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anotherfangirlwrites · 5 months
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Now theyre both ded wtf hahaha
Cheating On You
Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader x Nanami Kento
Warnings: Major spoilers, mature content, mentions of death
Synopsis: Gojo has been trying to piece you back together but you're still stuck thinking about Nanami.
A/N: Fuck it, here's some angst. And Gojo cuddles (cus I sure could use one. And I know you do too.) It's pretty short though heehee.
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"Hey," his voice laced with sleep had you blinking up at him. "Get back to sleep, it's still too early." He coaxes, arms circling around you tighter. You plaster on a smile and nuzzled his neck, letting your eyes fall close. When you feel him drift back to sleep though, arm going lax around your bare hips, your eyes flutter open again. Your blank stare lost on the cobalt early morning sky outside your window, the rain pouring hard.
Today marks the 2nd year, you realize.
But only over 6 months since you've let Gojo Satoru in your life, the man who had been keeping the nightmares away, the very same one holding you right now. He swore that he would let you do things at your pace and you were grateful that he's been so patient.
Now, it has become a routine.
Waking up in the mornings next to him like this, enveloped in his strong, warm embrace, massive calloused hands holding your body lovingly. At night, he would lull you to sleep with words of reassurance as his lips graze your temple and your hair.
Gojo stayed by your side through everything. He committed to you when you know he wasn't one to do relationships. He took your broken pieces and convinced you that you are still worth loving. He thinks the world of you, loves you more than you actually deserve. Sometimes you wonder what you did to deserve him and gods know that you care for him too.
You wanted to return as much as he is giving. But everytime you find yourself finally opening up and finally giving an inch to Gojo's miles, your heart sinks and tears flood your eyes.
Unable to take it anymore, you carefully escape Gojo's embrace and locked yourself in the bathroom. You're spiraling again. Breathing becoming labored as your airways constrict. Your eyes instantly go to that one box on the shelves by your walk-in closet. A shaky sob escapes you as you pull the silky yellow patterned tie from the box, eyes falling close and finally allowing your tears to fall freely down your face.
Was it grief still? Regret? Guilt?
Your fingers tremble as you touch his old watch and glasses. Having half the mind to go through his old phone for the nth time to reread old conversations or cry your heart out at the photographs and clips on his gallery.
You miss him so much. And it still hurts just as bad as the day you got the call.
You know he's long gone. Your Kento. The man who held your heart for the longest time and made you the happiest you've been. Though you know that he would rather have you moved on by now than hiding away like this to shed tears for him, you couldn't help but still feel immense guilt.
But you have no clue how to stop feeling this way. Everytime Gojo would make you smile or laugh, everytime he makes your heart flutter, you couldn't help but feel as if you are cheating on Nanami. You aren't sure if this feeling would ever go away but you hoped that it would. Because Gojo has been so fucking good to you.
And he doesn't deserve to take only what you could spare. He does not deserve feeling like he's not enough. He does not deserve seeing you still so broken over someone who has been gone for years when he is doing everything he can to make you feel whole again.
"Y/n, I'm right here."
You hear Satoru's muffled voice outside the door and you heart breaks further as you realize that, yes you have him right there, but you still can't help but wish that it was Nanami instead.
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anotherfangirlwrites · 5 months
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origin trio in europe: the 2nd movie
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anotherfangirlwrites · 8 months
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Enji Todoroki × Reader, angst
Inspired by this Enji 🫠 Warnings: implied smut
The tips of your fingers are cold and numb. Stark contrast of the scalding ache in your chest that radiates through your entire being, bringing tears in your e/c eyes. Your tearful gaze flickers from the fancy invitation in front of you to the silhouette of the man that's been the bane of your existence since you have realized you have fallen for him.
Enji throws you a glance over his shoulder as he redresses. For a second, you thought you saw remorse flash through those devastatingly breathtaking ocean eyes.
"I don't expect you to come," he says, averting his gaze as his thick fingers work the buttons of his dress shirt. The same one he wore this morning to ask the hand of the woman he intends to marry. "But I figure it'd be far worse not to at least let you know."
You were quick to mask your despair with a well practiced smirk. "How considerate of you." You chide, your tone betraying your facade. You fill the following silence with the clicking of the lighter as you set a cigarette ablaze.
Now fully dressed, Enji walks around your bed to sit across from you by the window ledge. He reaches and touches your face, memorizing your beautiful features illuminated by the Musutafu city night lights knowing this will be the last time he'll see you. Like this, at least. With skin in technicolor from the works of his hands and mouth, hair a mess from being under his grasp and from rounds of being tossed around in bed, soft kiss bruised lips that he almost always wounds by biting a little too hard.
He glares at the cigarette between them and asks, "I thought you quit smoking?" He takes the thing from between your lips and you frown as you watch him put it out with his bare hand. "I did." You shrug. "I guess I just can't live without at least one bad thing in my life."
The both of you take a deep breath at the exact same time.
"So I take it this is goodbye, then?" You ask as you look out the window, already knowing the answer.
"I am a lot of things, but I will not add disloyal to my long list of flaws." He mutters. You smile wryly, keeping your eyes on the cars passing below your apartment building. You feel pathetic as you realize you're even considering being a fucking mistress if that meant getting to keep him in your life.
"Was there ever a chance? For you and I?" You couldn't help but ask. Thinking about how in the span of time you spent together, didn't you ever stand a chance in his heart? Despite giving this fucked up arrangement with him your all?
The question had Enji clenching his jaw. He long accepted that his heart is close to nonexistent. All he ever is to him is ambition and greed. But as he stares at you, for a split second, he almost wants to reconsider everything.
You startle when he suddenly pulls you to him, sitting you in his lap and kissing you hard. Salty tears slip past your lips and his, Enji couldn't tell whose it was. Your hands card through his crimson hair in a desperate attempt to keep him in your grasp, reveling in how his big rough hands seem to hold you with the same desperation. Kneading and pulling you bruisingly tight against his body.
But then, he pulls away, leaning his forehead against yours. And you knew your answer when you looked at him. When you saw his eyes squeezed shut, lips pressed into a thin line, nostrils flared as he pushed air down his lungs. He does love you, whether he admits it or not, it's just.. not enough. And it never will be. You never will.
"You are.. despicable." You whisper. "But I already knew that and chose to love you anyway." A sigh of defeat escapes you as you now look at him with pity.
"I hope you know that this marriage, the children you will bear with this innocent woman.. it would not result in you attaining this 'dream' of yours. You're going to put everyone in misery. And I refuse to be one of those people. Not anymore."
"Goodbye, Enji." You murmur as you crawl back in bed with your back against him. The moment you hear the door click close softly as he left, you sob against your pillow that still smells of him.
You probably cursed him the day he broke your heart completely, Enji thinks to himself as he stares at the protesting crowd outside the central hospital. He was still foggy with anesthetics but the ache in his heart was sharp and it brought him to tears.
You were right. You've always been.
And now that he's faced with the repercussions of the poor decisions he has made in the past, he could not help but wonder what if he just gave up on his selfish endeavors and accepted that fact that he can and could have been happy with you.
Sparing Rei, Fuyumi, Touya, Natsuo and Shoto from all this hell he brought to them.
If only he was smart enough then to realize then that maybe, you were all he needed.
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anotherfangirlwrites · 11 months
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SOMEONE TAKE THIS SITE AWAY FROM ME.
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anotherfangirlwrites · 11 months
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Soft.. so damn soft 🥺 he deserves it and soo much more 😭
Rubbing hand cream on Katsuki's hand after a day at work, he's staring at you all fondly. 🥺🥺🥺
Bakugou’s hands are important to him.
Not only do they harness his quirk, the calloused and hardened skin an indication of the battles he’s faced with his own two hands. Crafting colossal explosions from his palms as he wields the power to destroy, eviscerate and detonate.
Bakugou reckons he’d be nothing without his quirk, his hands. But really, he’d be nothing without yours.
You always hold him so tenderly, so gently with your hands. A stark contrast from the way his larger palms cradle you. Unlike his hands that were built for destruction, yours were made for love. The soft tips of your fingertips massage the creamy lotion into his skin, focusing on the rough callouses and cuts that mark his complexion. Cooing at him softly as you murmur how proud you are, how strong he is, how lucky you are.
But Bakugou knows that he’s the lucky one, especially in moments like these where you treat him with such care and adoration. Letting him melt into you as you cradle his palms in your hands, massaging the skin as though you’re transferring the weight of the world he holds heavy in his hands to you. So that when he returns home he’s no longer Dynamight, he’s just yours.
“Be more careful next time, silly.” You grumble, running the pad of your thumb over a fresh cut on the heel of his hand.
“Yeah, yeah. S’nothing,” He rasps back in return, but his crimson eyes soften at the way you lean down to press your lips to his moisturised skin.
Placing gentle kisses against every new mark he’s gained from the day, giving each one the same care and attention. As though lessening his burdens with each lingering peck. Any hurt or regret that he feels tight in his chest begins to disappear with the way you hold him, and Bakugou’s certain that you must have some kind of secret quirk to make him feel this way. To allow him to feel safe and at ease here in your arms, to let his guard down as you take care of him the same way Dynamight takes care of the world.
“Pretty,” He mumbles, the word spills from his lips before he even realises, wondering whether he’s even said it or merely thought it.
But the way your eyes meet his in a tender gaze shows you heard him, your lips curling into a soothing smile as you give both his hands a reassuring squeeze.
Bakugou always tells you that you don’t need to do this when he gets home, the warm jet of water from his shower washes away the soot and debris from the day as he strips off his dirty costume. A dull ache in his palms from the overuse of his quirk as he hisses when warm water hits the sore skin.
But you always insist. Telling him that you don’t want his injuries to get worse, or leave long-lasting scars. But really it’s because Bakugou holds the world up with his hands, it’s the least you can do to hold him up in yours. Bakugou’s hands are important. What he uses to hold you, save the world, the strength of his quirk.
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anotherfangirlwrites · 11 months
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When Gojo opened his eyes, everything was too bright.
His body aches, his head hurts, but at least he feels more like himself since he got out of that damn prison realm.
You jumped in your seat beside his bed and rushed to him when you finally see him stir awake. You quickly dialed in Shoko and alerted her. You see Gojo watch you with glassy eyes as you go check on him.
Your heart is beating hard and fast, you can feel your breathing shallow which you try your hardest to control as you try to push yourself into autopilot. Doing what you are supposed to as the resident doctor with Shoko busy tending to the other injured sorcerers, desperately trying to separate your sentiments from your duty.
"Y/n," He murmurs, cerulean eyes watching you curiously as you continue to tend to him. "I'm sorry-" He can see how you're holding back tears as you flashed your penlight across his eyes.
"Can you take a deep breath for me?" You try to keep your tone monotonous as you place the diaphragm of your stethoscope across his chest, effectively shutting him up. Gojo only complies because he didn't want to cause you any trouble. But his gaze never leaves your face. He sees your brows furrow and he thought you were starting to get annoyed but the truth is, you were trying to keep yourself from fully breaking down in front of him. No words can describe how happy you are to hear him breathing, hear his heart beating. And have him back here. Alive.
Once you start putting away your stet, Gojo tries again. His rough hand circling your wrist as he asks, "How have you been?"
It took you a second to think of a response. Should you tell him you have been crying yourself to sleep? Or not have been able to sleep at all thinking about him? With a sigh, you settle with, "I don't know. Same old, I guess." You shrug, avoiding his eyes. "Your vitals look good. I'm going to go get Ieiri-san." You mumble, pulling away from him. He didn't let you though, his grip tightening. "Can you hold on a second? Please?"
You swallow hard and try to pull away again with a shake of your head. "I was instructed to let them know when you finally wake. I got to go-"
Gojo clenches his jaw in frustration. He finally got to see you, no way in damn hell is he going to waste another fucking second away from you when you're right there. So tugs you closer and pulls you into a hug.
"Satoru," you want to sound annoyed but the tremor in your voice reveals how you're truly feeling. "I have to inform the elders that you're okay-"
"They can wait." He grumbles, burying his face in your hair.
Gojo sighs in relief when you finally melt against his embrace. But he frowns when you start silently sobbing, face pressing against the crook of his neck.
"You were gone." You croak. "You were gone for so long."
"1,095 days." He murmurs against your shoulder, staring blankly as he holds you tighter. "I counted the days until I can see you again. Until I can hold you again just like this."
He pulls away just enough so he could hold your face and wipe your tear streaked cheeks. "I'm sorry. I know you must have been scared."
How your eyes filled with more tears even though he just wiped the ones that had fallen from your lids told him that he was right. His heart broke seeing how miserable he has made you and he swore he'd do anything to make you happy again.
"Shhh, I'm here now." He crooned. "And I won't ever leave you again."
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"Ffffuuuu-" his face would turn red, eye twitching. Finally he settles with an aggravated, "Fudge!!!"
Making you laugh so hard that you end up just letting him curse again because he looks like he's going to have an aneurysm.
"Thank motherfucking heaveans!! Damn it!! I fucking love you, but shit, I just can't fucking do it."
You're going to roll your eyes at him because what a drama queen. "KATSUKI, IT'S ONLY BEEN AN HOUR."
"IT FELT LIKE A DAMN LIFETIME!!! DON'T FUCKING MAKE ME DO IT AGAIN!"
you force bakugo to give up cursing and he starts saying insane shit like golly gee as a filler
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Satoru mulled it over and over as he watched your chest rise and fall as you slept next to him. He dances around the truth, convinces himself he wants nothing more than physical intimacy but he always ends up struggling with the fact that he knows that if he ends whatever he has going on with you, it would devastate him. 
That thought of never being able to see you again. Or not being able to touch you. Kiss you. Make love to you.
The thought of letting you be with someone else. Just the idea of another person being able to taste those sweet soft lips of yours or make you feel the way he did just minutes ago has him pulling you into his arms, not giving a damn if the motion rouses you from slumber. 
"Satoru," you murmur, voice still thick with sleep. "What's wrong?"
Gojo catches your wrist as you reach up to touch his face. He plants a kiss in your palm and closes his eyes. All his life, having his infinity on was second nature to him but with you? He couldn't care less to be protected if it means being able to have you clouding all his senses. All he wants is to feel you. Be near you as much as he possibly could. 
And that's exactly where his dilemma lies. "The Delilah to your Samson," Ieiri once teased. "Only in this story, you will be the one doing the betraying." His brows furrow as he kisses your fingertips, thinking, You make me fucking weak, Y/n. That's what's wrong.
But at the same time.. you are where he draws strength the most. Because without you, he will lose all will to continue fighting. If he loses you, he loses all meaning.
But he also knows that if he stays with you.. you will end up getting hurt. It also does not help that everyone he has ever loved.. has ended up dead and gone.
He laughs to himself bitterly as his own words to Yuta rang in his head. Love is the most twisted curse of them all.
You open your eyes and look up at him worriedly. The thought of not being able to see those e/c eyes of yours has Gojo feeling trepidation. Finally, he admits, "I.. love you, Y/n. That's what's wrong."
Because now that he knows that he does, it means he has to let you go. 
And as you see fear in those powerful cerulean eyes of his for the first time.. you knew it too.
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Thinking about Bakugo who secretly still looks after you even though it has been months since you two broke up. He would be jumping from one high rise to another, his crimson gaze sweeping the crowds as he makes sure you get to work or home safely.
Bakugo who sits in the same fucking table where you two used to grabbed lunches hoping you'd walk in again one day. You never did though.
Bakugo who still has your favorite mug in his cupboard, your old ratty quilt in his couch, your shampoo and body wash in his shower.. thinking, hoping, that if he doesn't change anything then it would mean that this fucking hell was just a damn time off.
Time off from all the senseless fighting, screaming matches, slamming doors and cursing one another.
But then, Bakugo sees how you're doing so much better. Smiling genuinely these days, going out and doing all the things you love and once begged him to come try with you.
And he slowly realizes that it was him all along. The reason why things fell apart.
He knew you loved him, never thought once that he'd lose you. Even now, he still believed you'd come right back. But now he realizes, maybe you wouldn't.
And he has no one else to blame but himself.
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Thinking about Bakugo who secretly still looks after you even though it has been months since you two broke up. He would be jumping from one high rise to another, his crimson gaze sweeping the crowds as he makes sure you get to work or home safely.
Bakugo who sits in the same fucking table where you two used to grabbed lunches hoping you'd walk in again one day. You never did though.
Bakugo who still has your favorite mug in his cupboard, your old ratty quilt in his couch, your shampoo and body wash in his shower.. thinking, hoping, that if doesn't change anything then it would mean that this fucking hell was just a damn time off.
Time off from all the senseless fighting, screaming matches, slamming doors and cursing one another.
But then, Bakugo sees how you're doing so much better. Smiling genuinely these days, going out and doing all the things you love and once begged him to come try with you.
And he slowly realizes that it was him all along. The reason why things fell apart.
He knew you loved him, never thought once that he'd lose you. Even now, he still believed you'd come right back. But now he realizes, maybe you wouldn't.
And he has no one else to blame but himself.
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practice makes perfect/sudden realisation
bonus art:
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And his pretty boyfriend*
Urg pretty bkg
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And his boyfriend
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OC: "Smile, Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight! Let's get that gremlin ass up in the charts, shall we?"
Bakugo: *grits teeth, smiles* Whatever. C'mere.
OC: *pretends not to be flustered* *is hyperaware of his hand placement* *screams internally*
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Writing for him currently 🥹🤍
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Bakugo Katsuki x reader, angst
Warning: mentions of mc death, pregnancy
"Bakugo-san.. I'm truly sorry but we need you to do skin to skin with the baby. If you could follow me, please."
Katsuki's blank stare drifts from your cold limp hand that he held in his, to one of the nurses waiting on him. He blinks once, twice, taking in a deep staggering breath and trying to make sense of what is happening.
Right now, he may just have lost the love of his life. You're right here, in front of him. He's holding your hand for fucks sake. But also, not really.
He was forced to let go of you as the doctors and other personnel in the delivery room desperately try to save you. Pushing shit into your IV line, taking turns restarting your heart and manually forcing it to beat until it hopefully starts beating on its own.
But Katsuki has seen this scene play out before from the numbers of colleagues and civilians he witnessed being on the brink of death.
In the beginning, he used to hold hope. That their eyes would open or they would come gasping for air after all the efforts to resuscitate them. But 9 times out of 10, he watches the forlorn look on the faces of the people trying to save them as they put a white linen over their faces in defeat.
And Katsuki can feel it in his bones that.. you're gone. That you are not coming back. It should have made sense. How perfectly blissful the past year of your marriage had been. How it seemed too good to be true; to be on the top of his fucking game and to be able come home to you every single day. How utterly happenstance that in the same year of being hailed the top hero of his generation did he get the news that you're also pregnant. With his dream baby boy.
Bakugo should have known something bad was bound to happen. That something was bound to take his happiness away.
What kills him is that there was nothing he can do to fucking save you. Not with all his might, not with all the damn training he had gone through, not with all the successful rescues he has under his belt. This was beyond his power. All he could do was watch helplessly on the side, praying to whatever god was willing to listen to his pleas that he now knows had fallen to deaf ears as the doctor takes the paddles from your chest and meets his gaze in resignation.
"Time of death.." the doctor calls and Bakugo takes your hand again and keeps his gaze on it, not having it in him to look at your beautiful face knowing you're not really there anymore. No. He refuses to see you like this.
Instead, Bakugo closes his eyes. Remembering how you were just moments ago. Smiling despite the labor pains. Laughing despite the contractions and telling him, "I sure hope he takes after you so it's all worth it. I hope he gets your eyes. So that if he turns out to be a brat, I would not have the heart to stay mad at him for too long."
"Bakugo-san?" That one nurse asked for him again and all Bakugo could think was, could he do it? Hold his son?
Can Bakugo love him? Despite the fact that he just lost the love of his life over him, someone he has never met.
Bakugo swallows the lump that has formed in his throat.
Can he do it?
It took everything in him to let go of your hand and follow aimlessly to the ward. He was instructed to sit on the chair and from his periphery, he can see the kid in the light blue swaddle that you picked out.
His brows furrowed as he unbuttons his dress shirt. The nurse eases the baby in his arms and Bakugo grits his teeth as his little cheek squished against his bare chest.
Bakugo may have been in shock because despite the tremendous grief he feels, he's not crying or screaming his heart out or destroying everything in sight. But.. When the baby coos in his arms and wiggles in the swaddle to free his little hand, Bakugo's heart seems to jumpstart back to life. Because just as Bakugo reaches for his little hand to tuck it back in the swaddle, he wraps his hand on Bakugo's index finger and opens his little eyes.
And his eyes were exactly like yours. Your e/c ones that he thought he would never see again after you closed yours forever.
Bakugo's brows shoot up in realization that he was dead wrong. That he loves his son more than anything. That his son is the living, breathing piece of you that he gets to keep. That he would do anything to protect and keep him happy and healthy.
Bakugo smiles as his son looks up at him, glad that the gods didn't listen to you when you wished for your son to take after him.
In another life, maybe he would get to keep you both. But for now, he'll take what he can get. And despite losing you, his main reason for living, at least his son was alive and well. And your little 'Kazuki' as you used to fondly call him when he was still in your belly, should be reason enough to keep Bakugo going.
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Bakugo Katsuki x reader, angst
Warning: mentions of mc death, pregnancy
"Bakugo-san.. I'm truly sorry but we need you to do skin to skin with the baby. If you could follow me, please."
Katsuki's blank stare drifts from your cold limp hand that he held in his, to one of the nurses waiting on him. He blinks once, twice, taking in a deep staggering breath and trying to make sense of what is happening.
Right now, he may just have lost the love of his life. You're right here, in front of him. He's holding your hand for fucks sake. But also, not really.
He was forced to let go of you as the doctors and other personnel in the delivery room desperately try to save you. Pushing shit into your IV line, taking turns restarting your heart and manually forcing it to beat until it hopefully starts beating on its own.
But Katsuki has seen this scene play out before from the numbers of colleagues and civilians he witnessed being on the brink of death.
In the beginning, he used to hold hope. That their eyes would open or they would come gasping for air after all the efforts to resuscitate them. But 9 times out of 10, he watches the forlorn look on the faces of the people trying to save them as they put a white linen over their faces in defeat.
And Katsuki can feel it in his bones that.. you're gone. That you are not coming back. It should have made sense. How perfectly blissful the past year of your marriage had been. How it seemed too good to be true; to be on the top of his fucking game and to be able come home to you every single day. How utterly happenstance that in the same year of being hailed the top hero of his generation did he get the news that you're also pregnant. With his dream baby boy.
Bakugo should have known something bad was bound to happen. That something was bound to take his happiness away.
What kills him is that there was nothing he can do to fucking save you. Not with all his might, not with all the damn training he had gone through, not with all the successful rescues he has under his belt. This was beyond his power. All he could do was watch helplessly on the side, praying to whatever god was willing to listen to his pleas that he now knows had fallen to deaf ears as the doctor takes the paddles from your chest and meets his gaze in resignation.
"Time of death.." the doctor calls and Bakugo takes your hand again and keeps his gaze on it, not having it in him to look at your beautiful face knowing you're not really there anymore. No. He refuses to see you like this.
Instead, Bakugo closes his eyes. Remembering how you were just moments ago. Smiling despite the labor pains. Laughing despite the contractions and telling him, "I sure hope he takes after you so it's all worth it. I hope he gets your eyes. So that if he turns out to be a brat, I would not have the heart to stay mad at him for too long."
"Bakugo-san?" That one nurse asked for him again and all Bakugo could think was, could he do it? Hold his son?
Can Bakugo love him? Despite the fact that he just lost the love of his life over him, someone he has never met.
Bakugo swallows the lump that has formed in his throat.
Can he do it?
It took everything in him to let go of your hand and follow aimlessly to the ward. He was instructed to sit on the chair and from his periphery, he can see the kid in the light blue swaddle that you picked out.
His brows furrowed as he unbuttons his dress shirt. The nurse eases the baby in his arms and Bakugo grits his teeth as his little cheek squished against his bare chest.
Bakugo may have been in shock because despite the tremendous grief he feels, he's not crying or screaming his heart out or destroying everything in sight. But.. When the baby coos in his arms and wiggles in the swaddle to free his little hand, Bakugo's heart seems to jumpstart back to life. Because just as Bakugo reaches for his little hand to tuck it back in the swaddle, he wraps his hand on Bakugo's index finger and opens his little eyes.
And his eyes were exactly like yours. Your e/c ones that he thought he would never see again after you closed yours forever.
Bakugo's brows shoot up in realization that he was dead wrong. That he loves his son more than anything. That his son is the living, breathing piece of you that he gets to keep. That he would do anything to protect and keep him happy and healthy.
Bakugo smiles as his son looks up at him, glad that the gods didn't listen to you when you wished for your son to take after him.
In another life, maybe he would get to keep you both. But for now, he'll take what he can get. And despite losing you, his main reason for living, at least his son was alive and well. And your little 'Kazuki' as you used to fondly call him when he was still in your belly, should be reason enough to keep Bakugo going.
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Enji Todoroki × Reader, angst
Inspired by this Enji 🫠 Warnings: implied smut
The tips of your fingers are cold and numb. Stark contrast of the scalding ache in your chest that radiates through your entire being, bringing tears in your e/c eyes. Your tearful gaze flickers from the fancy invitation in front of you to the silhouette of the man that's been the bane of your existence since you have realized you have fallen for him.
Enji throws you a glance over his shoulder as he redresses. For a second, you thought you saw remorse flash through those devastatingly breathtaking ocean eyes.
"I don't expect you to come," he says, averting his gaze as his thick fingers work the buttons of his dress shirt. The same one he wore this morning to ask the hand of the woman he intends to marry. "But I figure it'd be far worse not to at least let you know."
You were quick to mask your despair with a well practiced smirk. "How considerate of you." You chide, your tone betraying your facade. You fill the following silence with the clicking of the lighter as you set a cigarette ablaze.
Now fully dressed, Enji walks around your bed to sit across from you by the window ledge. He reaches and touches your face, memorizing your beautiful features illuminated by the Musutafu city night lights knowing this will be the last time he'll see you. Like this, at least. With skin in technicolor from the works of his hands and mouth, hair a mess from being under his grasp and from rounds of being tossed around in bed, soft kiss bruised lips that he almost always wounds by biting a little too hard.
He glares at the cigarette between them and asks, "I thought you quit smoking?" He takes the thing from between your lips and you frown as you watch him put it out with his bare hand. "I did." You shrug. "I guess I just can't live without at least one bad thing in my life."
The both of you take a deep breath at the exact same time.
"So I take it this is goodbye, then?" You ask as you look out the window, already knowing the answer.
"I am a lot of things, but I will not add disloyal to my long list of flaws." He mutters. You smile wryly, keeping your eyes on the cars passing below your apartment building. You feel pathetic as you realize you're even considering being a fucking mistress if that meant getting to keep him in your life.
"Was there ever a chance? For you and I?" You couldn't help but ask. Thinking about how in the span of time you spent together, didn't you ever stand a chance in his heart? Despite giving this fucked up arrangement with him your all?
The question had Enji clenching his jaw. He long accepted that his heart is close to nonexistent. All he ever is to him is ambition and greed. But as he stares at you, for a split second, he almost wants to reconsider everything.
You startle when he suddenly pulls you to him, sitting you in his lap and kissing you hard. Salty tears slip past your lips and his, Enji couldn't tell whose it was. Your hands card through his crimson hair in a desperate attempt to keep him in your grasp, reveling in how his big rough hands seem to hold you with the same desperation. Kneading and pulling you bruisingly tight against his body.
But then, he pulls away, leaning his forehead against yours. And you knew your answer when you looked at him. When you saw his eyes squeezed shut, lips pressed into a thin line, nostrils flared as he pushed air down his lungs. He does love you, whether he admits it or not, it's just.. not enough. And it never will be. You never will.
"You are.. despicable." You whisper. "But I already knew that and chose to love you anyway." A sigh of defeat escapes you as you now look at him with pity.
"I hope you know that this marriage, the children you will bear with this innocent woman.. it would not result in you attaining this 'dream' of yours. You're going to put everyone in misery. And I refuse to be one of those people. Not anymore."
"Goodbye, Enji." You murmur as you crawl back in bed with your back against him. The moment you hear the door click close softly as he left, you sob against your pillow that still smells of him.
You probably cursed him the day he broke your heart completely, Enji thinks to himself as he stares at the protesting crowd outside the central hospital. He was still foggy with anesthetics but the ache in his heart was sharp and it brought him to tears.
You were right. You've always been.
And now that he's faced with the repercussions of the poor decisions he has made in the past, he could not help but wonder what if he just gave up on his selfish endeavors and accepted that fact that he can and could have been happy with you.
Sparing Rei, Fuyumi, Touya, Natsuo and Shoto from all this hell he brought to them.
If only he was smart enough then to realize then that maybe, you were all he needed.
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