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animusicnerd · 1 month

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Mortals and Fools — First Look #1 (Coming Soon)

Want to read a SFW coming-of-age fantasy novel with evil gods, two adult aspec protagonists and magic? Consider supporting this project!

Author's Note: After a total of 8 years of posting fanfiction on this account, I am excited to announce that I am finally starting my first long-term original work as an author! Goal is to get this series published as an actual novel but until then, I will be uploading chapters online as I write them, hopefully building an audience in the process! Mortals and Fools will be available on Wattpad and potentially other platforms. The first 4 chapters will be uploaded to Tumblr as well. Over the next few weeks I will keep uploading promo posts with new characters and more info! Thank you so much to everyone who has supported me as a writer over the years and welcome to everyone who's new here!

Summary: In the land of Elsthess, brilliant but arrogant Dr. Immanuel Faust is doing his best to follow the teachings of the Goddess of Wisdom, live up to his late grandmother's expectations and hide the fact that he has been seeing strange, mystical apparitions all his life. When his pupil becomes afflicted with an ancient curse and the things he has seen turn out to be more than just hallucinations, Immanuel must forge a contract with Morgan, a being from another realm who's ready to humble him at every turn, and learn his religion's most despised art: magic. As he steps outside of the simple world he has grown up in, he slowly comes to realize that there is much more to learn for him still.

Themes:

The Meaning of Wisdom & Growth

Unlearning harmful narratives and prejudices

Religious Trauma

Healing from Abuse

Rebuilding trust in others

Learning to understand others

Navigating radical changes during adulthood

Elitism and class inequality

The problems with the ideal of meritocracy

Queerplatonic & Alterous Attraction

Addiction

Gender Dysphoria

What this story contains:

A variety of fun magical powers!

Evil Gods & Forces from other Realms!

Queer rep! (demisexual & aroace protagonists, a trans man and a wlw couple)

Mysteries to unravel

The coming-of-age fantasy adventures you're used to from YA novels but with characters in their 20s and struggles of adulthood

Humor

My blood, sweat and tears as an author

The Cast: Introducing 3 Characters

Here's some info on the three characters in the header, from left to right!

#1 — Dr. Immanuel Icarus Faust

❝ It wasn't supposed to be like this... I've failed... as both a doctor and a man of faith. I wanted to follow your teachings, dear Goddess, and guide those who seek wisdom and knowledge, as grandmother did... but I couldn't even save one innocent girl. Have I become godless? ❝

Raised by his grandmother, the High Priestess of Solbrynn's temple, Immanuel was taught from an early age on to aspire to be the best in everything he attempted to do and dedicate his life to wisdom, in order to make the Goddess Adira proud. Having become a renowned physician at the age of 28, Immanuel understands himself as his kingdom's ideal of a self-made man: a scholar who can achieve everything he puts his mind to, no matter the circumstances. As a result, he has put himself on a pedestal, believing that those who achieved less than him had all the chances and merely didn't use them. Fearing nothing more than failure and becoming anything like his absent, alcoholic father; Immanuel is bound for a rude awakening.

#2 — Morgan Miralaith

❝ While you were having your existential crisis in the mad scientist laboratory you call your bedroom, I took the liberty to read your grandmother's diary. The good news is, I finally understand where all the hubris comes from. ❝

Morgan, belonging to a long-lived species from the realm of Calliah, is the second-in-command for the Elsthess Resistance against the Plague Avatars. While the Resistance on Mhorunn regards her as a capable leader and a skilled fighter; using fire magic to blaze her way to victory; it is clear to most that she has many secrets and ulterior motives. She cares about others in her own way, yet hardly lets anyone close to her. With her mischievous demeanor and cynical nature, Morgan has made it her new mission to recruit Immanuel for the Resistance and, while at it, shatter his very distorted self-image and worldview. Upon forging a contract with her, Immanuel believes that he has sold his soul to a demon. It is only upon meeting others of her kind that he realizes that really is just her personality.

#3 — Mortis Grimm

❞ People reject that which is foreign to them. You of all people should know this. Still, my personal aspirations and origins are of no concern to you. Remember that. ❝

While there are several people from the Realm of Calliah in Elsthess, the realm that Mortis Grimm originated from is unknown. He seems to be the only one of his kind and there is something sinister about him. Wielding powerful magic that matches no other in recorded nature, Mortis, despite being the leader of the Resistance, is a big mystery to all of its members. Usually donning a Plague Doctor mask, Morgan is among the few to have seen his face. He is Mhorunn's greatest ally, but hardly a trusted one. Most understand that he could just as well become its greatest enemy one day.

Interested in reading more and receiving updates as they're posted? Comment on this post and tell me if you'd like to be added to the taglist! Reblogs are appreciated to spread the word! 💞

Taglist — @gwaaaaar @silveryloneliness @noxochicoztliv @justletmeon12 @averytirednerd @letsallsleepoverwork @styrofauxm @non-pressurizeddiamond @mangoinacan13 @amateurmasksmith @kenobiblue @soru-dee @pictures-of-the-stars @elf-osamu @animusicnerd

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animusicnerd · 2 months

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Since it's Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week I want to thank the aro community for everything they taught me and everything they did for me even before I started to identify as frayromantic. I had so much amatonormativity to unlearn before I could arrive at this point, so this is my first aro week, but identifying as ace for years, I inevitably met a lot of aros online and saw a lot of aro positivity posts.

Truth be told, from age 14 - 19 I suffered a period of debilitating, very traumatizing emotional abuse that killed my entire social life and my abuser would make sure i couldn't form these bonds when i wanted to. As soon as I got out of that -> covid lockdown. When the pandemic restrictions were lifted I've spent 7 years at that point pretty much socially isolated aside from online contacts. And in the past 3 years I've been busy healing, studying, adulting and picking up the pieces.

It's been almost a decade now in which I didn't have a stable social life (aside from my relatives) and everyone else has always looked at me with this... weird pity for it. I had a lot of anxiety due to being ace as well; because i didn't feel like i could find that close committed relationship i wanted without engaging in sexual activity. People imagined the past decade in my life as me sitting on the couch all day wallowing in self-pity and loneliness, which honestly does such a disservice to all the places I visited, the ways in which i've grown, the art i made and the changes i made. People treated me like I had wasted 10 years of my life and constantly put pressure on me to be more social, to put myself into situations i wasn't comfortable with or to at least get a partner so I won't have to die alone. Dying alone was this terrible horror concept that was pushed onto me as my inevitable fate if i didn't get my shit together. And for the longest time I believed that. I hardly struggled with loneliness, I struggled with this internalized idea that I had failed at life - that i am a failure - if i don't have this many irl friends or a partner.

The aro community was THE FIRST SPACE that helped me dismantle this perspective of seeing the relationships in my life as an extension of myself. The first space that taught me that relationships of any kind aren't these things i have to collect to prove I've led a successful life. The first community that turned around and said "You are whole as you are. You are enough. And you don't need anyone else to complete you." And hearing that, to me, was such a wake-up call; it was such a novelty-realization in contrast to all the bullshit i had internalized, that I cried because damn, this was what I needed to hear.

Suddenly the value of my life wasn't defined by the kind of relationships and how many relationships I filled it with. Suddenly I realized that the committed relationship I wanted didn't have to be romantic (or sexual for that matter); hell, I didn't even want it to be. Suddenly I realized the biggest obstacle to enjoying life for me was all the people who told me i wasn't enjoying my life properly. The aro community taught me so much about love, self-worth and independence. And I haven't been active here for long but everyone has been so kind.

The aro community gave me all the hope and positivity that i needed to focus on myself and my life. I still want to form meaningful irl friendships and get a QPR in the future but the pressure is gone to get all of that asap or else my time on this earth is wasted. I have faith that these things will come when I'm ready and when it's the right time and even if they don't, it's not going to be the end of the world. My value as a person and the success of my life is not defined by the people in it and it never will be. Nor will yours. Nor will anyone's.

Some of y'all might be out here asking yourselves "I'm not aro, what does the aromantic community concern me?" So much. Amatonormativity and relationship hierarchy go so much deeper than just the assumption that everyone desires romantic love. The aromantic community can teach us so much and help us unlearn so many things that are ingrained into our system and into our way of thinking. We should be unlearning those things because doing so will take pressure away from all of us, no matter how we identify. The aromantic community should concern you because they're people with their own hopes and dreams who deserve to find happiness in whatever way feels right for them without the world constantly telling them they're doing it wrong.

The aromantic community has made me a more understanding, hopeful, positive and independent person and I can't thank them enough for that. Happy Aromantic Spectrum Awareness Week.

🧡💛🤍🩵💙

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animusicnerd · 2 months

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I want to know the secret of shadow

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animusicnerd · 2 months

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glasses

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animusicnerd · 2 months

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doodle

Alastor has a rich expression, which is nice

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animusicnerd · 2 months

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Let’s Talk About Love

Shall We Date?: Obey Me! One Master To Rule Them All!

Summary: Levi doesn’t understand why you keep choosing him over his brothers time and time again. He can’t offer you the same things that they would be able to offer you.

Word Count: 2174 ✯ AO3 Version

Characters: Aromantic! Asexual! Leviathan x Aromantic! Asexual! GN! Reader

Tags: Fluff, aroace reader x aroace character, discussions of aromanticism, discussions of queer platonic relationships, autistic-coded Levi

Jealousy was an emotion that Leviathan spent the whole of his existence being intimately familiar with. Such a thing is no surprise, really - he transformed into the Avatar of Envy after his fall from heaven, afterall. Envy was a black, ugly feeling that he lived with too closely anytime he didn't drown himself in his manga, anime, or games to escape from it.

Inferiority was another emotion he knew just as well, even if he experienced it less often, since he shut himself away in his room most everyday so that he wouldn't have to deal with the overwhelming weight of all he was lacking that came with inferiority. That and so he wouldn't have to deal with his social anxiety, too.

Inferiority was, unfortunately, something he was feeling way too much lately, ever since you have come to the Devildom and wormed your way into his family’s life. Watching his brothers all fawn over you around the breakfast table, the inferiority was especially oppressive today. Each of them had a different approach to you, but he knew that each one of them was in love with you.

Mammon was the most obvious about his being in love with you with how he constantly tried to get your attention and monopolize your time, even if he wasn’t entirely honest about his feelings. Satan was slightly more devious about it, covering up his shyness over outright saying his feelings by straight-forward actions, flirting with you and asking you out on dates. Belphegor was territorial and possessive of you, easily upset when your thoughts and time weren’t devoted to him, wanting to monopolize you in a way that was much less wholesome than how Mammon desired to monopolize your time.

Levi sincerely hopes that his younger brother was not a yandere, like the kinds he sometimes saw in his manga and anime. For your safety as well as the safety of the rest of them.

Asmodeus flirted with you just as he flirted with every person he found attractive, but Levi knows that Asmo’s love for you was genuine in that you were the only person allowed to see the true insecurities lying under the air-headed facade Asmo maintained. Lucifer desired you just as Asmo desired you, openly fond of you when he thought no one else was watching, being severely strict upon you to try and maintain the idea that he had no favoritism towards you when he thought people were watching. Beelzebub - well, Levi actually wasn’t sure that Beel experienced love or desire for anything that wasn’t food. But he did know that it definitely meant something that his younger brother willingly shared food with you and cooked for you.

As soon as Lucifer dismissed them from the breakfast table, Levi made a beeline for his room, itching to bury himself under a blanket to try and not thinking about the whirlwind of barbed thoughts running through his mind right now.

Leviathan himself, well...he is fairly sure that he does love you too, in some capacity. He knows for a fact that he cares for you deeply, that he’s fond of you, and that he finds himself wanting to share his special interests with you - but he’s also aware, somewhere in the back of his mind, that the way he feels about you is not the same way that his brothers feel about you. He’s painfully conscious of the fact that even when these tangle of emotions confuse him when he thinks on them too long that he’s not, not in love with you. At least, not like how Satan and Mammon are in love with you. And he doesn’t desire you either, not the way that Lucifer and Asmodeus desire you.

The inferiority that overcomes him whenever he acknowledges these thoughts, these feelings, that he can’t offer to you what his brothers can, yet selfishly desiring to spend every waking moment he could just enjoying your company...it makes him want to just curl up under his blankets, blocking out all the lights of his room, their lights brighter than usual in his heightened emotional distress, blocking out all the buzzing of his electronics with his headphones, just blocking out the world entirely, trying to block out his mind at the same time.

Why - despite his brothers constantly vying for your time, attention, and affections - do you continue to keep choosing him out of all them to spend all your time with?

“Levi? Are you in there?” you called from outside his bedroom door with a knock, “I wanted to watch the new TSL DVD with you, if you were still up for that?”

Levi groggily unfurled himself from his blanket nest, squinting at the brightness of his phone, faintly surprised that he had basically let himself pass the whole day away hiding under his blankets.

“I can go if you aren’t feeling well…”

Rubbing at his eyes, Levi pulled himself out of his tub-bed with a grimace, striding over and opening the door for you, before turning back and disappearing back into his room so he wouldn’t have to deal with the brightness of the hall lights, “I’ll set up the movie once I find it. You can set up the pillows.”

Entering his room, you were caught over by the big nest of blankets all heaped in the tub-bed already, and looking over at Leviathan, you could see his tail sticking out from the one blanket that was still wrapped about him like a hood, his tail flicking up and down rapidly. Levi was obviously really upset about something.

Pursing your lips, contemplating if you should just straight up give him a hug, or ask him what was wrong first, then give him the hug, you picked out the pillows that you know were Levi’s favorites and arranged the tub-bed to be as comfy as possible. Nodding in satisfaction, you turned to see Levi still rummaging through his stack of DVDs, head drooped and tail still flicking with irritation. He seemed as though he was lost in thought.

“Levi? Are you okay?”

He startled, dropping the DVDs he was holding and tipping over the whole stack. Feeling positively horrible that you startled him like that, you quickly rushed over to help him pick up the fallen DVDs.

“I’m fine, I’m just really tired,” he mumbled as he avoided eye-contact, picking up DVD after DVD quickly.

You sighed softly, gently putting a hand on his arm and stopping him, “You’re in your demon form, Levi. You morph into your demon form whenever you’re upset. ...can I give you a hug?”

He hesitated for a moment before he nodded, putting aside the DVDs onto his desk. You wrapped him up in a huge hug, patting his back gently, and Levi found himself relaxing into your tender embrace, resting his cheek against your head, exhaling long and slow. He already felt loads better.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No, it’s...it’s fine. It’s...silly. I don’t want to bother you with - “

You squeezed him gently, tightening your arms around him, “Levi. You are never a bother to me. And your feelings are never, ever ‘silly.’ Okay? Your feelings are important, just like how you’re important. Okay? Now, talk to me, Levi. What’s wrong? Why’re you upset?”

Levi trembled at the utter anxiety clogging his throat up at just the mere thought of trying to express what he was feeling out loud, hiding his face in your hair as he held you close, “It’s..it’s, um…”

“You can take all the time you need,” you quietly encouraged him, rubbing a comforting hand up and down his back.

Shakily taking a breath, he tried again, “I, um...All my brothers...they’re in love with you. But I...I don’t love you. Ah, but that’s - ! That’s not - ! It’s, that’s, what I meant, is that, I don’t...I don’t love you the same way they do. I...I can't give you the same kind of love they would, so I don’t - I don’t understand why you...why keep choosing to spend all your time with...with someone like me…”

You stood quietly, letting his words wash over you as you processed what he was telling you. Pulling away from the hug with careful movements, you looked up at Levi to see he had his eyes anxiously squeezed shut, likely afraid of what your reaction would be to his words.

“Levi, look at me. Please,” you asked him, keeping your voice hushed, knowing how he became hyper sensitive when his emotions were high strung.

He hesitantly opened his eyes, looking down at you, heart near stopping at how you were looking at him with such...utter understanding.

You took his hands and sat him down in the nest of pillows and blankets you had set up in his tub-bed, plopping down next him.

“I keep choosing you to spend all my time with because I like you, Levi.”

Levi sat straight up, struggling against sinking into all the pillows, “But - !”

“I’m not interest in what your brothers have to offer me, either.”

“But I - “

You turned to look up at him, avoiding eye contact so that you wouldn’t make him uncomfortable with how distraught he already was, “I don’t return any of their feelings. And I don’t expect you to feel any differently for me than you already do. Have you aromanticism, Levi?”

He blinked, caught off guard by the question Levi shook his head.

“Aromanticism is when a person very rarely, or never, feels romantic attraction.”

Levi gaped at you, “That’s - that’s a real thing?!”

“It is,” you nodded, smiling fondly at him, “There’s an entire spectrum, for all the different ways a person experiences aromanticism.”

Levi slumped back into the pillows and blankets, sinking into them as he stared at the ceiling in wonderment, mulling over what you had just told him. He sat up suddenly, struggling to not sit back into the bed again,

“Wait! Are you aromantic?”

You nodded, smiling at him all the same, “Yeah. I am. I’m asexual too. Asexuality means that you rarely or never feel sexual attraction. There’s a whole spectrum to how people experience asexuality too.”

Leviathan stared at you, utterly wowed, trying to figure out how to say what he was feeling, inhaling sharply, “I - I think I might be aromantic and, and asexual…”

You grinned as you pulled him into another big hug and he returned the hug, and Levi found himself grinning too as he returned the hug, his tail rapidly thumping against the pillows all around the both of you, but this time it was because he was excited to learn this new thing you just told him about.

“...there’s nothing wrong with me,” Leviathan murmured, finally allowing himself to sink back into the pillows and blankets and stay there.

“There was nothing wrong with you to begin with,” you agree, sinking into the pillows and blankets beside him, feeling comfortable and safe in his arms.

“...but you know, I...I feel really deeply for you, but I do know that I don’t want to like, be your boyfriend or anything, but I, I do want to spend like - agh, I’m not making any sense, am I…?” he huffed, hiding his face into the pillows, frustrated with himself.

“No, I get it,” you reassured him, poking at him to try and get him to stop hiding, “Do you know what a queer platonic relationship is?”

Levi peeked up at you, face adorably scrunched up in confusion, “Huh? A what?”

“I’m guessing not,” you giggled, cuddling up close, “Let’s see...a QPR is something more intense than friendship, but isn’t exactly romantic. The lines between platonic feelings and romantic feelings can be blurred and it can be hard for both people involved to really understand how they feel about each other fully. They can include friendships and ambiguously-romantic relationships that go beyond friendship norms in emotional intensity, physical affection, or other areas. Some QPR partners get married. A QPR can look different for everyone, depending on what the people involved are comfortable with and how they feel for each other.”

Levi mouthed out a “wow,” thinking this over, “So what I feel…”

You squished his cheeks together playfully, giggling, “I understand what you feel entirely. In fact, I feel the same. You just learned a lot in a few minutes, but...I really like you, Levi. Would you want to be my queer platonic partner?”

He gaped at you, before laughing excitedly, nodding and pulling you into an even tighter hug, positively delighted. You returned the hug just as happily, resting your head on his shoulder. The two of you pulled back to smile at each other, the world feeling perfectly in balance at this new decision that the two of you made together.

That evening, the two of you thoroughly enjoyed the new TSL DVD together, cuddling under the light of the movie that played on Levi’s large flat screen television.

Likes and reblogs are loved and appreciated!

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animusicnerd · 3 months

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✨️

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animusicnerd · 4 months

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Hi! I heard about you from Ry-Ry’s recommendations! I’ve read some of your stuff and it seems really amazing! I’d like to have a piece of your work!

Could I have a Malleus and reader just watching the starry night skies, but Malleus is watching the stars in the reader’s eyes? I love him sm 💕💕 if not, completely understand! Don’t worry!

I’ll be reading your future posts! You have my support! 💕💕💕💕💕

(Main blog is @minimallyminnie, not this one by the way, in case I ever tag you in anything)

Stargazing (Malleus x Reader)

(A/N): I’m sorry it took so long to get to your request! I’m glad you like my writing!!! 🥰 Thank you for your support and mutual love for Malleus! I love him just as much, and your request inspired me greatly! I hope you enjoy!!

Reader is implied to be the player character/the prefect. Reader is written as someone who hasn’t had the chance to see the stars before.

“I must confess, sometimes I miss being able to see the stars while here at Night Raven College. As nocturnal fae make up the majority of the castle staff, there is little need for the halls to be lit at night. I often had a clear view of the stars from my bedroom window, when it wasn’t storming or cloudy.”

Malleus’s eyes were fixed on the sky above as you sat side by side on Ramshackle’s porch, your eyes fixed on his face as he spoke, hands just shy of touching each other. The two of you were weakly illuminated by the dim porch light, awake far beyond curfew. Malleus’s visits were always worth the cost of your sleep, in your opinion, though.

Tonight, he seemed wistful as he looked up at the sky.

“Do you feel homesick, when you look up at the sky?”

He smiles, a gentle tug of lips that you wouldn’t have noticed if you weren’t so focused on him.

“At times.” His eyes shift from the night sky as his head turns to meet your gaze. “Do you?”

You shake your head, thoughts scattering for a moment as he intertwines his fingers with yours.

“No. Even in another world, the sky is the same no matter where I go. It’s comforting, in a way, to be honest. But…”

Now you were the one looking up at the sky, cloudless and dark, faintly illuminated by the school building in the distance.

“I’ve never really had the chance to see the stars, actually. I’ve always lived in places with too many lights to see them.”

His lips parted for a moment as he blinked, his eyes turning to follow yours to look at the school building as he turned over that confession in his mind.

“I suppose as a diurnal species, the constant need for light during the night means that you cannot see the stars as you please.”

You nod, pulling your fingers from his just a bit to idly play with his hand.

“It’s kinda a shame, honestly. I guess it can’t be helped, but…I’d love to be able to see them one day.” You slot your hands back together, eyes glancing up to meet his for a moment before glancing away again just as quickly. “Especially the view in Briar Valley.”

Malleus gives your hand a gentle squeeze, his eyes seeming to glow as he gives you another smile. “You need only say when.”

The two of you lapsed into a content silence, pressing shoulder to shoulder as you both returned to looking up at the blank night sky, your joined hands a warm anchor in this dream-like bubble.

“Hm…would you join me, to some place further than our usual walk?” You look up at him, question dying on your tongue when faced with Malleus leaning into your space much closer than was good for your heart, his eyes aglow with excitement. “I know of a place here, with a clear view of the stars. I can take us right now, if you’d like.”

You had to take a moment to swallow, struggling to remember how to turn your thoughts into coherent speech. In the end, you can only manage a nod, ready to to stand, when Malleus grins and withdraws his hand from yours to quickly wrap his arm around your waist, tugging you close into his side. His murmuring into your ear to close your eyes is the only warning you get before his magic flashes and you feel weightless, Malleus’s arms around you the only support you have. You slowly open your eyes tentatively when you feel his feet settle on the ground just as the smell of the ocean hits your nose, and you can’t help the gasp that escapes you as you take in the sight before you.

“It’s beautiful, Malleus!” you whisper, leaning against him in your attempt to take in everything. To talk any louder would feel as though it would shatter this private moment with him.

Before you lay a blanket of stars, brightly indistinct like fluffy clouds of blue and purple, white and pink. They were so brilliantly plentiful that they were as though a master painter had created his magnum opus, a painting that one would never tire of looking at. You had no idea the night sky could be so colorful, or that the ocean waves and sandy shore could glitter like this under the glow of the moon and stars.

“It is,” he agreed, but his response came distractedly late. His eyes were much too focused on observing the stars that were reflected in your eyes as you looked up at them with open awe, a quiet smile on his face. He would have never thought he’d find a view he loved even more than looking up at the stars back home, before he met you.

“You saw skies like this all the time back home, huh?”

He hummed in another distracted response to your question. Curious to see if he was as in awe of the stars as you were, you turned your face to look at him, only to find his eyes already meeting yours. The surprise left you breathless.

“It’s a sight I’ll never tire of,” he says, the words so quiet that they would’ve been stolen by the sound of the waves cresting upon the shore if he hadn’t been holding you so close.

His eyes continued to remain fixed on yours.

Your lips part, an attempt to form a response, thoughts scattered and trying to not be further distracted by the way his eyes followed the movement of your lips.

“Can…” you hide your face against his shoulder, hiding from his tender gaze. “...can we come and watch the stars again soon? Just the two of us?”

The corners of his eyes crinkle in delight, nudging you with his shoulder to look up at him. As soon as you peeked at him, face warm with embarrassment, he took the opportunity to quickly press a kiss to your forehead.

“I’d love nothing more.”

(A/N): Once again, sorry it took so long! I hope you enjoyed it! :)

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animusicnerd · 4 months

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Lilia Vanrouge go brrrrr

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animusicnerd · 5 months

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The Lilia Pizza™

admins note: i highly advise you against cooking anything i put on this blog. this recipe was inspired by a pizza someone had at the workplace christmas party. it was not nearly this bad but the comical amount of rucola and parmesan was there.

Dear lovely followers,

I'm sorry it took me a while to post a new recipe but I had to stop the end of the world, relive my past traumas, the loss of my best friends, wake up from a horrible dream and berate my children.

Now that I am back, I would like to share with you this recipe that I came up with when I first explored the human world after the war 500 years ago. You see, pizza doesn't exist in Briar Valley so I was pleasantly surprised when I discovered this lovely delicacy for the first time. I was impressed by the sheer variety of pizza types and it inspired me to create my own: the Lilia Pizza™.

I have made this pizza for my children many times and it's one of their favorites! 😊

— Lilia

Ingredients:

pre-made pizza dough from your local grocery store

1 frozen pizza

tomato juice

1 lobster

black licorice

1 kg of rucola

1 kg of parmesan

3 bananas

bottle of vanilla extract

hot cheetos

eggs

Instructions:

Roll out the pizza dough. You can use a rolling pin for this or freestyle it.

Break the frozen pizza into small pieces and throw them into your mixer. Mix until it has the texture of a cold sauce. Apply pizza sauce to the pizza.

Pour the bottle of tomato juice onto the pizza.

Beat the lobster onto the windowsill multiple times, then roast over fireplace for 30 minutes.

Throw the lobster into the fireplace for a minute after roasting it. Make sure to put out the fire before covering the lobster with egg and hot cheeto crumbs and placing the little guy onto the pizza. Assemble him in a way that looks cute!

Melt the black licorice in a pot until it has sauce texture, then add bottle of vanilla extract (can omit the bottle)

Pour licorice mixture over the lobster.

Cut the bananas into slices and put them on the pizza (can omit the peel)

Put the pizza into the oven for an 45 minutes.

Once the pizza is done, throw the 1 kg of rucola and 1 kg of grated parmesan on top until the rest of the pizza is no longer visible. I find that arranging it like this helps hide the rest of the pizza as a surprise!

Enjoy!

Edit: wrong blog but follow @liliasrecipes for more!

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animusicnerd · 5 months

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Alright, dusting off the Nanami drafts now I can’t take it anymore

Not into jjk as much anymore but if I see another video or mention of Nanami dying, I will be posting a shit ton of fluff to combat it.

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animusicnerd · 5 months

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Not into jjk as much anymore but if I see another video or mention of Nanami dying, I will be posting a shit ton of fluff to combat it.

#jjk spoilers #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk nanami #he makes me blegh #I love him 😭

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animusicnerd · 6 months

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warning(s) pure angst, jjk chapter 120 SPOILERS

arguments with kento are always the worst.

you’ve learned over the years that you’d probably prefer it if he would just scream back when he’s mad rather than being dead silent.

because when he’s angry, he doesn’t speak. he just gives you space to cool off, then he always makes sure to kiss you before you sleep. a way to let you know he still loves you the same even if things are heated and that you can always talk it out with him.

you hate it because he always, always apologizes first even if it’s your fault sometimes, but you always appreciated his way of communicating. it’s as if he would rather take the jab every time than have you mad at him.

however, he couldn’t do so that day— october 31, 2018. he had to go to shibuya and left with tension between the two of you. you don’t even remember what exactly you argued about— all you recall was that it ended with you both saying something that could’ve easily passed as unforgivable, words specifically chosen to wound each other’s feelings.

and as per, kento gave you your space and left with you having the last word.

except you never got that good night’s kiss.

when news reached you, you didn’t even react. how could you? the last words you said to him was “then leave already,” with the coldest, meanest tone you’ve ever spoken to him in.

you just stared at the wall for what seemed like days. people were calling you non stop, but your phone was turned off. you hadn’t even left your shared bedroom. the comforter still had his scent on it and you’re afraid that it’ll disappear if you get up for even a minute and then his passing will feel real.

it wasn’t until ino stopped by to drop off his cellphone— one of the only traces he left that night— that you did something else besides laying down. you stared at kento’s lock screen, sitting at the dim dining room table.

his wallpaper was a photo of you. he took it while you were eating in the very place you’re sitting in right now and you begged him for days to delete it. he insisted that you looked pretty so you let him be. he’d always been like that, so stern with others but he had such a soft spot for you.

you knew his password because it was your anniversary date, then the messaging app opened as soon as you punched the numbers in. it’s your chat, the last conversation you had on there was him asking if you wanted to eat outside because he was free the next morning and you obliged. that was the night before you had an argument the next day and lunch plans were cancelled.

he had an unsent message— all typed out, but he never pressed the send button for some reason.

he was apologizing for hurting you.

he said that he knows it’s been tough for you these days and how he should’ve seen the signs sooner instead of thinking everything’s okay.

then he apologized again for not being able to kiss you goodnight, and for being a shitty husband that couldn’t tend to his wife’s needs.

the message concluded with “i miss you, my precious girl. make sure to eat and sleep well, i’ll make it up to you soon.”

kento’s death hadn’t hit your reality until those words on the screen registered in your mind. your dry, pale lips from barely drinking water trembled, eyes welled up in tears for the first time since you found out. so many different emotions crashed over you in such little time, your chest felt tight and you let go of his phone, clattering onto the wooden table.

“just leave already,” replayed in your mind over and over and the way his face turned pale from your harsh words. with how things turned out, it almost sounded like you were sending him on death’s row and it made you feel like you’re responsible somehow.

guilt loomed over you like a stormy cloud for making him feel like he wasn’t good enough for you and you wonder how different the future might’ve turned out if you’ve at least gave him a hug before he left.

if you could’ve just set your pride aside and kissed him goodbye like he does with you before you sleep.

and if he still loved you the same at his final moments.

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animusicnerd · 6 months

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A mini fic in Lyla’s P.O.V. from a scene in my “(Chapter 2) A Spin on an Enchanted Tale”

As you giggled and chatted with Gabriella before Lyla would take her to school, Lyla took in the exchange. She stood next to Miguel, the two of them a few feet away from you and Gabi.

“I like Y/N,” Lyla loudly whispered to Miguel, nudging his arm with her elbow. “They’re good with Gabi…and they could be good for you, too.”

Miguel’s head snapped towards Lyla, his thick eyebrows furrowing in confusion. “What do you mean by that?”

“You know exactly what I mean by that,” Lyla shot him a knowing look as she rested her hands on her hips.

Sure, Lyla had just met you only minutes ago, but she could tell you were a good person. While Miguel always told Lyla that he didn’t need a partner to raise Gabi and that he was perfectly fine with being a single parent, Lyla saw how being a single parent and running his own company took a toll on Miguel.

Most days Miguel barely slept, and Lyla didn’t miss the astonishing development that was the lack of eye bags under his eyes the moment she saw Miguel descend the staircase earlier.

Lyla couldn’t remember the last time she saw Miguel look so well-rested (maybe more than half a decade ago??) and something told her that this new development probably had something to do with a certain “princess.”

Maybe you could be good for Miguel, or maybe Lyla just liked being nosy about Miguel’s love life (or lack thereof).

Before Lyla could suggest to Miguel that he could try to get to know you better, she caught Miguel’s eyes fluttering shut in annoyance once he realized what she was getting at.

“Out,” Miguel gritted his teeth, though his word held no bite towards Lyla as he shooed her to the elevator.

She simply cracked a devilish smirk on her face as she made her way into the elevator and looked at Miguel and then at you.

Miguel pinched the bridge of his nose at Lyla’s suggestion. His eyes reopened, but instead of directing his gaze to Lyla, Miguel directed his gaze to you and Gabi.

You had said something that made Gabi adorably laugh, and Lyla didn’t miss the way the lines around Miguel’s eyes softened in the tiniest of ways.

Lyla couldn’t wait to see what would happen next.

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animusicnerd · 6 months

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soccerfamily!au Miguel and wife’s wedding?

It's Soccer Family week ~ ❤️✨

A little long, hope you like ~ c:

After Miguel proposed, there was a miriad of things that came over both. Gabi being seven months old, you looking for a dress, the both looking for a venue and so many details Miguel found annoying.

He was a simple man. If it was up to him, he'd marry you in Peter's house where he met you without that much grandeur. However, seeing you so excited for having a little wedding and the glimpse of you in a gorgeous dress, decreased his peeving. He did everything you wanted, just for the sake of seeing your smile.

This week, you'd finally see a venue that had tickled his interest. Something comfortable enough for a reduced number of people. Neither of you had much friends, which was good economically wise, not that you were struggling, he just found it useless to splurge a lot of money on people he didn't know. The ceremony would be something for friends and family.

At first he wasn't sure of asking you about your family.

"Do you plan on telling them?"

"I will. Just my dad and my eldest aunt."

He held your hand and squeezed gently.

"Are you sure of it?"

"Yes. Dad well... he's alright. And my Tia is the only one I actually like there, so..."

You rested your head on his lap, and caressed his chin.

"And your brother?"

"He's in another country right now. And doubt he reaches to show up in time. Just them."

Miguel nodded and weaved his fingers through the silkiness of your hair.

"Alright then."

"Are you inviting your mom?"

He heaved and shook his head.

"No. Doubt she comes in good spirits anyway."

Humming, you nodded and kissed his hands.

"Alright. I think we won't be even that much people anyways. Feels like an elopement"

He chuckled while you played with his fingers.

"Isn't it? The only difference is that we chose to have witnesses."

You curled in his chest and smiled

----

The venue was as charming as the ad promised. A backyard looking space which grass was greener than envy itself, wild flowers painted the milieu with their rich colors, a little lake on the side to make it look straight out of a fairytale.

Miguel couldn't help but squeeze you as your eyes shone with excitement.

----

You nearly had a crisis when the perfect dress you had picked wasn't available in your size. Even though Miguel tried to comfort you by saying you'd look gorgeous even in a burlap potato sack, you didn't want a traditional princess pompous dress.

You wanted to make his jaw drop. So you went the extra mile to get it done with little retouches. Even Gabi had a little dress custom made for her along a matching headband.

The dress turned out even better and was easier to slip out of it. The venue was looking perfect, the wedding planner had surely made it look just like you wanted. Cozy, intimate, truly ready to celebrate with those that had been through it all with Miguel and you.

Sadly, not everything was butterflies in the meadows. Some family members of yours had known about your wedding, and naturally, they didn't like the fact you had excluded them. Your mother specially.

Even if the confrontation was unavoidable, you stood your ground and not invited her, and your other relatives. Severing the troublesome bond for good.

She only saw Gabi briefly, and left.

Miguel gave you a little reassuring that night ~

And finally the day came.

You took breakfast together, and then went to your respective activities during the day.

"See you later, Mr. O'Hara." You squeezed and slapped his butt before sending him off.

"Just for you to know, I'm getting my revenge later, cariño"

"Looking forward to it, nalgón" (bubble butt)

He greeted Gabi, played a bit with her and left.

Jessica and MJ arrived a couple of hours later and soon the preparations begun. Your dress and Gabi's finally arrived.

You bathed her and got her ready for the day.

"Whose taking her for the wedding night?"

"Oh no, we're taking her with us."

"Thought your aunt Isa would take her."

"Miguel refused. It's not like we-"

"Uh uh. Don't tell me"

Jessica's lips pursed, annoyed as you giggled.

"Anyways, look at this beautiful princesita!"

You put Gabi her little headband and snapped a picture to send it to Miguel.

Mi princesa preciosa. She looks so beautiful. Can't wait to see you.

The text made you smile and gave you enough boost to keep through the motions. The makeup artist and stylist came, MJ was the first, then Jessica and finally you.

While they got ready, you made sure to breastfeed Gabi and put her to sleep so you could get ready without much issue.

You spammed Miguel with silly pictures.

See this cereal?

Hm?

It's missing something.

Milk?

No. Not any milk. Yours 😘.

His cheeks had turned flushed as he was getting ready with Peter.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

You're so in trouble.

----

Two pm came and the small guest list filled in the room. Gabriel was his groomsman. Around twenty people were there including some coworkers from Miguel's, your aunt Isa, surprisingly your brother had arrived on time and attended as well. Around twenty people in total.

All seated in their respective spaces.

Miguel constantly loosened the tie, only for Gabriel to fix it for him.

I'm almost there, Gabi was hungry.

He sighed and as he was about to fiddle with his neck again, Gabriel slapped his hand away.

"Relájate. Ya va a venir." (Relax, she's in her way)

Gabriel gave him a little bottle of tequila.

"Drink it."

He gulped it down and sighed.

"Better?"

"Yeah."

"Vows ready?"

"Si."

Gabriel chuckled and patted his shoulder.

"You'll do great. Relax."

His cue to enter was there and with a deep sigh he walked to the altar.

Many looked at him with genuine excited faces. If he was honest, a wedding was the last thing in his mind, it was one of those things he thought once in almost never. But now, things were different.

He was different. You didn't fix him, just improved him, guided him through the darkest things to make amends with himself and allow him to overcome so many fears.

Having a family mainly. His own problems had hindered his growth in so many levels, but with your help and patience, everything was a bit easier. Your nurtured him with things he didn't even knew he needed.

And now, he was about to get you all to himself before anyone else. Of course there had been men that tried to take you away from him, but your loyalty to him was unwavering. What other proof he needed when you stood there, like an angel in a lovely dress, ready to take him as your husband.

Your dad walked next to you, waltzing you to the altar as Jessica and MJ followed you. A proud feeling invaded Miguel's chest. He gave your dad a firm handshake, an unspoken Thank you for giving her to me.

Miguel took your hand, giving a kiss to your palm.

"Hola."

"Hola"

The smile in his face was one that disarmed you. His eyes were full of pride and love, just like yours. Someone took a picture.

Your aunt Isa held Gabi. And soon, the ceremony begun. The wedding officiant gave the introduction speech, and soon the vows were brought up. Miguel started.

His hands trembled softly as he pulled out the small sheet he had wrote them in. Some blotches of ink sprawled, discarded words and the like.

Your name rolled of his tongue. So ever sweet, yet teasing.

"Mi corazón. I know I'm not good with words, but know that they're true when I say, you know better than anyone how difficult I can be. My nature and constant attitude often pushed people away." Here he pauses, a subtle softening in his eyes as he looks upon you.

"But you," he continues, "saw past all that. With your warmth and good humor, you stayed by my side. You eased my worries and made me feel understood. Because of you, I've learned that opening my heart does not make me weak - it makes me stronger." A little smile tugs at his lips now.

"I promise to cherish your love and welcome your light each day. You are the place I long to come to every day. My vow to you is this - I will strive to show you each day how much you and your faith in me mean. You are my partner in crime and all things, mi Pitufina. I am yours, now and always."

Your hand squeezed him tighter, noticing a little flush on his ears and cheeks.

"Thanks for giving me the honor of being your husband and the father of our child, mi niña."

You kissed his hand as he looked at Gabi as the crowd clapped.

"Miguel. Mi amor. Papasito"

The attendants chuckled and Miguel cleared his throat as you giggled.

"Ever since I saw you, I thought, damn he's tall. I'd climb him like a tree."

He couldn't help but choke. Gabriel cleared his throat, trying to suppress a laugh, Peter tittered under his breath and your dad stared intensely at Miguel.

Jessica face-palmed and MJ just smiled.

" But jokes aside, It surprised me you really went to open that beer with your teeth. And that alone made me curious about you and again I thought, yeah this man is mine." He rolled his eyes with a tiny smirk.

"We've been through so much that it's impossible to pick one single moment I wasn't fascinated by you."

His eyes softened and you squeezed his hands lovingly

"We've had our downs and up, cause no relationship is perfect nor easy. You've taught me so much about myself it's ridiculous how well you know me." You smiled,

"I know that I'm not the easiest woman to handle or be with some days, but know that you have someone that will be through thick and thin with you, yesterday, today and always."

You took a deep breath, "I can't wait to see what life has in store for us, Mi amor. Te amo. And I can't wait to kiss you."

He chuckled. Once the vows finished, the ceremony kept going. Gabi was the ring girl, and with the aid of Tia Isa, delivered the ring to you both.

Neither Miguel or you hesitated to say I do. Just made the moment even sweeter when you kissed as newlyweds.

"I introduce you, ladies and gentlemen to Mr. and Mrs. O'Hara"

The crowd cheered you both. Miguel took Gabi after you dad took several pictures with her.

She cooed upon seeing Miguel. Then, you both moved to the next location a couple of steps away.

Tables neatly adorned, the lights were set with an intensity enough to not overwhelm Miguel’s eyesight. Your dad took once more Gabi, letting you have the first dance with Miguel.

The soft and mellow beat of "My Love Mine All Mine" echoed through the speakers. Miguel hadn't tell you but he had been practicing a bit more his waltz. Funnily enough, Gabriel had been his dance dummy. Lots of crushed toes and sore feet later was worth your surprised face as he twirled you and swayed you through the song.

You thanked him with a big smooch and a smile. Your wedding rings clinked as you took each other's hands.

"Mr. O'Hara?"

"Yes?"

You got on your tiptoes and kissed him.

"You happy?"

He shrugged, earning a playful gasp from you.

"Been better"

"So mean!"

He took your chin and gave a little kiss

"I'm proud of you, Miguel." He huffed softly and you pulled a little strand from his hair as a revenge.

"I loved your vows."

"You kidding me? I nearly choked."

Giggling you lead him to your seats.

"Now, we gotta hear how people make fun of us."

"I will also too."

"Enough with your vows, cariño."

You giggled

"You looked like plum! All red!"

"Impossible not to when you said you wanna climb me like a tree"

You kissed him with a laugh, "Well yeah. I've climbed through those mountains-"

"Stop" His shoulders shook softly at the silent laugh he gave you.

"See? What would you do without me?"

"Probably overwork myself until death."

"I was being sarcastic, but still doesn't sounds good."

"I'm way too used to having you around."

Your eyes softened and hooked your hand in the joint of his forearm.

"Well, lucky for you, I'm stuck with you. Forever. Or until one of us deci-"

He nipped your ear. A clear Shut Up.

"You talk too much when nervous."

----

The rest of the wedding unfolded as expected. Almost everyone laughed at the friend's speeches about you two.

Gabriel gave a half funny half heartfelt speech about how happy he was for his brother. And Peter he plainly embarrassed Miguel by saying how much of a nervous and babbling mess your now husband was whenever you looked his way or interacted somehow with him.

And once the reception ended, you went to your hotel with Gabi.

You both were far too tired to actually have sex, or celebrate it.

Miguel had to remove Gabi since she fell asleep latching from your breast. He was tempted to wake you up by eating you out, instead he carried you to bed after putting Gabi next to your sleeping form that ended up in his arms.

Miguel O'Hara was now a married man.

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