Beta, same rank as you. Normally there wasn’t any hierarchy between you and other Betas, but this was the King’s Beta.

“You look a little overwhelmed,” he murmured wryly and your lips tugged up, heat tinging your cheeks at being so obvious.

“Just a bit. It’s a lot of people,” you replied quietly, eyes sweeping the place.

“Come on,” he grinned, leading the way. You followed behind him, noticing how as he passed, wolves were bowing their heads in respect to him. It wasn’t just him though, they were doing it to you too and you weren't sure you’d get used to it. Respect from your own pack, sure. From others, not so much. He led you to the sprawling counter that had trays and trays of food to pick from. You grabbed a plate before grabbing some potatoes, chicken and some vegetables as Frank lingered around you. Once your plate was full, you grabbed a glass that you filled with water from a jug before you followed him to wherever he was taking you. It didn’t take long to see he was taking you to his table, one that was mostly full and it seemed like he'd stopped eating to help you as his half eaten plate was still on the table next to Karen. Karen's face lit up when she saw you and Curtis gave you a smile and a nod. Your eyes drifted to the King then. Karen had already mentioned he preferred eating in here but it was still strange to you to see a King eat with his men like this. Even with his jacket on he looked casual yet put together. He looked up at you as you approached and a wide smile stretched across his face that made you feel lightheaded. Frank went over to his seat and you hovered uncertainly near the only other empty one next to the King.

“You gonna sit down?” he asked, sounding amused and you bit your lower lip as you nodded, moving to sit down with your food.

“You settlin’ in well?” he asked softly, dark eyes boring into you as you toyed with your fork.

“I’m trying…. Adjusting…” you murmured with a shrug and a snort and he nodded with a smile.

“I get that. I know it’s a lot but… I hope with time that you’ll be happy here,” he said it so sincerely, like he actually gave a crap if you settled in.

“Thank you, Your Majesty,” you smiled somewhat shyly.

“Billy,” he corrected instantly and your eyes widened a little, darting to the others at the table who were talking among themselves yet seemed to keep an eye on you too.

“But… we’re not alone,” you pointed out ruefully, raising a brow.

“What? These assholes? They don’t count,” he snorted and an incredulous laugh left your lips at the same time Frank smacked him across the back of the head.

“Oh, we don’t count, huh? Asshole,” Frank huffed playfully and your eyes went back and forth between them. It reminded you of you and Atti and it was so strange to think the King himself was capable of being playful that you felt a little speechless.

“Don’t mind these two, you’ll get used to it,” Curtis grinned at you and you smiled with a nod. You started eating as they all chatted casually. You couldn't work out if they were carefully picking more mundane things to talk about because you were in their presence or if this was how their dinners usually went, more relaxed and chilled out. You couldn't really suss the whole thing out, you really hadn’t even expected to be eating with them. You’d thought you and your pack would eat with the ‘commoner’ wolves or something but now you were here, you realized it wasn't like that here. While there was an obvious hierarchy, the King didn’t mind mingling with his people, didn’t seem to see them as less than him at all and it was a pleasant surprise. You’d really had him all wrong but it wasn’t like you’d ever even met him before.

“How’s the house? Do you like it?” The King asked after you finished your food and you glanced at him.

“It’s amazing. It's way more than what we have now, I think everyone’s going to be happy with it,” you smiled genuinely. You couldn't wait for your pack to see it, electricity and decent water and all. It was more than what you’d been able to give them, even if they still cherished what they had now. He smiled at your words, looking pleased by them and you were once again struck by how much he seemed to care. You were really gaining a lot of respect for him as King that he valued his people so much.

“Good. And if you ever need anything, don’t be afraid to ask me. Don’t matter what it is,” he said firmly and you smiled again.

“Thank you, Your- … Billy,” you snorted, rolling your eyes at yourself as he shot you a toothy grin.

“Have you explored the castle grounds yet?” he asked curiously and you shook your head.

“Just what Karen showed me on the tour,” you admitted. You wanted to at some point but it had been a lot to take in so soon and all on your own, it was a little depressing.

“Did you see the Royal Gardens?” he asked and your interest perked up as you shook your head again. You didn’t even realize there were Royal Gardens here.

“If you want, I could show you. I planted everythin’ myself, it’s a pretty peaceful place. I like it there,” he murmured. You blinked at him for a moment before nodding with a smile. You really hadn’t expected an escort from the King himself but you didn't want to offend him by saying you could go by yourself. Besides, he seemed like a nice guy and it was good getting to know him like this. Karen had told you he respected you so you wondered if he was trying to forge a friendship of some kind or just spend time with the newbie in the group. Maybe he felt sorry for you knowing you were all alone and maybe it was obvious how much it was bothering you.

“I’d like that,” you said and the smile he gave you was blinding. You wondered if being so ridiculously handsome was part of the Demigod package.

“We can go now if you’re done,” he suggested as he quirked a brow and you nodded, watching as he stood and the others gave him a look you weren’t quite sure of.

“I’ll see you guys later,” he smiled at them and you stood too, following him out of the building.

When you got outside, the chill bit at you. It was dark now and you cursed yourself for not bringing your furs. You tried to ignore it though as you both silently made your way around the back of the castle. The first thing you noticed was the large archway carved out of a bush. It turned into carved walls that seemed to line what you presumed to be the gardens inside. They were covered with red flowers that you had no idea the name of but you looked around, finding something soothing by how pretty it was.

“Come on,” he grinned, leading you through the archway. Your breathing hitched as you looked around in wonder, eyes taking in the large space. There was a huge water fountain in the middle carved out of what you could only presume was marble. There was the moon in a crown, balancing on four wolves heads, each wolf facing North, East, South and West. The water was coming out of their muzzles and into the fountain that had a gentle sound to it. There were four big wooden benches, each aligning with the wolves around the fountain and around the benches were tons of flowers and bushes and shrubs that went on for what felt like forever. It was so colorful, even under the blanket of the night sky and the stars above you only seemed to make it more so.

“Oh my Gods,” you murmured in awe, your eyes not being able to decide what to look at first.

“It’s beautiful, right?” he asked and you turned your eyes to him then.

“It’s… I don’t even have words. It’s the most beautiful place I’ve ever seen,” you replied in a whisper and he stood up taller, a proud smile on his face that you didn't blame him for.

“You really planted all this by yourself?” you asked incredulously.

“I had a lot of time on my hands,” he shrugged impishly and you smiled with a nod. You moved over to a shrub next to you that had deep purple flowers on them, reaching out to gently touch the flower. As you did, a shiver ripped through you and you quickly wrapped your arms around yourself to stave off the cold. You heard rustling next to you and when you looked over, the King was shrugging off his jacket before he gently placed it around your shoulders. The warmth hit you instantly, as did his scent that you found pleasing. You hadn’t paid much mind to it before, but now it was wrapped around you, you found the scent of bergamot and orange blossom calming.

“You don’t have to give me your jacket, Your Majesty” you frowned softly with a shake of your head.

“Billy,” he corrected with a smirk and you gave him a look.

“Billy… You don’t need to-” you started and he cut you off.

“You really think I’m gonna stand here and let a beautiful woman freeze to death? What kinda gentleman do you think I am?” he snorted. You felt your cheeks heat up at his complement, the very idea of someone like the King finding you attractive being alien to you, but then Atticus’ words flew through your brain rapidly and you frowned. His smirk melted off his face at seeing your frown and then he was mirroring you. You opened your mouth before closing it again, trying to choose your words carefully as you reminded yourself this was the King you were talking to.

“I hope this doesn’t come across as rude or out of turn, but… I’m not going to sleep with you,” you muttered warily, looking at him carefully as you felt nerves bloom in your belly. King or no King, you wanted it to be perfectly clear. His brows rose a little before his eyes narrowed.

“What?” he asked slowly. You shifted on your feet, feeling more than uncomfortable at the situation you found yourself in.

“I don’t know if I’m just reading it all wrong but… I’m flattered if you find me attractive but I won’t be another notch on your bed,” you clarified. You tried to be firm and held eye contact, even knowing it could get you into even more trouble. But from what you’d seen of him so far, he didn't seem one for rules so much. A look crossed his face you couldn't read and it made you nervous, but then he rolled his shoulder, a mirthless chuckle leaving his lips.

“You heard about that then?” he asked tensely.

“I mean… I’m not one for gossip, but I’ve heard some things,” you confessed. You didn’t want to say you’d only heard them from Atticus because he didn’t seem pleased about the whole thing and you didn’t want to get him into trouble. His dark eyes came back to you then and they seemed to burn with something that made your heart beat faster.

“They meant nothin’ to me,” he insisted and you blinked at him.

“Is that supposed to make me feel better?” you asked derisively. If he was planning on adding you to that list, he was doing a poor job of convincing you.

“No, I didn’t mean…” he growled, running a hand through his perfect hair and making it a little messy and you watch on warily as a myriad of emotions seemed to pass his face at the speed of light.

“Will you… will you sit down?” he asked, giving you an imploring look. You weren’t sure why but he looked sad and you were confused. You nodded, moving over to a bench mostly because he was the King and you’d already managed to upset him. He moved to sit next to you but it didn’t escape you that he left space between you both and you were relieved.

“You got this all wrong. I don’t want you to be a notch in my bed, it ain’t like that,” he sighed as he stared off at the fountain. You found yourself playing with the golden hem of his jacket that still hung around you as your eyes darted from him to the fountain.

“Then what is it like?” you asked softly, being careful to not sound like you had an attitude. You were just confused and curious. You’d gladly accept you had it wrong if he could try and tell you what he meant because if you were honest, it made no sense to you that the Demigod Lycan King would find you remotely attractive enough to take you to bed, not when you knew what kind of women he probably surrounded himself with. His eyes left the fountain and then pinned you in place with such intensity that you found yourself averting your eyes, unable to help it as you submitted to his Alpha.

“You don’t gotta look away from me like that,” he insisted harshly and your eyes snapped back to him then. You felt so unsure of yourself right now and you didn't like it.

“I think you’re one hell of a woman. Yeah, you’re attractive, but that ain’t… You’re intelligent, cunning, an amazin’ fighter. I heard all the stories about you and maybe some of ‘em are embellished, but I know what you’re capable of. I respect you for that, I respect you and your Alpha and your Gamma for everythin’ you’ve done, not just for the Kingdom but for your own pack. I respect the fact you came from nothin’ and built it all from the ground up, that you gave a home to those that needed one. I’m not here lookin’ to get you into bed, I just want… I wanna be friends. I wanna get to know you ‘cause you’re here and you're a part of this now, you’re part of a bigger group, my pack. You’re family now,” he said vehemently, his obsidian gaze burning into you. You swallowed thickly, fighting the urge to look away as it hit you again. You felt stupid now. You’d assumed something you knew wouldn't be possible because you’d allowed Atti to get in your head and now you’d made a fool of yourself in front of the King when all he’d wanted to do was befriend you.

“I’m sorry,” you murmured with a frown.

“Don’t be. I didn’t meanta come across that way, it’s my fault. I just wanna get to know you better,” he explained. An uncomfortable silence fell over you then and you didn't know quite what to say after you’d ruined something so innocent. A chilly wind swept through the gardens and you pulled the jacket tighter around yourself as your eyes moved to look at some flowers. You were just about to try and politely excuse yourself to save you from the embarrassment you were feeling when he spoke up again.

“I know you heard the rumors about the other women, but I dunno if you know why,” he started, leaning his forearms on his legs as he leaned forward. He wasn’t looking at you, once again staring broodingly at the fountain.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me,” you frowned and he scoffed, shaking his head a little.

“I want to. I just… I’ve been around a long damn time and the whole time, all I ever wanted was my mate. I went so long without her and each day was like hell to me,” he muttered. Your frown deepened a little at the pain you heard in his voice and you felt a pang of guilt for him.

“I get urges just like anyone else and I tried for so long to ignore it, but after a while, I caved ‘cause I’m weak. My wolf… He gets restless and it makes me nervous. I can’t shift, not after what happened last time, not after-” he cut himself off, mouth clamping shut as a haunted look passed his face and he sat up straighter. Your mind drifted to the stories you knew of what happened the last time he shifted and you felt bad for him again.

“So I get my urges out before somethin’ bad happens. And after I just feel… I’m disgusted with myself. I feel so much shame and grief and guilt that it buries me alive and I fuckin’ hate myself,” he seethed. You blinked warily at him, the urge to reach out and try to comfort him gnawing at you but you knew it wasn’t appropriate so you clapped your hands in your lap.

“I hate myself ‘cause my mate’s out there and I don't wanna hurt her, I don't want her to be disgusted with me that I didn’t save myself for her, don’t want her to feel like I don’t want her or love her, ‘cause I do,” he ranted insistently.

“I’m sure she’ll understand,” you murmured, making his eyes snap to you. You were surprised to see how glassy they were and you felt an ache in your chest at how vulnerable he looked.

“Like you said, you’ve been around a long time. It’s a long time to wait, it's not like everyone else. I mean, I know how lonely I get, I can’t even imagine what it’s like for you,” you added softly. You meant it too. Some wolves didn’t even save themselves for their mate even though they didn't have to wait for as long as he had. Things were different for him, you couldn't blame him for that.

“You really mean that?” he whispered hoarsely, eyes boring into you like you held all the answers. You weren't quite sure why he was speaking to you about this, why he was letting this out to a stranger. Why he was letting you see him so vulnerable and stripped down. But you could see clearly that this was something that weighed heavily on him and you could only presume he spoke to Frank or the others about this. That maybe it was different for him to talk to someone not in his inner circle.

“I do. The fact you feel guilty about it shows you love her already and with the added stress of having to keep you wolf calm because you can’t shift… It’s understandable,” you shrugged, giving him a small smile. He blinked at you slowly for a long moment before his shoulder relaxed and he nodded.

“Thank you,” he breathed sincerely, eyes darting around your face.

“You don’t need to thank me, I’m just being honest. She’s your mate, so I’m sure she’ll understand,” you murmured. Another strange silence settled over you both and your eyes drifted to the moon in the sky.

“Do you think of your mother when you look at the moon?” you asked curiously, wanting to change the subject as you felt way out of depth with it. He chuckled and you looked away from the moon to him and he was grinning wistfully at you. You were glad you made him smile, it was better than him beating himself up.

“Yeah… Yeah, I do,” he smiled, his own eyes drifting up to the moon with a fond look.

“Are you excited for the full moon?” he asked knowingly as he looked back to you and you smiled. Even though he could shift at will, he was the only one and he was surrounded by other wolves just like you. You knew how they got when the full moon was coming.

“I’m always excited. It's the only time I can feel it,” you murmured softly, a sad smile on your face.

“What d’you mean?” he asked. You glanced at him and he was staring intently at you.

“I don’t… I can’t feel my wolf. It happened after… “ you trailed off as your chest burned and you blinked rapidly at the fountain. It felt like your heart was tying itself in a knot and you took a shaky breath. Suddenly, the feeling eased, the knot untying itself as the burning soothed. It was similar to the feeling of Karen's spell yet different and you frowned in confusion, your hand absentmindedly coming to your chest as you rubbed it. You cleared your throat and looked back to the King who was looking at you patiently, a sad look on his face and you felt your cheeks burn.

“After what happened to my pack, I just couldn't feel my wolf like normal. Couldn't hear it, couldn't feel it… just nothing. The full moon when I shift is the only time we seem to be connected. I just miss it,” you explained quickly, not wanting to talk about it any more. He frowned but nodded, looking away as he licked his lower lip before his eyes darted back to you.

“I’m sorry you went through that. Maybe… maybe one day you’ll get to be connected again,” he murmured. You nodded with a smile that wasn’t quite genuine on your face.

“Yeah… maybe,” you mused, not really believing it. You’d thought that once, thought that one day the wolf would come back to you properly, but it had been a long time now and nothing had changed so you were starting to think you were stuck like this. You felt broken.

“Did you see the lake when you came to the castle?” he asked and you were glad for the change of subject.

“No,” you shook your head, looking at him curiously.

“I’ll take you sometime. It’s a nice place to just sit and be with nature, I think you’d really like it,” he smiled softly and it made you smile too.

“I’d really like that,” you nodded and he grinned with a nod, looking pleased with himself.

“I should probably go to bed. It’s late and hopefully, everyone will be here tomorrow,” you sighed. You found yourself not really wanting to leave. You enjoyed his company even with the heavy topics you’d discussed. Other than your pack members, you’d never told anyone you couldn't feel your wolf and you were unsure why you’d confessed it to the King. But he’d also been raw and honest with you and you felt like you’d gotten to know him better. That had been what he wanted, after all.

“I’ll walk you back,” he replied as he stood. You stood too, taking one last look at the beautiful gardens before he led you out of the archway.

“Am I okay to come here? It’s beautiful here,” you asked softly, looking up at him as you walked. His lips tugged up as he nodded.

“You can go anytime you like, you don’t need permission. And if you ever need company, don’t be afraid to ask,” he grinned and you smiled to yourself.

The silence between you wasn’t uncomfortable this time as you walked into the castle and up the stairs. He walked you right to your room and you lingered outside for a moment. It had been a long time since you made a new friend and never one that wasn’t in your pack.

“Thank you for taking me… and for this,” you smiled as you took off his jacket and handed it to him. He clutched it as he smiled, licking his lower lip as he tilted his head at you.

“It was my pleasure. Have a good night, My Lady,” he smirked, bowing to you and you snorted.

“My Lord,” you gave him a fake curtsy, and his smirk turned into a lopsided grin. You looked at him for a second longer before you opened the door. Part of you wanted him to stick around, the impending loneliness waiting for you in the room making dread settle in your stomach. But he was King, he had better things to do than keep you company. You’d already taken up his time. You closed the door before leaning against it, glaring at the empty room in front of you. It was so quiet and you hated it. You blew out a sigh before getting undressed and into your sleep clothes. You didn't like long nightgowns and instead opted for a long sleep tunic that the men usually wore. Once ready for bed, you climbed into it. It felt like it swallowed you whole with how big it was with no one with you. You felt an ache settle in your chest and you chided yourself for being so weak. You were a grown up, you could sleep by yourself without it being the end of the world. Then why did you feel like this? You sighed, rolling over to your side as you took a deep inhale. You could still smell Kosmos and Atticus and you tried to let it soothe you. You could still smell the King too on your skin from his jacket and you found yourself relaxing a little, letting the mix of scents calm you down. After a while of some deep inhales, you found yourself drifting off to sleep.

Taglist: (if you’ve been asked to be tagged and aren’t here, it wouldn’t let me tag some people.)

@firexfate

@blanchedelioncourt

@on-ya

@sunshinedaisies-anddeath

@snowkestrel

@music-indie-tv

@idaofinfinity

@sweetserendipity65

@ramadiiiisme

@k-marzolf

@celestialams

@woowwwee

@noortsshift

@rainbowgoblinfan

@mysweetlittledesire

@promnightbinbaby

@intothesoul

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billyrussohaven · 1 year

Text

Into My Web

Chapter 21

Dark!Vampire!Billy Russo x Female Reader

Cowritten with @the-cult-of-russo

Ratings: Explicit 18+ ONLY

"What's that?" You asked as Billy entered the bedroom with a long and heavy looking garment bag. You were reading on the bed relaxing after a wonderful day out with him. He took you to get your hair and nails done since you enjoyed it so much last time.

"A gift," he smirked as he stopped by the bed.

He unzipped the bag and carefully took out the most amazing evening gown you've ever laid eyes on. Your brain could barely even comprehend how perfect the dress was. You tore your gaze from the dress to look at him in awe.

"Is...is it for me?" You whispered looking back and forth between him and the perfect dress he was holding out for you.

"No, it's for me," he snorted wryly with a playful roll of his eyes.

"Of course it's for you. Put it on and go downstairs. I'll be waitin'," he said firmly. He laid the dress on the bed carefully, shooting you one last smirk before he left the room. He was already in one of his suits since he'd briefly been at work that day, looking sharp as he liked to do.

He'd stopped by one of his favorite restaurants after work, picking up some nice food. He didn't much feel like eating out but he wanted to do something to reward you after the whole hunter thing. You'd saved his life and picked him and since you'd still been behaving, he was still in the process of treating you well and rewarding you. He also enjoyed fancy dinners himself and it had been a while since he'd been able to indulge. It would be nice to experience it once again.

He'd set up the dining area all nice. Candles, flowers, soft music to set the mood. It was far more romantic than he liked but he knew you'd appreciate it. Girls ate this shit right up. He'd tried to make it just like it would be if he took you out for a fancy dinner, just without the prying eyes and stuck up assholes. Maybe one day he'd take you to one of his favorite upscale places, but today wasn't that day. Today was all about you. About reinforcing your good behaviour and treating you for saving him. He was a proud man but he wasn't too proud to admit that he'd be dead if it wasn't for you.

You quickly undressed and took the beautiful dress in your hands. It felt like liquid silk on your skin, it touched you deeply that he'd get you something this special. You put the dress on, carefully zipping it up and paired it with the best pair of shoes you owned. They weren't sexy high heels but they'd do.

You made your way downstairs like he asked and gasped in surprise seeing what he had prepared. He never ever did something that special for you, ever. It touched you deeply. Everything was perfect, from the music to the beautifully arranged dinner table to him.

"Wow…" you whispered, looking around and stopping right in front of him. Your heart beat fast and your chest filled with the overwhelming fuzzy feeling you had when he was around. You were starting to get a pretty good idea of what feeling it was and it felt amazing, pure. Love…

Billy's eyes widened a little seeing you this dressed up for him. He'd always thought you were beautiful, from the moment he first laid eyes on you in the house in Nevada. But you looked almost like royalty and if he was breathing you'd have stolen his breath away. He was pleased by how appreciative you seemed about it. He always enjoyed when you were grateful for the things he did. It soothed something in him. He moved over to your chair, pulling it out for you with a cheeky smile. When you sat down, he pushed your chair in before moving to his own and sitting down.

"So I'll be honest, I didn't cook this. But I got it from one of my favorite places and I had to pay good money to get 'em to do take out for me," he smirked, popping open a bottle of wine. He poured you a glass and then himself as he looked over at you.

"You look beautiful, kitten," he murmured with a smile. He wondered if one day he'd be able to take you to a fancy gala or event. He used to frequent them before he purchased you and he ended up spending most of his time home with you so you didn't escape. He'd love to show you off at a place like that, have you on his arm. You'd easily be the prettiest girl there and you were all his.

You gave him a warm smile and reached for his hand over the table without thinking.

“Thank you. I don’t even know what to say…” you chuckled, shaking your head at the most expensive dinner you ever had and probably will ever have.

“This is amazing. I feel like a princess,” you said looking down to hide the bashful smile and your blushed cheeks. You picked up your wine glass and raised it.

“What shall we drink to?” you smirked looking straight in his dark eyes. He tilted his head as he thought for a moment.

"To life," he grinned as he raised his own glass.

“To life then,” you repeated, taking a sip of the fancy wine he had picked. It was like sweet velvet on your tongue and you moaned appreciating the taste of it. You waited for him to start eating before picking up your own cutlery. The sound you made after taking your first bite was plain obscene, definitively not princess material. You froze, opening your eyes to look at him sheepishly as you swallowed down. He chuckled as he quirked a brow, eating his food.

"Glad you like it so much," he said with a wry smirk.

“Oh, I don’t think I’ve ever tasted something so good,” you said, taking another sip of your drink.

“Beside you, of course,” you added putting the wineglass down and resumed eating with a little smirk playing on your lips. His fork paused mid-air, lips still parted and ready to take a bite as he looked at you. They tugged up into a smirk before he popped the forkful of food into his mouth and ate it.

"Is that right?" He asked playfully, enjoying the mood you were in. It was nice, having a fancy dinner and the atmosphere light like this.

“Mmmhm!” you hummed, looking everywhere but at him as you ate, not giving him too much attention on purpose. You were in a very playful mood, it felt so casual, so normal to have a nice dinner like this with him, to tease him a bit. You smiled thinking just how grateful to have him in your life.

The dinner was full of light conversation and teasing and Billy found himself actually having a pretty good time. Once the food was done, he moved to put the dishes in the sink, unable to help himself, but he'd clean up properly later. He glanced at you on the way back to the table, sitting there all pretty and coy. He smiled to himself as he walked over to your chair.

"Care for a dance?" He asked with an impish grin, holding his hand out for you. It had been a while since he'd danced with anyone but he was in good spirits and he thought you might like it.

Your face lit up, beaming back at him nodding. You took his hand, following him to the living room.

“Let’s hope I won’t step on your toes,” you chuckled. You’ve never actually danced with anyone like this. You’ve seen it often in movies but to experience it was something else entirely. You moved one hand to his shoulder and held his hand with the other.

"Nah, it's easy," he smirked, settling a hand on your waist as he started moving the pair of you.

You followed his lead, moving slowly to the music, your body flush to his as you enjoyed the moment. You felt oddly nervous, being this close to him, this intimate. It didn't make any sense since you've seen him naked and done many vulgar sex acts together. But you felt nervous nonetheless as you looked up in his eyes, licking your dry lips. Your heartbeat quickened, your eyes flickering to his lips. You wanted to kiss him, to feel his hand cradle your head delicately, to feel him kiss you back and lose yourselves to this special feeling growing inside your heart.

Billy watched you as you both gently swayed together. He felt mesmerised by you, watching you intently as the music played softly in the background. He wasn't quite sure just why you seemed extra alluring tonight. Maybe it was the dress, or the ambience he'd set for the night. Or maybe it was just you. He wasn't sure but he couldn't take his eyes off you. The hand on your waist slid around to settle just above your ass and he loved how the silky fabric felt beneath his hand against your body. He was aware he was being a little… soft, but he put it down to you saving him and really earning his trust. It wasn't something he took for granted or that he'd forget.

You leaned forward ever so slightly, fighting the nerves eating you up from the inside. You didn't realize you both stopped dancing as you held each other's close, lips hovering so close but so far. The moment your lips connected it felt like the entire universe shifted upside down. Your heart was hammering inside your chest, your hands moist and shaky, lungs out of breath. It felt like you were kissing him for the first time. It consumed you entirely. You trailed a hand to the back of his neck , caressing it and pressing him closer to you. He moved closer, pressing his body against yours as his tongue explored every inch of your mouth. The hand not near your ass moved to the back of your head as his fingers wound into your hair. You tasted like the expensive wine and something that was uniquely you that he'd always enjoyed. It was intoxicating and he felt drunk on you as he devoured your mouth eagerly with a soft moan.

You kissed him like it'd be the last, putting everything into it, your entire soul reaching out for his damned one. Your tongue twirling around his, gasping softly for air as he gently tugged on your hair, his kiss getting even more heated as he pressed his aching bulge against you. He wanted you badly, more than he could ever remember and he idly wondered if the food he'd picked was some kind of aphrodisiac. You'd always been like a siren to him, since the first time he laid eyes on you. Luring him in with your call to the rocky shores. But it felt overwhelming tonight and he lost himself completely in the kiss, his body taking control as his mind turned off.

He broke the kiss, a tiny voice in the back of his head reminding him you had to breathe, even if he didn't. His eyes were flickering between his usual pools of black to a deep red as he stared at you for a moment, the beast inside of him wanting nothing more than to tear your dress off and fuck you right here in the living room. He was trying to push his beast back in a box, wanting to enjoy the night properly, not wanting it to end so soon. He scooped you up bridal style, moving to go upstairs to the bedroom. You smiled at him with your arms around his neck as he carried you upstairs. Enjoying how soft he was with you today, how happy and peaceful he made you feel.

He set you on your feet in the bedroom as his lips descended on yours once again. He couldn't help himself. His hands were everywhere, memorising your body like he was going to sculpt it from memory. The kiss was dirty and heated as he slowly backed you up towards the bed. The only thought in his head being how much he needed to be inside of you. You slid the expensive dress off your body, letting it drop to your feet. Your mind was too busy with him kissing you hungrily to care about it. A gasp left your lips as you broke the kiss to move on the bed, your eyes never leaving his.

He climbed onto the bed, hovering over you as his eyes soaked in the sight of you looking so perfect and ready for him. His perfect little kitten. He was still clothed but he didn't care as he pressed his body over yours, nipping at your lower lip playfully. You chuckled over his lips with an overwhelming happiness and warmth blooming inside your chest.

"I love you," you whispered over his soft lips. It came out of you so easily, so naturally you barely registered it. You felt him tense up and you knew it had been a mistake. But how can love and adoration be a mistake? Isn't this what he wanted all along? You adoring him like he was the only light in your pitiful existence? You breathing for his touch, his attention and the praise at serving him well? He was your savior, he took you from that awful place and gave you a home. He made sure you'd only have him, only him to run back to. So why was he closing himself up? Why did you feel him so...shocked? Angry?

"Billy?" You whispered, caressing the side of his face.

He just blinked at you for a moment, pure shock on his face. Your words pinged around his brain like a ping pong ball on speed. I love you, I love you, I love you, I lov-. He was gone quicker than you could blink, using his vamp speed to not only leave the room, but the house too. The door slammed behind him as he made a beeline to his car. His mind was blank as he got inside starting the car before tearing out of the driveway. After a phone call to Frank, asking him to meet up at their usual dive bar, Billy was speeding down the road, hands gripping the steering wheel. He'd been through quite a few emotions since he'd started driving but now he'd settled on anger. Who the hell did you think you were? You were nobody, nothing but a pet. A sweet piece of ass that was pretty enough to catch his interest. You meant nothing to him and you dared to throw those words at him. But if you were nothing then why for the briefest of moments after you said those words did he feel… pleased? He'd felt pleased for less than a millisecond and it wasn't the same kind of pleased he'd feel when you behaved. It was different. It was close to happiness or some other bullshit and it left him confused. But then the shock had hit him. Shocked you'd said it, shocked you felt it and even more shocked by his reaction. And now here he was.

His head was a scrambled mess as he made his way to the bar. Despite all differences, calling Frank had been instinctual. Because no matter what, they were brothers and had each other's back. Billy wasn't really sure just what he wanted Frank for but he knew he didn't want to drink alone. Frank was good at sitting there and letting Billy rant on and vent. Sometimes he even had good advice. The bar they were going to was a vampire bar. It was pretty different to the other human bars they'd also frequent sometimes. This one had booze that could actually get vampires drunk. Billy wasn't sure how they managed it but he'd hardly complain. Normal booze didn't cut it anymore with his high vampire metabolism.

When Billy got there, he parked up and went right inside. It was as seedy as you'd expect for a vampire bar and if it wasn't for the magical alcohol, Billy wouldn't step foot in the place. He noticed Frank already there, sitting at the bar. Billy wasted no time in walking over and sitting beside him as he took his jacket off. He was grateful to see a drink already waiting for him. He downed it in one go, very aware of the apprehensive look Frank was throwing his way.

"That bad?" Frank asked wryly. Billy scoffed as he signalled the bartender to get him another.

"You got no idea, Frankie," he muttered, shaking his head.

"Hunters again?" Frank asked, mildly concerned as he shifted to face him a bit. Billy blew out a sigh, nodding in thanks after the bartender gave him his drink. He only sipped this one.

"Nope. Worse," Billy said in contempt. Frank's brows rose as he narrowed his eyes a little, leaning closer to Billy.

"Another threat?" He asked quietly, his body tensing and going on high alert. Billy looked at him and rolled his eyes.

"No. It's Y/N," Billy muttered vaguely. Frank's body seemed to tense even more.

"What about her? Somethin' happen to her?" He asked quickly. Billy's eyes once again rolled to the back of his head. He wasn't sure why Frank seemed to care so much. Always the white Knight.

"She told me she loved me," Billy bit out, glaring at Frank. Frank's mouth floundered for a moment in shock and Billy continued.

"Can you even fuckin' believe that? She loves me? Where the fuck does she get off sayin' that shit to me?" Billy seethed as he slurped his drink and finished it off. He was already starting to feel it and as he tried to get the bartender's attention, Frank grabbed his wrist to stop him. Billy turned his eyes to Frank and quirked a brow.

"C'mon, Bill. I already know you care about her, so drop the hard ass routine," Frank said firmly. Offence colored Billy's face and now it was his turn for his mouth to gape like a fish.

"Really? I care? That why you were so intent on whiskin' her away?" He asked mockingly, snatching his wrist from Frank's grasp. Frank heaved a sigh and wiped a hand over his face as he looked at him.

"Look, man… I still don't agree with the whole… human pet thing. But I saw it last time. You care. And you can sit there and lie to yourself but you can't lie to me," Frank insisted. Billy pursed his lips as he looked away, rolling his shoulder as his fingers drummed on the bar. He didn't say a word, his mind going a million miles a minute.

"Tell me, when she told you, how'd it make you feel?" Frank prodded. A growl rumbled in Billy's throat and a few other patrons looked over briefly before turning back to their own drinks.

"I ain't talkin' about this bullshit. I don't do feelin's and you know it," Billy hissed, gesturing for another drink uninterrupted this time.

"You don't wanna talk about it? Why am I here then? And maybe you didn't 'do' feelin's before, but obviously somethin' changed," Frank huffed.

When the drink was settled in front of Billy, he went to grab it but Frank's vampire reflexes stole it from him and he moved it out of reach to the side, earning a dirty look from Billy.

"Talk to me, brother," Frank implored quietly. With some vampire booze already in his system, Billy folded like a sheet of paper.

"I felt happy, alright? The first thing I felt when she told me was happy," he admitted, looking away and running a hand through his hair, making it go all over.

"Because you care," Frank added, giving him a knowing grin.

"Fuck you," Billy groaned, happy when Frank gave him his drink. He glugged half of it in one go before he moved to lay his head on his arms on the bar.

"I don't know what to do," he muttered, voice muffled by his arms.

"It's a good thing, right?" Frank asked curiously. Billy, now being slightly drunk, snorted as he sat back up, his hair comically disarrayed as he gave Frank a look.

"A good thing? You're gonna sit there and tell me this is healthy? That we could move past all the bullshit and have somethin' real? C'mon, Frankie. You know that ain't an option," he rambled as he shook his head. Frank was quiet for a long moment and Billy watched with dark eyes as he saw his words sink in. What he was getting at, what he meant.

"Right…" Frank sighed, taking a swig of his own drink.

"So you're not gonna pursue it 'cause of all the… shit you've done. But now you know you care and she cares, what now? You gonna keep goin' down the path you're on? Think you could do that to her now?" Frank asked seriously. Billy stared at the liquid in his glass, a frown marring his face. He was ruthless. Savage when he wanted to be. Lord knows he'd not been good to you. He wanted to say nothing would change but he wasn't sure that was true. Could he look into your beautiful eyes knowing how you felt about him and still punish you the same? It was all ruined. It only made him more annoyed at your words. That you had to go and ruin a good thing. Now everything was a mess and nothing would be the same.

Billy's mind was spiralling as he glared at his drink like it offended him. His silence had Frank watching him intently.

"What about… I don't know, lettin' her go? You care about her but you can't make it work with her. Just let her go and let her be happy," Frank suggested warily. The snarl ripped from Billy's throat was feral, as if Frank's words had caused him physical pain.

"I shoulda known you'd do this," Billy laughed mirthlessly, standing and grabbing his jacket.

"What? C'mon, Bill. Sit down and let's talk about this," Frank pleaded.

"Nah. I get it. You don't agree with it and you think I should let her go. But then what? She wouldn't know how to survive on her own. She'll go off and get herself killed," Billy seethed as he shoved his jacket on.

"You know, I came here thinkin' that despite all the bullshit, you'd have my back. But of course you couldn't do that. Always the good samaritan, right?" He growled, shooting Frank a look of betrayal. Frank's face fell as he shook his head.

"It's not… I do have your back, Bill. I'm just tryin' to be realistic, to see the bigger picture," Frank said firmly.

"See you around, Frankie," Billy muttered sadly, making his way out of the bar and leaving a despondent Frank sitting at the bar.

Billy made his way to his car, too many negative emotions coursing through him. He slammed his door shut, yelling as he punched the steering wheel out of pure anger. He was stupid to think Frank would care or that he'd have his best interests in mind. The first chance he gets to see a way in to suggest he let you go and he takes it. There was no chance in hell he could let you go. You were like a baby bird. You'd be dead in days without him to help you. And the idea of letting you go off to go and live a happy life without him made his chest burn in pain and fury. That wasn't an option. This was all your fault. Sure he and Frank's friendship was already strained but things got worse when you came along and now Frank saw him as nothing but a monster. You were the one that uttered those words to him and changed everything. Made it all wrong. You were the one that made him feel something. Billy Russo didn't have feelings. He cared about a few select people but never this way. And you come along and dare to make him actually feel things that did nothing but confuse him.

As he started the car and pulled away, a nasty thought occurred to him. After all of this, of making him realise and forcing him to acknowledge his feelings, it dawned on him that you didn't even really love him. He'd been conditioning you, playing mind games since the moment he took you home. He'd twisted your mind so badly that he'd made you think you loved him. Stockholm syndrome. That's what this shit was. And the realisation made him feel absolutely livid. The first time someone said those words to him in that way and it was all a lie, concocted by himself. And now he was stuck with the knowledge that he actually fucking cared about you while you were just suffering from trauma.

He couldn't do it. He couldn't have you, he couldn't keep you as things were knowing how he felt and he sure as fuck couldn't let you go to be happy without him. He knew deep down you deserved better than this, than a monster like him. He knew you didn't deserve the suffering he'd inflicted on you. And he knew it was his stupid goddamn feelings making him feel this way. Somewhere along the way he'd gotten attached to his little pet, saw you more than a human to do what he wanted. In his denial he'd carried on as normal although looking back he could see how he'd started to go a little soft. Suddenly all those weird warm feelings in his chest every time you were happy started to make sense to him. Maybe if he was a good man he'd just let you go. But he knew he couldn't ever do that. You were his and he'd never be able to just set you free. Through his alcohol hazed mess off a brain, he realised there was only one outcome to this. Unpleasant as the rest of them but the only option. Despite his feelings, he also hated you for making him go down this road. For making him go through this. Why couldn't you have just kept your damn mouth shut?

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