au where bella still gets pregnant on the honeymoon but bc edward didn’t jack off At All he still has sperm and it’s been alive this whole time bc it’s been on ice and therefor it’s just a fucking normal human baby
werewolves r superior bc like if u cuddle a vampire cold as shit actually post cancelled. why am i pitting 2 bad bitches against eachother ur vampire gf is wonderfully cool in the summer and ur werewolf gf is very soft to hug. peace and love on planet earht
tv exec out there dreaming up twilight modern!au rn, giggling & kicking their feet
If they're gonna make a twilight reboot, the least they can do is set it in 2005. I can't cope with these characters on social media, using modern slang.
suing stephanie meyer for inaccurate depictions of biology classes.
i met 0 vampires & got no onion awards. plus i had to memorize things like the interphase sub-phase synthesis being the point in mitosis that chromosomes are replicated to make sister chromatids. i’ll never recover from this. 5 weeks of studying & no marriage proposals from strange creatures or a single opportunity to become immortal. truly disappointed that stephanie would lie to me like this.
twitter limiting the amount of tweets you get to read per day is ridiculous but if tiktok limited the amount of videos people got to see per day it would be the biggest win for mental health since ssris